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Unread 05-19-2017, 07:54 PM   #661
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How ya doing, Jdna?
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Unread 05-19-2017, 07:56 PM   #662
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How ya doing, Jdna?
Doing okay. I feel pretty numb like no emotions. My friend asked if i was excited about going to the park. I mean i was looking forward to it but i did not feel excitement. I don't think i feel things anymore. But besides that i am fine haha
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Unread 05-19-2017, 07:58 PM   #663
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(((Jdna)))
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Unread 05-19-2017, 08:39 PM   #664
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Hey LT-sorry you had a panic attack While anxiety and I are no strangers, I feel very thankful I've never had one. Why would your H be disappointed in you? It's not like it is your fault! Plus yoga is for YOU, so he has nothing to be disappointed in (in my opinion).
Thanks, Velcro. I have panic disorder (plus generalized anxiety), so it happens... I wouldn't recommend a panic attack--not fun! I think H seemed so happy that I did yoga last weekend that I thought he'd be disappointed in me if I bailed this week. Especially because he goes to the gym regularly. But he turned out to be really understanding. And said if I did yoga at home, that counts, too.

Can you tell I'm used to trying to fit other people's expectations for me? Worried about my T being disappointed, too, since she seemed excited that I went last week. But you're right, that it's for me, and I suspect walking into yoga feeling totally panicked wouldn't work so well...Sometimes taking care of myself means holing up at home.
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Unread 05-19-2017, 08:48 PM   #665
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I had a meltdown at the amusement park. So many people and loud noises... And extreme heat.. I cried a little and my friend grabbed my hand and led me out
Sorry you had to deal with that--good of your friend to guide you out instead of pressuring you to stay. I dislike amusement parks and try to avoid them. I struggle in the heat, too. I think getting in my hot car today is part of what triggered my panic attack.

Are you feeling better now?
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Unread 05-19-2017, 09:06 PM   #666
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Oh my innocent daughter (who gave me this cold, and every other illness she ever had) brought me a Kleenex and said "I don't think I was as sick as you, mom, I never had a headache and I slept just fine!" She also recovered on day 3. Grrrrr. I love her but I should really invest in a hazmat suit!
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Unread 05-19-2017, 09:46 PM   #667
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Oh my innocent daughter (who gave me this cold, and every other illness she ever had) brought me a Kleenex and said "I don't think I was as sick as you, mom, I never had a headache and I slept just fine!" She also recovered on day 3. Grrrrr. I love her but I should really invest in a hazmat suit!
you should just work with toddlers all day every day and be immune to everything

It was so funny because I was at a house today where two people had colds and were saying how they were quarantined at practice (roller derby, so lots of contact), and they sat apart from everyone...and the whole time I am thinking "My god guys, IT IS A COLD! I wipe snot from children's faces all day long...and that is the least gross thing i do!"
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Unread 05-19-2017, 10:58 PM   #668
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You would think after public school myself, daycare and public school for two kids, and all my past jobs in retail, I would have an iron constitution. Unfortunately for me this is not the case. Maybe 4th grade will be healthy!
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Unread 05-19-2017, 11:29 PM   #669
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Hi couchies... I made an observation this morning...my defense mechanism of isolating does not help me elevate my feeling that I am an intrusion on others and not wanted.

I know pretty obvious, still a dumb duh moment for me. I already fight it (the isolating behaviors) the best I can. Still, I'm not doing myself any favors slipping into that behavior, rather than tackling head on whatever is leading me to want to isolate in the first place.
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Unread 05-20-2017, 01:07 AM   #670
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Hi couchies... I made an observation this morning...my defense mechanism of isolating does not help me elevate my feeling that I am an intrusion on others and not wanted.



I know pretty obvious, still a dumb duh moment for me. I already fight it (the isolating behaviors) the best I can. Still, I'm not doing myself any favors slipping into that behavior, rather than tackling head on whatever is leading me to want to isolate in the first place.


Don't feel dumb. I know that about myself, but I can't say that I've thought about it in that way before. My problem is that I don't have a lot of friends, so it's incredibly easy to slip into the isolation. No one is asking me to come out, so why bother making the effort to?

Depressing for this early in the morning, I know. Sorry.

Elio, I think that recognition about isolation is a wonderful tool. Perhaps the next step now is to find small ways to fight against it. Small baby steps into integration. Cheering for you
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