Found out my Dad was a monster. Much worse than I thought - Forums at Psych Central


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Old 03-11-2019, 07:33 PM #1
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Trig Found out my Dad was a monster. Much worse than I thought

Im feeling hopeless, not sure what is happening. I found out a few days ago that my dad was a
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He has been dead a while now but finding this out has completely rocked my world. I am holding on by a thread and feel like Im going to have a nervous breakdown

Last edited by bluekoi; 03-11-2019 at 07:36 PM. Reason: Add triggger icon. Apply trigger code.
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Old 03-11-2019, 08:11 PM #2
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Heart Re: Found out my Dad was a monster. Much worse than I thought

Hello Ckotrady: Thank you for bringing your concern here to PC. I noticed this is your first post. So... welcome to Psych Central.

I'm sorry you are having to deal with such difficult information. I can only imagine what this must be like for you. I guess the only thing I can offer with regard to this is that the person your father was does not affect the person you are.

I don't know if you've considered talking this through with a counselor or therapist. Sometimes having the opportunity to talk things through at-length & in-depth with an objective person can be helpful. At least from my perspective, I think the thing you probably don't want to do is to keep how you're feeling bottled up inside. That can be a prescription for ongoing sadness in my experience.

Coming here to PC can certainly be of help too. There are lots of caring, compassionate members here. So please do keep posting. I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:33 PM #3
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Default Re: Found out my Dad was a monster. Much worse than I thought

(((Ckotrady3))),

Welcome to the PC forums. I am so sorry you are finding this out about your father, it's something that anyone would find very hard to process and deal with. Please know that what ever your father did has nothing to do with you other than you are related to him.

Take it slow and do your best to talk this out so you can process it and continue to have your own life despite that bad path your father chose to take in his life.
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Old 03-12-2019, 11:45 PM #4
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Default Re: Found out my Dad was a monster. Much worse than I thought

Hello Ckotrady3. I am so sorry to hear of your truth. How disturbing and frightening for you! I know you are traumatized and currently in shock but do you have a sense of what could bring you comfort? Of course, nothing can change the information but what do you suppose could help you to move forward? Sometimes we know what we need when we reflect.

I agree with the comments and suggestions of Skeezyks and Open Eyes.

Again, I am so sorry for your anguish Perhaps continuing to post and share on PC could help?
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Old 03-18-2019, 01:36 PM #5
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Default Re: Found out my Dad was a monster. Much worse than I thought

I am sorry that you learned of this. it couldn't have been easy.

my father was an evil SOB. very much so. acted on his beliefs in a very public manner. I was not alive when he did all of this..but was I was around when survivors would come around and curse him out, spit and wish him (and us ) dead. as a child I never made the connection, that didn't come un til much later.

now it is just part of my history. something he opted to do, not me. if anything it gave me guidance on how I wanted to be, how I wanted to live. his actions are not my actions. I have no worries of becoming him.

perhaps take that into your heart. what he did was his choice. not yours. even the worst on earth have parents and kids. you said he has been dead some time, which is i'm assuming good. my advice...find something that can become your passion. make a name for YOU. be it rescuing dogs, painting, making the best cupcakes, what ever calls to you, but do it the best you are able to..and be PROUD.

therapy would be nice. because some day someone will say.."hey is your father....." prepare a stock answer. yes he was & that's enough. end of story.

like I've said don't let their story become your story. life is too short to be trapped into that. fight until you find your path & then wander and enjoy!
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