Psych Central

Go Back   Forums at Psych Central > >



advertisement
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-10-2018, 08:34 PM   #1
Overit2316
Member
Overit2316 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Aug 2018
Location: Denver
Posts: 41
My Mood: I'm so EXHAUSTED

2 hugs
given
Unhappy I'm so EXHAUSTED

My husband is so depressed and I feel like I do a good job taking care of him emotionally, but when I need him to take care of me in any way even emotionally he acts like I am putting him out. He didn't used to be this way before he got sick. I don't know how to help someone that doesn't seem to want to have any empathy for anyone else. For lack of a better description it is like he wants to be stuck and selfish and expects everyone else to just deal with it...sigh. Suggestions of how to make our relationship equal again would be great! We are in couples counseling, but the therapist just moved our appointment till September 6th!
Overit2316 is offline   Reply With Quote
Hugs from:

advertisement
Old 08-10-2018, 10:13 PM   #2
Travelinglady
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Travelinglady's Avatar
Travelinglady is visiting her sister. :)
 
Member Since: Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 29,851 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood: I'm so EXHAUSTED

8 yr Member
16.3k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: I'm so EXHAUSTED

Dealing with a depressed person is hard. Not only do we have to put up with their not getting out of bed, but there's also more chores to take on. No wonder you're exhausted. My husband is bipolar, so I understand.

Is he taking medicine for it? See a therapist? Really that's what he needs.
Travelinglady is offline   Reply With Quote
Hugs from:
Old 10-02-2018, 04:36 PM   #3
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 78,064 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
49.3k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: I'm so EXHAUSTED

Hi, other than therapy etc.. posting here might help

Iím sending positive vibes to you both
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-24-2018, 03:56 PM   #4
Hanzo55
Junior Member
Hanzo55 Making things happen
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: Denver
Posts: 20
My Mood: I'm so EXHAUSTED

Default Re: I'm so EXHAUSTED

I've come to terms with the fact that my SO may *never* be able to satisfy my emotional needs. If you feel like it ever comes to this, you *must* set your boundaries and expectations with him up front.

I try to remind myself of this fact: when I entered into an agreement (marriage) with my SO, none of that dictated I become a licensed medical caregiver. "in sickness and in health" is not that same as "You will become a licensed psychiatrist/psychologist".

It takes a degree and many years of professional experience to be able to handle clinical depression. Don't mistake that for your obligations to care for him when he has the flu.

Remember: it is OK to tap out and give yourself a life that you deserve, unencumbered by his depression.

Stick that therapy out...but keep an internal clock running, and set a deadline for yourself. If there is no progress, you *can* pull the plug. You only have one life, and you deserve to live it!
Hanzo55 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:13 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




advertisement

 

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice,
diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider. .
Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.

 

HomeAbout UsContact UsPrivacy PolicyTerms of UseDisclaimer
Forums HomeCommunity GuidelinesHelp


 
Helplines and Lifelines