Psych Central

Go Back   Forums at Psych Central > >



advertisement
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 10-01-2018, 06:53 AM   #1
Optimistic01
Newly Joined
Optimistic01 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: New Berlin, NY
Posts: 1
Frown I think my boyfriend suffers from BPD

A year ago yesterday I got engaged only to break it off a month and a half later. Since then we've been on again, off again trying to work things out. One minute he loves and adores me and the next I'm being called evil, being accused of being unfaithful and at times called cruel names. My words get twisted during these episodes to the point where I no longer want to speak up for myself and then almost as unassumingly as these episodes appear they disappear and the person I fell in love returns. I've done a lot of reading and research because I believe he's a good person deep inside and I believe he has borderline personality disorder. I've tried tip toeing around my belief so as to not upset him or cause an episode and to be honest I don't think he realizes something is wrong. I'm writing out of hope someone else has or is experiencing this very thing and can perhaps shed some light. I'm clinging on to hope but it dwindles by the moment as I just don't know how much more I can take. It's heartbreaking.
Optimistic01 is offline   Reply With Quote

advertisement
Old 10-02-2018, 01:44 PM   #2
Skeezyks
Apparition
 
Skeezyks's Avatar
Skeezyks has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: L'Etoile du Nord
Posts: 16,885 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood: I think my boyfriend suffers from BPD

3 yr Member
12.6k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Smile Re: I think my boyfriend suffers from BPD

Hello Optimistic: I'm not the member you're looking for here on PC. But I noticed this is your first post & you had not yet been greeted. So... welcome to PsychCentral.

One other forum, here on PC, that may be of interest (& where you might also consider posting with regard to this) would be the relationships & communication forum. Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/rela...communication/

And then here are links to 9 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that hopefully may be of interest. The first 7 are on the subject of BPD. The last two discuss how to persuade a loved one to seek professional help & how to help a loved one who is in denial:

Living with Borderline Personality Disorder

How to Help a Loved One with Borderline Personality Disorder, Part 1

How to Help a Loved One with Borderline Personality Disorder, Part 2

Living with & Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/careg...e-personality/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/6-gift...lity-disorder/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/an-over...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...essional-help/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/11-way...-denial/?all=1

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
Skeezyks is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-02-2018, 04:33 PM   #3
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 78,100 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
49.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: I think my boyfriend suffers from BPD

Welcome to pc
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-03-2018, 12:10 AM   #4
BDPpartner
Veteran Member
 
BDPpartner's Avatar
BDPpartner has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Posts: 607
My Mood: I think my boyfriend suffers from BPD

5 yr Member
85 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: I think my boyfriend suffers from BPD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Optimistic01 View Post
A year ago yesterday I got engaged only to break it off a month and a half later. Since then we've been on again, off again trying to work things out. One minute he loves and adores me and the next I'm being called evil, being accused of being unfaithful and at times called cruel names. My words get twisted during these episodes to the point where I no longer want to speak up for myself and then almost as unassumingly as these episodes appear they disappear and the person I fell in love returns. I've done a lot of reading and research because I believe he's a good person deep inside and I believe he has borderline personality disorder. I've tried tip toeing around my belief so as to not upset him or cause an episode and to be honest I don't think he realizes something is wrong. I'm writing out of hope someone else has or is experiencing this very thing and can perhaps shed some light. I'm clinging on to hope but it dwindles by the moment as I just don't know how much more I can take. It's heartbreaking.
I really feel for you, I have been in your shoes

Unfortunately in the decade or more that we have been together my partner hasn't stopped the 'evil rants' in fact I am beginning to see that what he subjects me to is abuse. He does have spells when it happens less but it also escalates to me being kicked out of our home (His House). There are times when we are happy and he treats me like a princess but he also knows how to hold a grudge something that happened 8 years ago can be thrown in my face like it happened this morning and he can twist things so much so that I find myself apologising for things I haven't done.

I'm not saying don't continue your relationship but think really hard about whether you can deal with his behaviour continuing as it is for potentially the rest of your life.

Take care of yourself

Last edited by BDPpartner; 10-03-2018 at 02:54 AM..
BDPpartner is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:24 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




advertisement

 

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice,
diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider. .
Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.

 

HomeAbout UsContact UsPrivacy PolicyTerms of UseDisclaimer
Forums HomeCommunity GuidelinesHelp


 
Helplines and Lifelines