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Old 07-27-2018, 05:45 PM   #1
starryprince
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Hey all.

So, after waiting a year, my top surgery consultation is coming up. I know that I want it but my mom is not on board with it. She wants me to be happy and she even offered to help pay for the surgery if my insurance does not cover all of it. That made me really happy because she could see how much this means to me.

My issue is that..well, my mom isn't on board. She is really religious and believes, "God made you this way for a reason." I'm an adult but her opinion still matters, especially since we have a tight bond. I think, as much as we accept ourselves, we value our parents' opinions. I know I wouldn't be able to take care of myself after the surgery and that's what's bothering me. She has to come to the hospital, take me home, and help me out. I'm really nervous about that. If I could be independent, I wouldn't mind so much.

It's hard to explain, but now that my consultation is in a few weeks, the reality is beginning to hit me with regards to my mom and her views on it. I just feel really weird and confused.

I just wanted to get these feelings out. Thanks for reading.
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Old 07-28-2018, 11:13 AM   #2
QuietMind
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I believe "god" made some of us with "some reassembly required"

I hope the surgery will go well and that you will heal swiftly and well. I hope your mother will come around to the notion that this is necessary gender affirming surgery. "god" made me with weak eyes and I nearly went blind as a premature baby if not for modern medicine. One can argue that "god" has a calling for each person and for some, that calling is to be surgeons performing gender affirming surgery.

Maybe introduce her to some trans affirming theology I have been recommended these 2 personal memoirs:

1) This Is My Body: Hearing the theology of transgender Christians by Christina Beardsley

2) My Name is Brett: Truths from a Trans Christian by Brett Ray
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Old 07-29-2018, 04:44 AM   #3
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I'm so glad you got approved for top surgery btw
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Old 08-03-2018, 10:37 PM   #4
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I feel for you, hope your surgery goes well! i can relate to you abut your mom, I had the same issue with mine only i went the other way with top surgery (male breast augmentation) I had mine enlarged, believe me my mom was not pleased at all that her son was getting breasts. she did come around and help support me while I was recovering, her amy my sister both helped, even though she was against the procedure I was her son and she came through big time for me! She has come around a bit, still not happy about my looks but supports me to a point.
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