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Old 01-09-2019, 03:37 PM   #1
Amethyst_Stargazer
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Default This has been a rough week~got triggered~

I met somebody new and they triggered me, simply by treating me how my ex boyfriend did. I didn't see any red flags or warning signs before hand. We were talking, having a blast talking and getting close to one another. Over the course of getting to know him, things just blew up in my face. He started getting short with me, having a temper, making me feel as if I did something wrong~ when I know I didn't and simply treating me poorly. When I mentioned how he was treating me, he was being unreasonable and made it worse by getting angry at me. In the end, I stopped speaking to him because I realized what was going on.

I sobbed on the bed, felt huge anxiety and shaking and felt sick to my stomach by the way he was treating me and speaking to me. He was very demanding and cold towards me and I didn't do anything to hurt him. I let my guard down because I'm focusing on healing and now I know I need to be a little bit more careful when it comes to people and who I accept into my life. This was simply one person who I met who has done this to me. The rest of my friends respect my boundaries and we have no issues speaking to one another. He however triggered me the entire time. By the way he was speaking to me and being demanding. He reminded me a lot of my ex and all I can say now is that I'm glad he's out of my life now.

I'm feeling a lot happier today. That's very good. Considering the last three days or so, I felt sick to my stomach and had horrible anxiety. Thanks to those who's reading this and supporting me. Sometimes you just have to be careful who you speak too, overtime they will reveal their true colors. The moment someone treats me unfairly again, I'm not even going to try to speak with them, I'll just block. Talking with Abusers is nearly impossible and exhausting. And I'm sure others can relate with me.
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Old 01-09-2019, 05:15 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amethyst_Stargazer View Post
I met somebody new and they triggered me, simply by treating me how my ex boyfriend did. I didn't see any red flags or warning signs before hand. We were talking, having a blast talking and getting close to one another. Over the course of getting to know him, things just blew up in my face. He started getting short with me, having a temper, making me feel as if I did something wrong~ when I know I didn't and simply treating me poorly. When I mentioned how he was treating me, he was being unreasonable and made it worse by getting angry at me. In the end, I stopped speaking to him because I realized what was going on.

I sobbed on the bed, felt huge anxiety and shaking and felt sick to my stomach by the way he was treating me and speaking to me. He was very demanding and cold towards me and I didn't do anything to hurt him. I let my guard down because I'm focusing on healing and now I know I need to be a little bit more careful when it comes to people and who I accept into my life. This was simply one person who I met who has done this to me. The rest of my friends respect my boundaries and we have no issues speaking to one another. He however triggered me the entire time. By the way he was speaking to me and being demanding. He reminded me a lot of my ex and all I can say now is that I'm glad he's out of my life now.

I'm feeling a lot happier today. That's very good. Considering the last three days or so, I felt sick to my stomach and had horrible anxiety. Thanks to those who's reading this and supporting me. Sometimes you just have to be careful who you speak too, overtime they will reveal their true colors. The moment someone treats me unfairly again, I'm not even going to try to speak with them, I'll just block. Talking with Abusers is nearly impossible and exhausting. And I'm sure others can relate with me.
Good for you to realize you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect! It sucks to let yourself be open and accepting to another person and realize that they're not open to you in return. Don't let it stop you from taking the risk, because there are plenty of good people out there to share your unique self with!
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Old 01-21-2019, 12:46 PM   #3
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Default Re: This has been a rough week~got triggered~

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amethyst_Stargazer View Post
I met somebody new and they triggered me, simply by treating me how my ex boyfriend did. I didn't see any red flags or warning signs before hand. We were talking, having a blast talking and getting close to one another. Over the course of getting to know him, things just blew up in my face. He started getting short with me, having a temper, making me feel as if I did something wrong~ when I know I didn't and simply treating me poorly. When I mentioned how he was treating me, he was being unreasonable and made it worse by getting angry at me. In the end, I stopped speaking to him because I realized what was going on.

I sobbed on the bed, felt huge anxiety and shaking and felt sick to my stomach by the way he was treating me and speaking to me. He was very demanding and cold towards me and I didn't do anything to hurt him. I let my guard down because I'm focusing on healing and now I know I need to be a little bit more careful when it comes to people and who I accept into my life. This was simply one person who I met who has done this to me. The rest of my friends respect my boundaries and we have no issues speaking to one another. He however triggered me the entire time. By the way he was speaking to me and being demanding. He reminded me a lot of my ex and all I can say now is that I'm glad he's out of my life now.

I'm feeling a lot happier today. That's very good. Considering the last three days or so, I felt sick to my stomach and had horrible anxiety. Thanks to those who's reading this and supporting me. Sometimes you just have to be careful who you speak too, overtime they will reveal their true colors. The moment someone treats me unfairly again, I'm not even going to try to speak with them, I'll just block. Talking with Abusers is nearly impossible and exhausting. And I'm sure others can relate with me.
I am SOOO glad I just saw your post-if you are interested you can read mine under CARETAKER HAS PTSD AND ELDERLY PARENT RAISED VOICE. Iím going through exactly what you are but with my mother. Because I vowed to myself that I would never allow someone to verbally abuse me again, which I havenít the last 2 years, it is now VERY CONFUSING AND DIFFICULT to keep this promise because I drive my parents, and my 88 year old mother is starting her a busive ways towards me now that she is feeling scared and out of control.

I feel like Iím back in my abusive work situations where I had to take the abuse if I wanted to get a paycheck and survive. Because now she and my father support my living and therapy sessions. When I stood up to her, the next day they told me to decrease my therapy sessions and my mother has held a grudge since. I feel stuck-hv boundaries & things will be taken away. Try to ignore-impossible for someone with PTSD.

You did the right thing by ending it with the guy. I had to do the same recently with a lifelong friend who started being abusive with me-she had really stopped being a real friend the last 10 years, so the abuse made the reality quite clear. Thx for sharing and listening.
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Old 01-22-2019, 04:46 AM   #4
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Are you in therapy or do you take any medication?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amethyst_Stargazer View Post
I met somebody new and they triggered me, simply by treating me how my ex boyfriend did. I didn't see any red flags or warning signs before hand. We were talking, having a blast talking and getting close to one another. Over the course of getting to know him, things just blew up in my face. He started getting short with me, having a temper, making me feel as if I did something wrong~ when I know I didn't and simply treating me poorly. When I mentioned how he was treating me, he was being unreasonable and made it worse by getting angry at me. In the end, I stopped speaking to him because I realized what was going on.

I sobbed on the bed, felt huge anxiety and shaking and felt sick to my stomach by the way he was treating me and speaking to me. He was very demanding and cold towards me and I didn't do anything to hurt him. I let my guard down because I'm focusing on healing and now I know I need to be a little bit more careful when it comes to people and who I accept into my life. This was simply one person who I met who has done this to me. The rest of my friends respect my boundaries and we have no issues speaking to one another. He however triggered me the entire time. By the way he was speaking to me and being demanding. He reminded me a lot of my ex and all I can say now is that I'm glad he's out of my life now.

I'm feeling a lot happier today. That's very good. Considering the last three days or so, I felt sick to my stomach and had horrible anxiety. Thanks to those who's reading this and supporting me. Sometimes you just have to be careful who you speak too, overtime they will reveal their true colors. The moment someone treats me unfairly again, I'm not even going to try to speak with them, I'll just block. Talking with Abusers is nearly impossible and exhausting. And I'm sure others can relate with me.
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Old 01-31-2019, 07:14 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amethyst_Stargazer View Post
I met somebody new and they triggered me, simply by treating me how my ex boyfriend did. I didn't see any red flags or warning signs before hand. We were talking, having a blast talking and getting close to one another. Over the course of getting to know him, things just blew up in my face. He started getting short with me, having a temper, making me feel as if I did something wrong~ when I know I didn't and simply treating me poorly. When I mentioned how he was treating me, he was being unreasonable and made it worse by getting angry at me. In the end, I stopped speaking to him because I realized what was going on.

I sobbed on the bed, felt huge anxiety and shaking and felt sick to my stomach by the way he was treating me and speaking to me. He was very demanding and cold towards me and I didn't do anything to hurt him. I let my guard down because I'm focusing on healing and now I know I need to be a little bit more careful when it comes to people and who I accept into my life. This was simply one person who I met who has done this to me. The rest of my friends respect my boundaries and we have no issues speaking to one another. He however triggered me the entire time. By the way he was speaking to me and being demanding. He reminded me a lot of my ex and all I can say now is that I'm glad he's out of my life now.

I'm feeling a lot happier today. That's very good. Considering the last three days or so, I felt sick to my stomach and had horrible anxiety. Thanks to those who's reading this and supporting me. Sometimes you just have to be careful who you speak too, overtime they will reveal their true colors. The moment someone treats me unfairly again, I'm not even going to try to speak with them, I'll just block. Talking with Abusers is nearly impossible and exhausting. And I'm sure others can relate with me.

A word that really stands out in a really positive way is boundaries! It is so important to have them. You don't need to explain a word. to anyone... just say "no thanks" and walk away. The more you practice, the more empowered you feel, the more empowered you feel the easier it is to just walk away. Value yourself
you are amazing you are strong you are worth it. No one can change that. You hold the key
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Old 02-03-2019, 01:34 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amethyst_Stargazer View Post
I Sometimes you just have to be careful who you speak too, overtime they will reveal their true colors. The moment someone treats me unfairly again, I'm not even going to try to speak with them, I'll just block. Talking with Abusers is nearly impossible and exhausting. And I'm sure others can relate with me.
This is EXACTLY what keeps happening to me! I am so sorry that you have to go through this. We have an impeccable ability to detect abuse and when we do, we have to listen to it. Our gut has been trained to detect danger because danger has been prevalent in our lives. This is something we mistakenly disregard as, "hyper-vigilance," or, "paranoia," when it actual fact it is a survival instinct and extemely valuable information.

Abusers are everywhere. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who doesn't abuse. It is a horrible and lonely feeling to know that so much psychopathy and sociopathy and narcissism exists around us and we just desperately need someone who is NOT that way.

Certainly, we can be wrong about someone, but when they trigger us this bad, it is wise to take time away and process what happened. I know I have fine-tuned by hypervigilance so that I can determine if it is a red flag, yellow flag or green flag. These things are absolutely necessary to healing. Trust your gut - people like are are human lie detectors because we are always looking for signs of mistrust or potential abuse.

Any letting your guard down is okay. It means you are healing, but the good news is you still detected it. Some people remain oblivious to the red flags until it is too late.

Thanks,
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Old 02-05-2019, 09:48 PM   #7
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I am sorry for all posters who can relate to this challenge, I have myself been going through a lot and it's been so bad lately that I have experienced many debilitating triggers. When I get triggered bad enough I end up struggling for several days and can be very sensitive.

I try to distance from anyone that gets loud towards me. I have experienced too many toxic rages towards me that I get very triggered.

Quote:
You don't need to explain a word. to anyone... just say "no thanks" and walk away.
I have had to do this a LOT, especially lately. I don't even have the energy to explain what I have just experienced. It's just been extremely toxic.
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