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Old 03-08-2005, 12:31 AM   #11
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Default Re: Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

Yea, to some degree I am but I had a lot of help in getting to the depths of depression that I'm in now. Welcome to the self-esteem forum!
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Old 03-08-2005, 01:42 AM   #12
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Default Re: Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

Thanks, Dr. John, for a great place to discuss issues associated with developing self-esteem. I think this serves a really positive purpose.
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Old 03-08-2005, 03:02 AM   #13
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Wow, a self-esteem forum. Sounds like a good idea to me.They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks, but I am up for the challenge.
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Old 03-08-2005, 07:56 AM   #14
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Default Re: Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

Brilliant idea - think I may be here a lot Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

Good self esteem is the most important thing to try and acheive. And I would imagine that most of us on here are lacking in it, at least in some areas.

I have struggled with it all my life........Poppet
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Old 03-08-2005, 02:12 PM   #15
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Default Re: Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

Wooooooooohooooooooooooooo!! Thanks, Doc John! What a pleasant surprise!

Thankyouthankyouthankyou! Welcome to the self-esteem forum!
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Old 03-08-2005, 02:35 PM   #16
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Default Re: Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

He aims to please! Welcome to the self-esteem forum!
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Old 03-08-2005, 02:58 PM   #17
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</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
THREE Faces of Low Self-Esteem

Most of us have an image of what low self-esteem looks like, but it is not always so easy to recognize. Here are three common faces that low self-esteem may wear:

The Impostor: acts happy and successful, but is really terrified of failure. Lives with the constant fear that she or he will be "found out." Needs continuous successes to maintain the mask of positive self-esteem, which may lead to problems with perfectionism, procrastination, competition, and burn-out.


The Rebel: acts like the opinions or good will of others - especially people who are important or powerful - don't matter. Lives with constant anger about not feeling "good enough." Continuously needs to prove that others' judgments and criticisms don't hurt, which may lead to problems like blaming others excessively, breaking rules or laws, or fighting authority.


The Loser: acts helpless and unable to cope with the world and waits for someone to come to the rescue. Uses self-pity or indifference as a shield against fear of taking responsibility for changing his or her life. Looks constantly to others for guidance, which can lead to such problems as lacking assertiveness skills, under-achievement, and excessive reliance on others in relationships.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

This is from the link Doc John posted to us to get us going. Does anyone recognize themselves even just a little bit? Don't feel bad. I do! Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

Right here: Lives with constant anger about not feeling "good enough." Continuously needs to prove that others' judgments and criticisms don't hurt, which may lead to problems like blaming others excessively, breaking rules or laws, or fighting authority. And then this: problems with perfectionism, procrastination,... and burn-out.


Speaking for myself, I already know what caused my lack of self-esteem, but sometimes I wonder if we really need to know the "why." The fact is, I need to work on it some more.

What do ya'll think? Do you feel you need to know who, why or what? It's your choice.

Like I've said, I've always been a rebel in one way or the other. That's not to say that I didn't believe the critisisms; I did. Old tapes. When I hear them, I tell myself exactly the opposite.

"You're so dumb!" - "No, I'm not! I've always passed my English classes with an 'A'!" My therapist told me that if one has the mastery of the English language, like being able to read and right well, then the doors of the world are open to you.

"Why can't you be more like your cousins?!" - Because I'm not them. I AM me; my own unique self with my own likes and dislikes and my own goals in life.

"I want you to have an important career like your cousins." - I want my "career" to be a good wife and mother. (BTW... I made it! Welcome to the self-esteem forum! ) I've also gone as far as I can go with college English classes. Welcome to the self-esteem forum! Maybe in my later years, I'll be a writer. Not my mother's idea of an "important career." Not mine either! hehe I've already accomplished that!

Good luck, guys! I'm really looking forward to what this forum is going to accomplish. Welcome to the self-esteem forum!

An important PS: You guys that feel you have a better handle on self-esteem, please, please contribute your experiences. We all need all the help we can get.
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Old 03-08-2005, 03:04 PM   #18
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Default Re: Let\'s get on with it! :D

I'm the same as you, especially with PTSD as the focus of it. My ex is the faker--excuse me, the imposter. Had to scroll down. Same difference, I suppose. Welcome to the self-esteem forum!
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Old 03-08-2005, 03:29 PM   #19
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Default Re: Let\'s get on with it! :D

Me, I am the Loser. I definitely wait for someone to come to the rescue. Only, I don't think I act helpless, I am helpless. Sometimes I feel like this is the real me. That when I was holding down a job, and doing a great job at work, that was fake. Make sense?
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Old 03-08-2005, 05:08 PM   #20
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Thanks Doc. Welcome to the self-esteem forum!
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