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Old 01-05-2013, 01:08 AM #1
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Shocked I Need a Bit of Advice

I'm a teen, that's all you need to know about that. I know I'm bisexual because I like both males and females. I've had sex with guy awhile ago because we really like each other. We were really close as friends. The thing is, I kind of regret having sex with him since it messed up our friendship. So after the winter break one of my friends started hitting on me. I had never seen that friend than anything BUT a friend. She's got a kid and possibly another on the way (first due to rape. I am not sure about the coming one). My step sister says I should give my friend a try. Today my friend asked me out. I told her I wanted to get to know her better and she agreed. A few hours ago I got a text from the guy I had sex with. He told me he was coming to town and he wanted to rekindle what we had. I mean, I still like him but I'm also starting to like my other friend. I know he'd want to have sex with me again but my other friend would want my love and maybe some sexual activity. I'm kind of lost right now. Could someone help me out?
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Old 01-05-2013, 05:44 PM #2
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Default Re: I Need a Bit of Advice

Hi there. I hope I can help.

I don't know much about the guy, but I suspect you're correct in being a little dubious in his intentions. I don't know him well, and I defer to your judgment in the situation if you feel my assessment is wrong, but I have to remain a little skeptical in that I fear an ulterior motive in him wanting to get back together with you. If you regret having sex with him then, I don't think a repeat of that will ease that, you know?

On the other hand, it sounds to me like you have a more genuine interest in the woman. My only thing I'm a little concerned of is the fact she is a parent. While that's not a fault or anything at all like that (and indeed, she has my undying respect for being a parent to her first child in regards to the circumstances...truly, she does), but speaking solely for you and you mentioning you are a teen, being a potential stepparent is a LOT of responsibility. That is really my only concern there, and I trust your judgment in that matter. It is only my intention to mention that responsibility you may be taking on for yourself.

Ultimately, I would tell you unless you can truly, honestly say that you wish to be with one over the other, it is best to remain single. You only do yourself a disservice by giving your heart to someone when your heart isn't fully decided. That, ultimately, is my most important piece of advice.

I wish you all of the best, and I hope I was of some help.

My absolute best,
Harley
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Old 01-05-2013, 09:00 PM #3
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Default Re: I Need a Bit of Advice

A wise old friend told do not have sex w/ anyone you do not have intentions of marrying. Accidents do happen, even in the safest of places on pratices.

If the girl you are thinking of is a new relationship you should not be thinking of sex w/ someone you don't know all that well.

As for the guy, if sex changed your friendship then you have to be friends before you can be lovers. If the friend thing was weird after sex it will be more weird after more sex.

Thats just my opinion. Best of luck w/ what ever you decide.
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Old 01-08-2013, 08:30 PM #4
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Default Re: I Need a Bit of Advice

Having intimate relations with someone is putting you in your most vulnerable position. It is an expression of love, or should be, and if you don't love someone or you aren't sure if they love you, abstain. Its easy to get hurt when you have given yourself to someone who just considers you someone to have fun with.

I would agree with Harley about sticking to one preference. Your body belongs to you. Have respect for it. I'm not a prude, but I do believe that sex is not something to do just because it feels good. It should be more than just scratching an itch. Decide which gender you feel most attracted to and then get to know that person well before giving yourself away.

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