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Old 07-14-2009, 05:17 PM   #11
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Yet self harming threads are just as triggering, and can actually lead to accidental death.

I think we should be allowed to express how we feel, whether that's suicidal, sad, depressed, lonely, triggered, hurting, suffering, happiness, etc.

Being heard is important and being less alone and feeling related to is important, too.

But yeah.
It's doubtful the rule will be changed.
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Old 07-15-2009, 02:51 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pupp View Post
Yet self harming threads are just as triggering, and can actually lead to accidental death.

I think we should be allowed to express how we feel, whether that's suicidal, sad, depressed, lonely, triggered, hurting, suffering, happiness, etc.

Being heard is important and being less alone and feeling related to is important, too.
But yeah.
It's doubtful the rule will be changed.
Jmo...
There is obviously a big difference in an accidental death and a planned one.
Struggling with SI is absolutely dangerous, and much support and understanding is given. It can give the poster time to think before acting, or seek medical help if they have already SId and it's serious.
There is a chance to prevent, to guide and direct someone.

With suicidal posts, there is nothing anyone here can do.
Oh wait, there is...we can worry and weep and wonder if that person did it.
Sharing feelings of despair and needing comfort is vastly different from an announcement of "here I go..."
What the heck can anyone do with that kind of post??
Nothing.

I have seen it happen on another forum where someone will post about their detailed plans on their final exit. Nothing is heard from them despite pleas to get help, numbers for the Hot Lines, numerous offers of personal phone calls...

There is a void, but there is also a question of whether that person was serious and did it; or was it an attention getter.
Crap like that stirs up a lot of guilt, fear, and sadness from those who tried to help.

There has to be some kind of boundary about these things.

Sharing most feelings and reaching out for help has never been discouraged here at PC.

For the protection of the community as a whole, yeah, it's been asked that members do not make suicidal posts.

Jmo, of course

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Old 07-15-2009, 03:36 AM   #13
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Default Re: suicidal posts

that was a really helpful clarification, sabby, thank you. do you think that bit you quoted could be put in the depression forums instead of the current message? or maybe a link to that quote? because i have been reading it like meso - that suicidal content is inappropriate, not just threats/plans.
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Old 07-15-2009, 05:42 PM   #14
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Whether an "attention getter" or seriously considering, they should be heard and supported.

I've tried to attempt suicide more than 30+, I've just lost count now, times in my life, since age 9, through to last year in December, almost succeeding many times, I think people do understand suicidal idealization, suicidal feelings, suicidal thoughts, as well as SI/SH. I just think people should be heard and should say how they feel/what they are thinking for a chance to open the door to help/being supported.

But I know this one opinion won't matter to change a rule like that. Just my opinion, and that's it. Cheers.
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Old 07-16-2009, 12:36 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pupp View Post
Whether an "attention getter" or seriously considering, they should be heard and supported.

I just think people should be heard and should say how they feel/what they are thinking for a chance to open the door to help/being supported.

But I know this one opinion won't matter to change a rule like that. Just my opinion, and that's it. Cheers.
I agree with you that people deserve to be heard Pupp....most definitely. Thank you for your input

While we have a lot of leeway to speak our minds here, there are some things that we just cannot help members with, and that is real life, real time assistance to a member who is actively suicidal. This needs to be dealt with between a member and a professional who can help and treat immediately for that member's safety. DocJohn created this guideline to help keep our community safe and to aid those who are suicidal to look IRL for support and help.

Many members have suicidal ideation every single day. It's not against guidelines to discuss that one is feeling like this, and as long as there is no plan or discussion of how they would accomplish it, one can reach out for support and help.

Pupp, if you feel really strongly about your thoughts on this, you are more than welcome to pm DocJohn and let him know. I can't speak for him as to if he would or would not change this guideline, that's up to him.


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Old 07-17-2009, 12:23 AM   #16
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Thanks sabby, I also agree that people deserve to be heard.
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Old 07-17-2009, 03:30 AM   #17
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I too wondered about this when I first signed up - I did think to myself that even talking about contemplating suicide could be conceived as a threat & would therefore be inappropriate & unwelcome. I do fully understand the reasoning for the rule & sabby's clarifications make absolute sense to me.

I did wonder if the resources links under the depression forum & maybe a link back to the appropriate section of the main site's Resources pages, might be duplicated somewhere on the main forum index page - just so they're more immediately available for somebody in crisis? (My reasoning for that, is that when I visit the site, the main forum index is nearly always the 1st page I hit.)
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Old 07-17-2009, 05:54 AM   #18
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I thought I'd join in on the discussion.

I agree 100% to what Pupp is asking for.

When I start having thoughts of the terrible S word the very last place that I would want to go to during that period of time is to a hospital. The best thing that I need is for someone or a group of people willing to listen to what I have to say and to allow me to vent my feelings without fearing of being incarcerated for a period of time. I don't want to be viewed as a crazed suicidal person and to be pumped up with drugs when all I need is for someone to listen to me.
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Old 07-17-2009, 06:53 AM   #19
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I agree with Helga. Suicidal people need help, they need a caring person to listen to them. Is that more likely in a hospital or with friends? I know for sure friends just talking to someone can and does save lives.

We can do more than we think.
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Old 07-17-2009, 11:54 AM   #20
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I'm in total agreement that a person who is on the edge and really contemplating, needs to have the opportunity to talk, be heard and work through it, if at all possible.

But there is a difference between ideation and being on the edge. There has to be a line drawn somewhere in an online community such as PC. Unfortunately, we cannot be everything to everybody. First and foremost PC supplies us with a place to talk, make connections and provide all members with valuable information and a level of safety that is so very important in continuing the mission of this site.

I hope you can all understand that the guideline in place is not meant to stifle any of us it is meant to keep the community safe and to help guide us in the direction that may need to be taken.

Much love and respect,

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