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Old 12-13-2018, 07:09 AM   #1
leomama
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Default I am really struggling

Itís been a month since Iíve been ghosted/discarded. My daughter is back in town and now I really wish my fiancť was here to help me but heís gone without a trace. At the time we were in a relationship he had so much other stuff going on but now heís free and heís forsaken me.
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Old 12-13-2018, 03:19 PM   #2
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Sorry you are having to go through this now. I hope things get better.
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Old 12-13-2018, 07:19 PM   #3
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Hugs, leomama. So sorry you're dealing with the aftermath of your fiancť leaving you. Please be kind to yourself during this time. You deserve it.
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Old 12-13-2018, 07:19 PM   #4
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I hate to say this but it sounds like you are much better off without him. The more things you do on your own the more independent you will grow.

I was 54 when I finally left my H. I had never lived alone & I bought my farm 2100 miles away from him in a town & state where I knew no one. After 11 years I had contact again for a court hearing against him. We actually had a civil closure. It was interesting because one of his comments was that he thought within 2 years I would come back & I never did. I lived my totally independent life alone with my farm & my dogs & real friends for the first time in my life.

There is a good life one can have after a bad relationship.
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Old 12-13-2018, 07:44 PM   #5
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I am sorry. Itís really unkind of him to ghost you like this. It shows you what kind of person he is.

But Iíd say if he told you he broke up with you a year ago, he maybe doesnít consider you two a couple. It sounds that you two were not on the same page and had a bit different vision of all this. Iíd ship him a ring (if he didnít take it when he broke up with you), hopefully you have his address and be done. Iíd not expect his help with anything.

You spent so many years waiting for him. Waiting for his visits or for his divorce. Time to enjoy your life not waiting for anyone.
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Old 12-13-2018, 07:57 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eskielover View Post
I hate to say this but it sounds like you are much better off without him. The more things you do on your own the more independent you will grow.

I was 54 when I finally left my H. I had never lived alone & I bought my farm 2100 miles away from him in a town & state where I knew no one. After 11 years I had contact again for a court hearing against him. We actually had a civil closure. It was interesting because one of his comments was that he thought within 2 years I would come back & I never did. I lived my totally independent life alone with my farm & my dogs & real friends for the first time in my life.

There is a good life one can have after a bad relationship.
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Old 12-13-2018, 07:59 PM   #7
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I'm sorry you're struggling right now.
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Old 12-13-2018, 08:01 PM   #8
leomama
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Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966 View Post
I am sorry. Itís really unkind of him to ghost you like this. It shows you what kind of person he is.

But Iíd say if he told you he broke up with you a year ago, he maybe doesnít consider you two a couple. It sounds that you two were not on the same page and had a bit different vision of all this. Iíd ship him a ring (if he didnít take it when he broke up with you), hopefully you have his address and be done. Iíd not expect his help with anything.

You spent so many years waiting for him. Waiting for his visits or for his divorce. Time to enjoy your life not waiting for anyone.
No he doesn't, although he said to me if he had a girlfriend it was me, he actually gave me back his ring. He broke up with me but then asked me out for my birthday months later and told me loved me just last month. I don't have his address.
Yes I waited and waited only to have my heart broken. Ironic isn't it?
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Old 12-13-2018, 08:03 PM   #9
leomama
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eskielover View Post
I hate to say this but it sounds like you are much better off without him. The more things you do on your own the more independent you will grow.

I was 54 when I finally left my H. I had never lived alone & I bought my farm 2100 miles away from him in a town & state where I knew no one. After 11 years I had contact again for a court hearing against him. We actually had a civil closure. It was interesting because one of his comments was that he thought within 2 years I would come back & I never did. I lived my totally independent life alone with my farm & my dogs & real friends for the first time in my life.

There is a good life one can have after a bad relationship.
I'm tired of being on my own and independent. Now I have one failed marriage and one failed engagement. I've been on my own since I was 18. I definitely don't think I'm better off with him.
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Old 12-13-2018, 08:04 PM   #10
leomama
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Hugs, leomama. So sorry you're dealing with the aftermath of your fiancť leaving you. Please be kind to yourself during this time. You deserve it.
I'm trying, I feel like an idiot.
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