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Old 11-22-2018, 01:20 PM #21
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Default Re: When you know you're with the wrong person

I know this to be true in mine, and my H's life of over 26 years. We are like left, and right, and once he has physically/sexually abused me, but emotionally abuses most days. I know this is wrong to let him by with all of this, but our situation is complicated. I pray that some day he will fix himself, or I will be able to change this, but there isn't anything I can do at this time, and we do have over 26 years together, and this alone makes it hard.
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Old 11-22-2018, 02:09 PM #22
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((((2daffodils)))) I'm so sorry you're struggling. Please dump him as soon as you can... he's not worth it. You, on the other hand, deserve so much better... don't waste your life chasing him. Just cut him out of your life - all the "good moments" you seem to be having together are likely him manipulating you. Please stay safe and take care of yourself. I'm sorry
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Old 11-22-2018, 07:15 PM #23
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Originally Posted by 2daffodils View Post
How do I know if this man is right for me? I said I know he's not right, but I'm not sure. He keeps changing his mind about living with me. He says I'm controlling, but I see him as controlling. He'll say things like, "dont do the dishes", then days later, I see you didn't even do the dishes. I love you and I want you in my life. Days later, I want you to get your things oout and I want nothing from you. Then, I love you. THen, he'll say I don't know what I want. Then he says I miss you already after leaving for one day, and he says, yes I want you to live with me. Then, "as long as we get along"


Can anyone help me out? This confusion is driving me crazy. I often feel like he doesn't appreciate me, but then I feel like I have nothing left if I break up with him and leave him. I have already spilled my guts to a frriend on here, and the opiinion is, he's a jerk and I've nothing to lose, well not much if I leave him or he breaks up with me and takes me back for the umpteenth time.



Do I even know what love is, when this guy can put me down for the smallest mistakes and make me feel worse about myslelf. Yet I think I love him. At this point, I don't care what response I get here, I don't care what anyone thinks of me.


I'm getting older and I don't want to find another bf. Ever. If we break up that's it for me and I feel like I've invested a lot in this relationship for 3 years.
I donít see any confusion. He treats you badly. How can he be right for you? It doesnít matter how many years you spent with him. If he was a jerk for 3 years, heíll be a jerk for next 10 years and youíll be even older then. If you enjoy being put down and being treated badly and inconsistently then Iíd say itís ok to stay with him (just please donít have kids with him), but if you are unhappy then whatís the point? You definitely can do better than that.
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Old 11-23-2018, 10:50 PM #24
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I so wish I had taken this advice sooner. I stayed with the bf today. He's asked me to hide his last bit of weed for him before so he has some for the next day. He was sleeping after he had his joint. He's depending on me because he irresponsibly changed his snow tires and they started to come off last weekend. I've offered to help him get groceries and take and pick him up after work because he had his car towed and wrecked the threads on the tire rods. He was so irritated today because he's financially in trouble because he wants his car fixed.

I believe he stole my wallet. I know where I left it. There's no other explanation. I reported it stolen. He's acting like he knows nothing. But I've lost all my identity. I think he did this but he can become really physical and I won't accuse him. It wouldn't change anything anyways. It's reported as an "occurence"... the police can do nothing. I'm feeling so horrible. So like I have had enough of life. Did he honestly take the one thing I need? Money and identity? At least my bank card and credit is frozen, I made sure of that.

Please don't judge me tonight. I can't take anymore.
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Old 11-23-2018, 11:43 PM #25
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sadhug:
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Old 11-23-2018, 11:49 PM #26
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I'm so sorry that these latest things have happened.

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Old 11-24-2018, 06:20 AM #27
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Default Re: When you know you're with the wrong person

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2daffodils View Post
I so wish I had taken this advice sooner. I stayed with the bf today. He's asked me to hide his last bit of weed for him before so he has some for the next day. He was sleeping after he had his joint. He's depending on me because he irresponsibly changed his snow tires and they started to come off last weekend. I've offered to help him get groceries and take and pick him up after work because he had his car towed and wrecked the threads on the tire rods. He was so irritated today because he's financially in trouble because he wants his car fixed.

I believe he stole my wallet. I know where I left it. There's no other explanation. I reported it stolen. He's acting like he knows nothing. But I've lost all my identity. I think he did this but he can become really physical and I won't accuse him. It wouldn't change anything anyways. It's reported as an "occurence"... the police can do nothing. I'm feeling so horrible. So like I have had enough of life. Did he honestly take the one thing I need? Money and identity? At least my bank card and credit is frozen, I made sure of that.

Please don't judge me tonight. I can't take anymore.


No judgement, but please break up with him. It's FAR better to be alone than with a total A-hole. If he stole your wallet, or if you even suspect he did, you can never trust him.
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Old 11-24-2018, 08:31 AM #28
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Originally Posted by 2daffodils View Post
This. This is what rings true with me. I do need to friend zone him and then see what his actions are.. if he is even a friend, then I will know. Thanks for understanding me, healing.
I think his actions speak volumes. I cannot even imagine.
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Old 11-24-2018, 11:34 AM #29
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Yes even the way he talked and interacted with me last night spoke volumes. Thank you for the support here.
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Old 11-24-2018, 01:50 PM #30
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(((((2daffodils)))))

I sense a new determination on your part to be rid of him.

I myself am pleased to see that but will continue to support you ads. best that I can, whatever path you may take.

Be strong!
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