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Unread 01-25-2017, 11:36 PM   #1
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Default Depressed and Spiritually Numb

I am a Christian woman so I thought I'd venture into this forum. I have depression and for some reason it's really bad at the moment. I go through highs and lows and every few years or so I hit a low, low. Last time I felt this way, the trigger was the stress of completing a master's thesis. I've now hit my lowest low in ten years and I'm not 100% sure what the trigger was. I was very hurt by someone, but I'm not sure that was the trigger. Nonetheless, I've been extremely depressed and dealing with feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness. Sometimes I feel like God has abandoned me or as if He'll never show up in my life. I want to find comfort in God, but He doesn't always feel real to me. I think I'm starting to feel numb spiritually. Being a Christian, this terrifies me. I want to be spiritually while and the truth is I don't know if I can be. I think this is where my hopelessness is coming from. I don't see a future where I ever feel whole again. Thank you for listening. This is the first time I'm ever admitting this.
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Unread 01-26-2017, 12:41 PM   #2
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Default Re: Depressed and Spiritually Numb

Completing You Masters Thesis may have been the trigger for this. You may feel you do not deserve success. Therapy an help you deal with the depression.
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Unread 01-26-2017, 01:38 PM   #3
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Default Re: Depressed and Spiritually Numb

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rippedhose View Post
Sometimes I feel like God has abandoned me or as if He'll never show up in my life.
That would be a mere thought, question or intellectual conclusion, not an emotion or feeling...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rippedhose View Post
I want to find comfort in God, but He doesn't always feel real to me. I think I'm starting to feel numb spiritually.
That is because much of Christianity is dependent upon mere emotion rather than continued faith and trust.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rippedhose View Post
I want to be spiritually whole and the truth is I don't know if I can be. I think this is where my hopelessness is coming from. I don't see a future where I ever feel whole again.
I do not see a future in this life as I presently know it where I will experience all the things I would like to be able to have and to feel while still here, but that kind of hopelessness is not what we carry along into the hereafter. Giving thanks in all things is not easy when many things are far from pleasant, and my own depression is a daily challenge while I nevertheless still keep my eyes upon the skies and my heart and mind where they belong.
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Unread 02-13-2017, 05:43 PM   #4
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Default Re: Depressed and Spiritually Numb

Even though you don't feel spiritual you are
Just remember when you felt that way it will happen again.
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Unread 02-13-2017, 05:53 PM   #5
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Default Re: Depressed and Spiritually Numb

Relax, nothing is wrong with you. You may be confident in the what you have found but a small problem might be the where to do so? I myself was really lost until a whole new experience made me suddenly feel connected. I discovered in my own case that Spiritual connection was mainly found in the extreme out of doors. I never felt whole until I was in a thick forest, on a side of a mountain, or paddling a kayak. It was extraordinary the sudden channeling of my own interpretation of the Creative Spirit.

So don't lose hope - or your particular belief system. You may just have not found the right place and time for it to express itself in you yet.
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