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Old 08-20-2012, 05:47 AM   #11
Nana E
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Hi, Doc John'
I just found out My Husband of 30 years has Passive Aggressive Syndrome. I have BPD.
I can't really find info on Passive Aggressive Syndrome, could you please help me out with any links, books etc?
Maybe I am not searching in the right places. BPD is under personality Disorders, but where do I find passive aggressive syndrome?
Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Also is their medications to help passive aggressive syndrome?
Thanks in advance!
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Old 10-01-2012, 12:17 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DocJohn View Post
If you're someone who's in a current relationship with someone who has a personality disorder, or someone who's had a past relationship with them, this is a forum to share experience, coping tips, and more.

Please keep in mind -- we're a place for mental health support. Be respectful when discussing these issues and try not to generalize.

DocJohn
I'm in a kind of a strange place, I have been diagnosed with BPD and am married to a person with Aspergers Syndrome. Ummmmmm HELP????
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Old 10-18-2012, 09:27 AM   #13
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Hi Dr John. My husband suffers with depression and at times closes down totally. There is very little support for partners of people suffering with depression. It would be nice to find other people who understand situation.
i am not one hundred percent sure how this forum works technically so if the wrong word lands up on the wrong line please excuse me. i firstly want to say that you are certainly not the only person in a relationship with someone who suffers from depression. as many people as there are in the world who suffer with depression, there are those plus several who have close dealings with them and all those in the person's life feel the same sort of hurt, frustration and pain you experience. i too am one of those people as my husband has been suffering from depression for most of my married life and i have a 16 year old daughter who also suffers from depression. there is just one piece of advice that i can offer you. it is rather profound and hard to intergrade but once it is in your heart, your life will be so much easier. recognize the depression as any illness. it is really like diabeties-it flares up when you least want it to and it is totally unpredictable but it is not personal. if your spouse were having a heart attack you would not be insulted that he was unable to take you out to a movie. having a "depression attack" is no different. people do not want to be depressed. people do not want to be dependent. the ill person is ill and there is no choice about it. that is not to say that you are not entitled to be considered, but be sympathetic. anyway...i have to go...good luck and as the late michael jackson used to say..."you are not alone"!
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Old 10-31-2012, 02:49 PM   #14
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Hi, this is my first post. I am in a relationship with a boyfriend who has been diagnosed with PTSD due to traumatic experiences in Vietman while he was serving in the military. However, from some of the life events he has shared, I now feel it is more than Vietnam. It must go back to childhood and his ability to cope well with interpersonal relationships. I have not brought this up to him, and wonder what the best language is. ?? I am certain after perusing your site and many others, that he is suffering from PTSD and/or BPD. He is in his 4th year of sobriety with the help of AA. I notice that he applies techniques to help him subdue his emotions/anger/frustrations. He becomes very quiet and then goes to lay down and rest, which is good; however, at first it was difficult for me to grasp. We have only known each other 3 months, but he became overly "SERIOUS" and in love with me after only 3 weeks. I enjoyed that part of course, but now I realize it was because of his disorder. All the symptoms of BPD are present. I want him to know that I am trying to understand, and that I am willing to communicate with him; however, I don't know the best way to begin this conversation. I don't want to "accuse" him of anything...he is a lovely gentleman, and very caring; plus he is trying very hard, but I can see that the issue of non-communication will drown this relationship over time. I also saw the book, "Walking on Eggshells," on his book shelf which I think his former wife probably utilized. I love him and want to help, but then again, I might just make matters worse, not sure. I would greatly appreciate any suggestions and/or advice in this serious matter. Thank you.
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Old 02-05-2013, 10:31 PM   #15
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Wow do I need this. What about a an ex-wife of a recently deceased NPD who left a mess behind along with an NPD son who is wreaking havoc? My life story. I am in so much pain so much of the time.

Oh yeah and an NPD mother in law for 25 years who often made my life hell PLUS a few of my ex's siblings. What a mess.

Good news: Two of my kids are okay. They seem healthy. They still love me no matter what the crazies are saying. It's going to be okay, I think.

Last edited by anthromom; 02-05-2013 at 11:51 PM..
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Old 03-24-2013, 08:39 PM   #16
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Hi, I'm new to this website. I'm here due to my partner who suffers from depression. We have been together 3 years, but I really don't know what to do at all.
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Old 03-29-2013, 02:45 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kimber1 View Post
Hi Dr John. My husband suffers with depression and at times closes down totally. There is very little support for partners of people suffering with depression. It would be nice to find other people who understand situation.
Hi Kimber1
My husband suffers with depression but couldn't say the word (17 yrs & counting) until recently. He's taken us to hell between this, A.D.D. & using these conditions now as excuses for bad behavior.
It is hard. I empathize with you completely.
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Old 03-29-2013, 02:51 AM   #18
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Hi, I'm new to this website. I'm here due to my partner who suffers from depression. We have been together 3 years, but I really don't know what to do at all.
Take care of you first. Talk about it if that is possible. Your partner may be relieved that you want to help.
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Old 03-29-2013, 03:05 AM   #19
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libea~
Aw! Thanks for the song by Michael J to put in my head. Now I can go to sleep....
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Old 03-29-2013, 01:50 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DocJohn View Post
If you're someone who's in a current relationship with someone who has a personality disorder, or someone who's had a past relationship with them, this is a forum to share experience, coping tips, and more.

Please keep in mind -- we're a place for mental health support. Be respectful when discussing these issues and try not to generalize.

DocJohn
Hi DocJohn ~ My ADD/Depressed partner refuses to get help, & wants to stay in the same unhealthy, destructive loop our marriage has always been in.
I am the accommodating one here & it has set us on a course that feeds into itself like a mother eating its' young.
The good news is I can see it for what it is now, where as before I only struggled on in the wake of broken promises/manipulation & misdirection, not knowing what was going on.

I feel only despair, as he takes us down, emotionally, spiritually, financially.

My cleanup crew mentality has ended with my own post traumatic headache syndrome that is a never ending, mind numbing pain in my head.

He is visibly afraid as he sees he will have to step up & be responsible for his own behavior/mistakes. I can't fix them anymore.

I live in fear of what the future will bring. I need a little encouragement. Today is not one of my good days. Is there a kind word out there...?
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