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Old 02-16-2019, 02:55 PM   #11
nottrustin
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When I started therapy, I thought I was just angry and needed to vent to a stranger. What I found was that I had A LOT of other issues - LOL. And I dug deep and found a more authentic version of myself. I learned what I wanted and how to get it - in terms of my relationships; I cut people out that didn't serve a purpose in my growth - or didn't get it, and thus, inadvertently, hindered it. I learned to communicate better, listen better, pick up cues better. Most importantly, I learned to see a little bit of grey - instead of just black and white.
The thing that keeps me going is that I need a place to process things that I can't with real people in my life. She's been a sort of anchor when I start to spiral up or down - she's proven herself to be a helpful resource.
I suspect a lot of people in thinking it is on thing and will be quick. Only to find out the issues go much deeper.
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Old 02-16-2019, 02:56 PM   #12
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Great post idea. Thanks.

Well my biggest thing was learning to be ok with hugging someone I care about and not have shame over it.

I also learned some good skills for being more assertive. I eventually became ok with crying in front of people

Therapy was really helpful to me overall. Just sucks he left and it's over
I could have written the same post.
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Old 02-16-2019, 03:14 PM   #13
Cheryl27
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It's having that outlet for an hour without the fear of being judge and feeling the support has been the biggest benefit of being in therapy. Also being taught how to handle life stress as it comes and knowing i have my therapist to help me through the hard stuff and to learn how to handle things on my own baby steps
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Old 02-16-2019, 03:15 PM   #14
CharlieStarDust
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I suspect a lot of people in thinking it is on thing and will be quick. Only to find out the issues go much deeper.
Totally. It was a concern that I’d eventually uncover things I didn’t want to, and I expressed that in the beginning. Luckily, she’s pretty good at her job, and all the unfolding happened very organically.
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Old 02-16-2019, 03:20 PM   #15
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I suspect a lot of people in thinking it is on thing and will be quick. Only to find out the issues go much deeper.
I knew it wouldn’t be quick but it did take longer than even I thought it would. I just am so glad I had that support during some really difficult times.
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Old 02-16-2019, 03:21 PM   #16
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Over the years I have learned so much about not just myself but humans in general.

I went thinking I needed to just learn to grieve my mom. I needed help with parenting but feared being told I was a bad parent. I thought they were my only issues.

I learned:
I am my own worst enemy and judge myself any more than others do. I have a lot higher expectations for myself than I do for others. People dont jusge me as a horrible gross person because of my past
I am lovable. People do care about me. Hugging people can be comforting. The are people who do keep their word. Loving and having great memories of a person is totally worth the pain.
There are good therapists and bad.
It is okay to cut toxic people out of my life who are toxic even if they are family.
I am not responsible for other peoples happiness.
I am a good mom who raised amazing children.

I am still on therapy because I enjoy having somebody to help me process life. Who I dont have to worry about judging me and understands me. I also hold out hope that I will get to the point where all those things I have learned actually sticks and that my past will no longer have such a hold over me.
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Old 02-16-2019, 03:41 PM   #17
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Another part was he very much encouraged me to ask for what I want, and I did, often (with him I got so comfortable, it became easy no matter how out there it was) but now I'm finding myself being more bold in this type of stuff. Even at my surgery, I was outright asking the nurses and doctors things and telling them No for some things.
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Old 02-16-2019, 07:56 PM   #18
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I have gained a lot more confidence and openness in my ways of relating to other people. I'm a lot less scared to try new things in general. I've also been able to find new career goals and made a lot of progress in that direction, which I don't think I could have done as well without therapy to help me talk out what I want to do (or don't want to do) and why.
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Old 02-16-2019, 10:16 PM   #19
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An immense hope crossed my fear.
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Old 02-20-2019, 10:43 AM   #20
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I had dinner with my son and daughter-in-law last night, and she brought up her own therapy. She survived a very mentally ill and abusive mother as well as a distant and largely absent father. Additionally, she deals with Hashimoto's and constant exhaustion that goes with that disease. She was saying how much she feels she's progressed in getting through her complicated relationships with her parents. She has found having a therapist to bounce off of and talk these things through has helped her find more personal balance and inner calm. She's seeing progress and is really proud of herself.
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