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Old 04-05-2018, 09:33 PM #1
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Default Why am I so weird?

At first, I thought that I may have Aspergers (which I ruled out..mostly), then I thought it may be anxiety related.. but I have so many odd habits that I wish would just go away.

Social situations are a huge problem. 1 being that I tend to avoid people I meet before even getting to know them. I also have issues talking a lot of the time. I stumble a lot, my thoughts get cut short, my words slur, or the words that come out donít come out right (weird tone, volume, etc). I also might have palilalia (?)

In relation to that, I tend to think back on conversations a lot. Which would be okay, but it leads to outbursts, and often weird facial expressions or body movements. Or I start mumbling the same phrase over and over. And itís involuntary. Sometimes I even unknowingly stop what Iím doing completely and think about it b

Iíve had social problems all my life really. Iíve never had mutual friendships, so they were always cut short. I tend to overshare, tell various white lies, or just come off too strongly. And I tend to have trouble with empathy. Or I just forget to read social cues because Iím focused on my thoughts, so I can say inappropriate things a lot.
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Old 04-06-2018, 12:01 AM #2
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

Do you have a therapist that you see regularly?
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Old 04-06-2018, 12:15 AM #3
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

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Originally Posted by graystreet View Post
Do you have a therapist that you see regularly?
No. Iíve recently been working on getting a neuropsych eval. I probably canít afford it though. If I donít have any luck with it, I think Iíll try to get a therapist in about a month (when i return home from college).
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Old 04-06-2018, 04:51 AM #4
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

Hi. In my opinion, social anxiety and it's underlying causes could account for the things you're experiencing and could also account for why your life is being shaped the way it is. I have pretty bad social anxiety and can identify to everything you mentioned and know exactly what it's like. Absolutely. I think there could be traits of OCD involved as well, but the social anxiety and underlying causes of social anxiety, are the main culprits - I believe. Hang in there, you can work your way through it.
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Old 04-06-2018, 07:23 AM #5
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

Here's my opinion,
You should just accept yourself and love yourself. Yeah, being weird can be uncomfortable a lot of the time, but it's ok to be weird.
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Old 04-06-2018, 09:38 AM #6
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

Quote:
Originally Posted by mote.of.soul View Post
Hi. In my opinion, social anxiety and it's underlying causes could account for the things you're experiencing and could also account for why your life is being shaped the way it is. I have pretty bad social anxiety and can identify to everything you mentioned and know exactly what it's like. Absolutely. I think there could be traits of OCD involved as well, but the social anxiety and underlying causes of social anxiety, are the main culprits - I believe. Hang in there, you can work your way through it.
Really? I'm glad someone could relate to it. It's really troubling and can be quite distracting, and embarrassing. Especially when I have an outburst, and someone sees it. It got bad since coming to college- probably because of the social aspect. Some mild OCD would make sense as well. I didn't consider it until a week ago. But in addition to my problems above, I also relate to 'compulsive Googling'- like an obsession with reassuring myself through things like googling my symptoms. I used to do it for hours at home; many times, I've actually spent an entire day doing it alone. :/ I didn't know it was a thing.

But I guess I've used my computer as an escape since childhood. It actually allowed me to become really tech savy. ^^'
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Old 04-06-2018, 07:53 PM #7
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

I know what you mean, and yes, you're right - it's a continual seeking of reassurance, which I understand. That could be related to self esteem, too. Don't worry, you're going to be okay.

I think if you look into and start practicing 'mindfulness' techniques, then you'll start to become more composed, self assured, so to speak, as a person. It's helped me in that respect. And just over time as you continue to address your issues, in whatever way you can, then you'll see good changes taking place. Personally, I still struggle in some areas but in others I've grown and changed and I'm happy about that. It's a journey.
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Old 04-07-2018, 08:28 AM #8
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ajisalone View Post
Social situations are a huge problem. 1 being that I tend to avoid people I meet before even getting to know them. I also have issues talking a lot of the time. I stumble a lot, my thoughts get cut short, my words slur, or the words that come out donít come out right (weird tone, volume, etc). I also might have palilalia (?)
First I don't think you are weird. We all have our own ways of being based on our experiences. It does sound like perhaps you don't have a lot of experience getting out there and dealing with people and frankly a lot of the issues might disappear if you got practice with people and you may need to force yourself. I got a lot better when I was forced.

I often try to avoid people. It is probably due to the fact that for most of my life people have NOT been anything but trouble. My boss hasn't had that experience in life so he is an extrovert. He gets excited to see and chat with people. But for me... 99% of conversations are unpleasant so.. I want to avoid that. It isn't weird.. it is just my experience.

For years now I have worked a somewhat public spokesman type of role. So I have a bit of an act that has formed. It is strange that the act is beloved by people and they want to get closer to me.. but I don't want that. And this hurts people's feelings as they feel they are being rejected. I so far.. don't know how to fix this...
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Old 04-07-2018, 10:59 AM #9
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emily Fox Seaton View Post
First I don't think you are weird. We all have our own ways of being based on our experiences. It does sound like perhaps you don't have a lot of experience getting out there and dealing with people and frankly a lot of the issues might disappear if you got practice with people and you may need to force yourself. I got a lot better when I was forced.

I often try to avoid people. It is probably due to the fact that for most of my life people have NOT been anything but trouble. My boss hasn't had that experience in life so he is an extrovert. He gets excited to see and chat with people. But for me... 99% of conversations are unpleasant so.. I want to avoid that. It isn't weird.. it is just my experience.

For years now I have worked a somewhat public spokesman type of role. So I have a bit of an act that has formed. It is strange that the act is beloved by people and they want to get closer to me.. but I don't want that. And this hurts people's feelings as they feel they are being rejected. I so far.. don't know how to fix this...
It's strange. When I was a child (around elementary to middle), I was rly annoying and 'outgoing', and a lot of the others didn't wanna be around me. Now I'm just this annoying person who always talks about how much they hate life, and doesn't even know how to conversate or deal with emotions properly. My sisters seemed to turn out fine, but I'm just the odd one. I actually used to follow my younger sister around, and looked up to her to show me how to do things. Idk. I feel like I was just born to not have close relationships with people.

But yeah. I feel like I've only had bad experiences with people as well. I find that when I'm talking to someone, and we get closer, I just get bored and completely forget about them. My supervisor is extroverted as well. But she got so annoyed by me, that she literally won't even look me in the eye anymore or talk to me unless necessary lol. Sometimes I don't understand what I even do anymore.
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Old 04-08-2018, 02:35 PM #10
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Default Re: Why am I so weird?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SorryShaped View Post
Here's my opinion,
You should just accept yourself and love yourself. Yeah, being weird can be uncomfortable a lot of the time, but it's ok to be weird.
SorryShaped is right. Weirdness can be a unique thing that adds to what makes you special. I'm weird and I am not ashamed.
I'm totally off my rocker, a total loony and I just don't care if that isn't ok. It's me and it's the way that I am.
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