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Old 06-13-2018, 09:27 AM   #1
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Default Recurring Recently Changed

I was recently dx with BP. For many years I have this recurring dream. I'm driving down this amazingly beautiful road. It is hilly, curvy, and mountains (BTW: I do a lot of mountain hiking). All of a sudden I come across a hill, I lose control of the car and it speeds into a body of water at the end of the road. I wake up as water is overtaking my nose.

Recently I had been up for three days straight but slept two hours the next night and had the dream. TThe last thing I remember is thinking God was telling me that all these years he'd been telling me if I drove my car into a body of water I would save everyone a lot of heartache. I didn't think I could do it sober. I put on some shorts so hypothermia might help and went and picked up a bottle of wine. That's the last I remember until I was on suicide watch in jail.

Two nights ago I had the dream but it had changed. I've been doing really well on Lamictal (Sp?). I feel better than I have since before Hurricane Harvey. This time I wasn't driving down the same kind of road. It was a dirt road and rolling hills versus the steep ones. Rather than driving into the body of water my car skidded and stopped parallel to the lake.

I've never been able to figure out what these dreams mean but I always wake up very shaken even with the last one that didn't end the same way.
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