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Old 04-08-2018, 09:49 PM   #1
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Default Help

Maybe someone can help me.
So, I went to the gym today with my girlfriend.
I tried to help her with a new excercise and she
Said that I embarrassed her? I understand it's hard to know the situation if you weren't there. It sounds D's dumb, but it caused a huge fight.
I was very nice in my approach. But to this is a response that I get to some things quite often from her. When she feels embarrassed she gets really angry.
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Old 04-09-2018, 04:13 PM   #2
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Hello Scooby: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I don't know, of course, if you're simply here seeking some insight into this particular concern or if you plan to hang in here with us. (We hope you do.) Should you be planning to continue on, may I suggest you introduce yourself to the general membership on our New Members Introductions forum? Here's a link:

Unfortunately, I don't know as there is much of anything I could say about this. It may be a concern that would be best addressed by some of the female members here on PC. Hopefully some of them will yet see your post & reply. From what you wrote, it sounds as though your gf is simply sensitive to feeling as though she's being put in any type of "spotlight" or perhaps to perceived criticism. It may not seem to you as though that is what is happening. But it may feel that way to her.

So, from my perspective, I think you simply have to be sensitive to her concerns & strive to avoid putting her in that type of situation. It would be helpful if the two of you could talk about this so that you can develop an understanding of how she feels & thus do a better job of not making her feel embarrassed. However your gf may or may not feel comfortable doing that. And you, for your part, can't make that conversation happen.

There is such a thing as a " highly sensitive person." Perhaps this might describe your gf. Here are links to some articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that talk about it:

Anyway... those are my thoughts with regard to your post. I wish you both well...
Speak only if you can improve upon the silence.
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Old 04-11-2018, 07:10 AM   #3
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Maybe you just need to give her a bit more space in certain situations, let her do her own thing. Offer advice and what have you but not crowd her, so to speak. Especially if she feels a little nervous or self conscious around people she doesn't know, like at the gym.

Anyway, welcome Scoobysnacks.
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Old 04-11-2018, 07:40 AM   #4
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Anger is often a cover for or defense against other emotions, such as embarrassment.
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