How do you know if you’re asexual? - Forums at Psych Central


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Old 02-02-2018, 05:32 AM #1
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Default How do you know if you’re asexual?

Or if it’s just a ‘phase’ or part of larger issue - depression, anxiety...

I’ve never really been into the idea of sex. It doesn’t interest me and I am content without it. I don’t long to have sexual encounters, I don’t crave it. I am a female, I have had sex with one male. People say ‘don’t let one bad experience turn you away’, but it wasn’t a ‘bad experience’. It was unwanted in some ways. The reason I ever did it was to keep the guy around. There comes a point in a relationship where sex comes into play, and we were at that point - he was at that point, so I let it happen. I didn’t enjoy it, it just happened. It was nothing for me, and it continued to be nothing - a chore.

After that relationship ended, I tried to go out and ‘hook up’. I had plenty of opportunity with different men each weekend, but I never wanted it.

I crave the affection, but nothing at all sexual. I crave the closeness, the intimacy of such a relationship, but again, not sex. I like my clothing on, and I like other people’s clothing on them.

All signs point to asexual, but I don’t think I’ve been willing to accept It because maybe it is just a phase, maybe one day I will want sex.

I donno. I just wanted to speak this somewhere. It’s not something I ever speak of so, here you go!
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Old 02-03-2018, 05:32 AM #2
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Default Re: How do you know if you’re asexual?

Umm ... I hope it's not inapproriate if I ask. Do you like hugging, kissing, touching? Do you touch yourself? If not, you might be asexual, but if yes, it might be something else.
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Old 02-03-2018, 02:59 PM #3
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Smile Re: How do you know if you’re asexual?

I don't know if any of this will be of any interest or help, but here are links to some articles from PsychCentral's archives on the subject of asexuality:

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/singl...dea-about-sex/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/singl...olarly-essays/

Also... here's a link to The Asexual Visibility & Education Network:

The Asexual Visibility and Education Network | asexuality.org

My best wishes to you...
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Old 02-04-2018, 12:27 AM #4
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Default Re: How do you know if you’re asexual?

Quote:
Originally Posted by gmts View Post
Umm ... I hope it's not inapproriate if I ask. Do you like hugging, kissing, touching? Do you touch yourself? If not, you might be asexual, but if yes, it might be something else.
Umm good with hugging - though it takes a pretty special person to get a hug from me, kissing is, uncomfortable. And touching myself doesn’t happen. So.. yeah.. I don’t have a problem with being asexual, I just, I’m really on fence about it, whether I’ll pass through this stage, or if this is just me
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Old 02-05-2018, 03:07 AM #5
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Default Re: How do you know if you’re asexual?

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Originally Posted by 20oney View Post
Umm good with hugging - though it takes a pretty special person to get a hug from me, kissing is, uncomfortable. And touching myself doesn’t happen.
I'm by far not an expert on this, but I'd think that at least currently it could be considered as asexual.
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Old 02-16-2018, 12:00 PM #6
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Default Re: How do you know if you’re asexual?

I like to phrase it "I identify as asexual". Saying 'I am' sounds a bit too permanent in my ears.
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