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Old 01-12-2019, 05:51 PM   #11
aq2169
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Yes i knew him, spoke to him, but not well. I usually jist try to keep to myself and hide my crazy. But i been here 2 years , they have already seen it, lol.
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Old 01-22-2019, 12:13 AM   #12
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Well - coming from someone who used to self injure in areas that others would not be able to avoid seeing .. I can guess the public display was he/she felt their cries for help were being ignored or outright shoved back at them to the point he/she knew talking was not an option. I chose self injury as my outlet in those days .. I also attempted a few times, but it was my self injuries that were public my attempts I tried to keep "semi-private". So basically .. it was the person speaking in the only way they knew how anymore
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I am sorry you found the person though. I can only imagine the effect that has on you. ❤
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Old 01-22-2019, 05:04 AM   #13
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I guess your right, but i just cud have done without the additional trauma. I mean how much can a person take. I know he was hurting i just wished he cud have talked to someone. Itsjust such a tragic thing. When i have been suicidal in the past, I just wanted to take a handful of pills and locked my door and go to sleep and never wake up. I felt no need for public display . I think men and women are different in that way. Women think about the mess and the people that are left behind.
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Old 01-22-2019, 05:52 AM   #14
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I guess your right, but i just cud have done without the additional trauma. I mean how much can a person take. I know he was hurting i just wished he cud have talked to someone. Itsjust such a tragic thing. When i have been suicidal in the past, I just wanted to take a handful of pills and locked my door and go to sleep and never wake up. I felt no need for public display . I think men and women are different in that way. Women think about the mess and the people that are left behind.
I am female too, and that was actually how I did the majority of my attempts too, but bc I went thru 20yrs of people telling me "oh don't worry about it", "everybody has problems, don't be such an attention seeker", "your problems aren't really that bad I don't know why you think they are", etc when I would tell them I
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or ask where I could get help or ask if I could talk to them - I can understand if he felt like he had no way of speaking to anyone. The way I spoke was
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but after awhile even that did not work and I didn't know what to do. So I don't know if that's what he went through or not but if he did, that may have been his thinking ...

I know it will leave a horrendous memory in your mind though. For that, I am sorry. *hugs*
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Old 01-23-2019, 11:17 AM   #15
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Thank you, your so sweet. I am struggling as always with a personal relationship. Acting like a raving lunatic, i dont even recognize, lol.... cant stop my crazy behavior, its worse since this happened.
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Old 01-23-2019, 11:59 AM   #16
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You aren't acting like a raving lunatic. You are hurting and still reeling (understandably) from what you saw. That isn't going to just go away in a day or two or even a week or two. It will take awhile. Go easy on yourself ❤
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Old 01-25-2019, 12:28 PM   #17
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Wish everyone was as understanding as you. Thank you sooo much!!
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Old 01-25-2019, 12:40 PM   #18
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Wish everyone was as understanding as you. Thank you sooo much!!
You're welcome.
*hugs*
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Old 01-25-2019, 07:11 PM   #19
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Do you have a therapist you can talk through & process this suicide trauma with? I found it helps to have a professional who knows how to help to get me through traumatic things.

Definitely a horrible experience for you when already having struggles
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