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Old 11-13-2017, 11:22 AM   #1
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Trig Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

I didn't know where to put this, sorry.

Long story short, back in April I made a post here on PC about being disappointed that a friend of mine didn't cut herself deeper. She had asked for "tips", I had told her some stuff she could do, but she still didn't cut deep.

Fast forward until last wednesday; things went out of hand and I simply couldn't deal with talking to people for a while, so I stopped talking to my friends. I told them all, including her, that I needed a break.

Then, a few days ago, she sends me messages begging me to start talking to her again. I don't answer her. A few hours later, she sends me pictures of what she had done to herself. Finally she had cut deeper. She asked me what I thought of it, if it was good enough, stuff like that. I still didn't answer.

I still haven't talked to her, but I found her posts on another forum. Apparently she went to the hospital and got 15 stitches. If she had asked me, I would've told her to not bother getting stitches because it really wasn't that big.

And for some reason, I'm just really angry at her. I hate that she didn't cut deeper. I hate that she went to the ER with that cut. I realize this makes me a bad friend, so for now I'm just staying away from her.

I recognize that I shouldn't feel this way. I shouldn't want her to hurt herself worse. But I do. I don't feel sorry for her at all, just angry. If she were here, I'm not sure I could've controlled myself, I think I might've hurt her. Luckily for me, she's very far away.

I don't understand why I am this way. I feel like a normal person, but sometimes I just do these things that I recognize as wrong, yet I never feel bad about it. I'm curious as to why I'm like this. Is something wrong with me? Or are most people like this, they're just way better at hiding it?

Anyone... relate? Or... I don't know, any thoughts?
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Old 11-13-2017, 12:00 PM   #2
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

Your right, it's wrong. My thoughts, that you talk to a therapist about this.
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Old 11-13-2017, 12:14 PM   #3
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

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Originally Posted by Nammu View Post
Your right, it's wrong. My thoughts, that you talk to a therapist about this.
I've tried, but it's like they don't understand what I'm telling them.

Also a lot of the stuff I've done have been online (most of my conversations with her, for example, have been online or over phone/text), it seems kinda silly to talk about online stuff with a therapist?
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Old 11-13-2017, 12:22 PM   #4
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

It's a serious thing, K. Make them listen. You wanted to physically hurt someone. A friend.
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Old 11-13-2017, 12:25 PM   #5
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

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Originally Posted by Purple,Violet,Blue View Post
It's a serious thing, K. Make them listen. You wanted to physically hurt someone. A friend.
Wait, is that a big deal? Is that a bigger deal than the other stuff? I'm asking because I didn't think so.
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Old 11-13-2017, 12:28 PM   #6
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

Yes, it's a big deal.
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Old 11-13-2017, 12:30 PM   #7
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

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Yes, it's a big deal.
You sure? Doesn't everyone feel like that from time to time? I mean, people get into fights all the time. Doesn't seem like a big deal to me.
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Old 11-13-2017, 01:16 PM   #8
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

People do fight and get furious and say, "I could have strangled her." But that's a long way from actually hurting them. The first is a figure of speech, to express momentary anger. You don't seem to be describing that.
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Old 11-13-2017, 01:31 PM   #9
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

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Originally Posted by Purple,Violet,Blue View Post
People do fight and get furious and say, "I could have strangled her." But that's a long way from actually hurting them. The first is a figure of speech, to express momentary anger. You don't seem to be describing that.
Hm, I see your point.
What about the other stuff?
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Old 11-13-2017, 01:51 PM   #10
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Default Re: Angry at friend for not hurting herself worse

I don't know enough about the situation to say.

It's not exactly a healthy thing to do, inciting someone to damage themselves.

Had this person done anything to make you so angry?
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