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Old 05-15-2018, 08:53 PM   #31
healingme4me
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Yeah, I mean, I totally get being busy and needing to schedule even a week out. That doesn't bother me. But my day is so full, and I'm not waiting around for anyone. I make plans. So I just expect people to be reasonable about their own schedules.

On another note, I keep getting these texts from another guy, usually around 9-10pm, asking "wyd?" which means "what are you doing?" And I'm typically already doing whatever I've planned for the evening, and this guy is always asking me to do drinks last minute, like very last minute. Not like, hey what about tonight or in a couple of hours, but like, right now!

I don't wait around waiting to making plans with people. I make my plans. If he even texted me like in the afternoon and wanted to do happy hour, I could make something work, but I'm so irritated that like he keeps asking me if I'm available at the very last minute. I figure he's just trying to get a booty call or something, or that he texts me when he's bored. I've stopped responding now.
This last guy sounds like one to ditch.

I'd have to go back into this thread. How long ago did the attempt to make plans begin? I get your frustration, but I'm getting an impression of someone trying to juggle a demanding, yet possibly decent paying career? Which could actually mean being a responsible individual? Of course I could be projecting a couple types of men like that, that I'm aware of personally.
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Old 05-15-2018, 09:25 PM   #32
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This last guy sounds like one to ditch.

I'd have to go back into this thread. How long ago did the attempt to make plans begin? I get your frustration, but I'm getting an impression of someone trying to juggle a demanding, yet possibly decent paying career? Which could actually mean being a responsible individual? Of course I could be projecting a couple types of men like that, that I'm aware of personally.
healing, that's what I get too, but we have been trying for a couple of weeks now to make something happen. Like since the end of April.

I totally get trying to juggle a demanding schedule, but if he doesn't have time for me, then it's just not meant to be, right? I mean, the person has to have room for me in their life, right?
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Old 05-15-2018, 09:36 PM   #33
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healing, that's what I get too, but we have been trying for a couple of weeks now to make something happen. Like since the end of April.

I totally get trying to juggle a demanding schedule, but if he doesn't have time for me, then it's just not meant to be, right? I mean, the person has to have room for me in their life, right?
Wow, that's 3 weeks now.

I'm with you on pause for concern about whether there is a priority for making time. I'm in agreement about why join a dating site if it's not realistic for someone to have time to date and pursue an opportunity to seek potential.
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Old 05-15-2018, 10:05 PM   #34
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I’d say when one is too busy to date, he probably shouldn’t date. But honestly even busy peopke can schedule dates. Maybe infrequent and shorter dates but still it could be planned

When I joined dating site I realized I had no time to date and wanted to cancel but they wouldn’t let me without making me pay all 6 months. So I decided to stick around a bit and I’ve met my now husband right away.

At the time I worked two jobs and we worked opposite schedules (he works nights and i work days) and we lived an hour an a half to two hours apart so I told him I can see him only every other week for few hours. He said it would be fine. But we planned and stuck to it, didn’t cancel. Eventually things changed and we were able to see each other more often. But the bottom line: people can plan and keep plans or they shouldn’t date
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Old 05-15-2018, 10:49 PM   #35
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Sometimes if someone is in a routine it takes time to make change happen.....see whst the first date is like (if you can end up with one)....it may be his incentive to change quicker or not.....but at least then you will know for sure whether he us willibg to add another priority into his life
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Old 05-16-2018, 01:08 PM   #36
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Okay, now I'm the sucky one. I need to not schedule things during the week. I need to cancel on him tonight. I have too much crap that needs to get done during the week...I want to meet him, and now I'm afraid if I blow him off that it won't happen at all...but I really will be so stressed out trying to get this stuff done, and worrying about it, that I won't be able to have fun.

Okay, well, hopefully if I could understand getting blown off yesterday, he can understand my life getting crazy today.

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Old 05-16-2018, 01:51 PM   #37
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Maybe you both understand each other better than yiu really thought you did.

Understanding how you yourself feels, can put yiurself in how he feels when his company has time contrained requirements.

Lol....if you can ever find a common time to get together you may find out just how much you do have in common.
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Old 05-16-2018, 02:01 PM   #38
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Maybe you both understand each other better than yiu really thought you did.

Understanding how you yourself feels, can put yiurself in how he feels when his company has time contrained requirements.

Lol....if you can ever find a common time to get together you may find out just how much you do have in common.
Yeah, I already let him know. I should have known better because mid-week is ALWAYS like this for me. I can cut things off on Friday at 5, but between like Tuesday through Friday morning, it's a little like being on call.

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Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

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Old 05-16-2018, 04:07 PM   #39
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I think it’s common to be busy during the week. I never went on dates during the week. In fact I never do anything during the weeks but work and do stuff at home. So you might have to set up dates strictly on the weekends
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Old 05-16-2018, 06:02 PM   #40
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I normally don't schedule stuff during the week but it's been so rough...I needed to do something!
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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