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Old 09-11-2018, 07:02 PM   #41
Skull&Crossbones
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Default Re: Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?

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Originally Posted by luvyrself View Post
ódonít ever be ashamed of your intelligence. Shame on you. Just because the one school didnít need you as a ta doesnít make you a loser. And how does that mean you are not good enough to teach at the college level? Have you even applied to other schools? If itís not meant to be, sometimes this kind of experience can point you towards something better for you, tho finding ones niche is not always easy. Be aware that there are significant student discipline aspects in teaching high school. But who knows, maybe you would be brilliant at that. There are many ways to use a degree. You didnít say what yrs is.
I loved this thread because street smarts is important as Are people skills. Tho I have a masters degree, my bff had only hs but she has a 30 pt higher IQ and is my mentor in life. Stop beating yourself up. Things will fall into place. Hugs!
Oh, I'm very aware of discipline issues in high school. I worked at a high school with a significant amount of low income families, immigrants, etc....so pretty much an "inner city" school. I worked in the special ed department so I've seen worse discipline issues than most teachers outside of special ed. And I'm certainly not someone who's afraid to step in and break up a fight as I've done it twice in the last year. I actually have a pretty good sense of when a fight will happen and then I can step in before it can escalate.

And honestly, the mild discipline issues (like constantly talking, not listening, and making noise) that continues through undergrad. I have no patience for it regardless, but I'm more forgiving of high school kids because it's part of where they are in their development.
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Old 09-11-2018, 07:03 PM   #42
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All my smarts has total practical application. My accounting knowledge would be worthless without my practical experience using it.

My computer smarts would be worthless if I couldn't figure out new technologies & how to accomplish what I need on new devices.

I have a natural ability fixing things which helped with my career & dealing with computer hardware. I live on my farm & things are constsntly breaking around here. Being creative in how to fix things since I don't have the muscle like men do is critical to getting repairs done in a timely manor.....& you bettcha.....YouTube Is my best friend. I found out how to replace my own EGR valve on my truck. I found our that if you use tie down ratchets you can move the spring on the lawn tractor deck so the belt can be replaced without taking it all apart. They have some very helpful ideas that one just has to figure out exactly how to implement.

My brain has always liked to figure out how to do things so my career just fit into my abilities well....& all the things I am involved in now in retirement still fit in.

Knowledge is useless if there is no practical application.....exactly why I am bad at trivia.
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Old 09-13-2018, 02:35 AM   #43
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Default Re: Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?

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Based on a lot of different people's descriptions of what being smart is, I feel even dumber. Can anyone explain why everyone's definition of smart seems to revolve around only knowledge? On Bloom's Taxonomy, knowledge is the lowest level of thinking. Analyzing, synthesizing, and evaluating are much higher level. And even beyond that, why doesn't creative thinking count for as much or more than just knowing things? Just because you know things, doesn't mean you know how to use it or how it fits into the context of everything else. I don't have as many facts memorized as other people, but why should I need to when I have the world's knowledge a google search away (or worst case scenario, at the library)?
Well...

Before there was Google, before there was LexisNexis, before you could access a decent encyclopedia in seconds, we had to memorize first before we could begin to analyze, synthesize, evaluate, etc. We needed all of that knowledge in order to be or become creative, had to know before using knowledge.

Iím not certain that accumulated knowledge is thinking. Knowledge is a sort of messy chest-of-drawers where we, haphazardly, stuff socks and underwear and spats and and school scarves and cuff links and collar stays and ties and other incidentals and when we need to dress formally (think formally) weíre able to use accumulated knowledge so that weíll not forget our spats.

Yes, Iím the Worst Nightmare that anyone may have in playing any edition of Trivial Pursuit; I have a giant, teetering armoire bursting open with knowledge socks spilling onto the floor. But I use those socks for more-than-trivial pursuits.

I guess that I can only speak of my generation ó we may have been the last with the need to accumulate and store knowledge in our minds.

I suppose thatís why many of us think so highly of the massive amount of bric-a-brac in our heads.

Sigh.
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Old 09-13-2018, 03:58 AM   #44
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Default Re: Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?

Personally I go through phases.
One day I am "watering myself down" . Trying to seem normal. Even stupid. And feel almost embarrassed if I "use big words"
The next day I am wearing my intelligence like a frelling badge of honor . Not quite flaunting it or rubbing it in. But using the vocabulary and vernacular I think with (hope that made sense) when it's not always necessary.
Example being using the word scorching versus simply saying hot.

Honestly I rarely know what kind of day I'll have when I leave for work until the right customers come in. (I am the manager at a bar and grill)

Discovering whether or not your gonna be able to hold an intelligent conversation in the middle of a discussion is not fun I might add.
Sometimes my day decides to switch (manic to depressed and vise versa) literally at the drop of a hat.

It's nice to know that I'm not the only one that has those days/moments.
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Old 09-13-2018, 03:57 PM   #45
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Default Re: Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?

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Oh, I'm very aware of discipline issues in high school. I worked at a high school with a significant amount of low income families, immigrants, etc....so pretty much an "inner city" school. I worked in the special ed department so I've seen worse discipline issues than most teachers outside of special ed. And I'm certainly not someone who's afraid to step in and break up a fight as I've done it twice in the last year. I actually have a pretty good sense of when a fight will happen and then I can step in before it can escalate.

And honestly, the mild discipline issues (like constantly talking, not listening, and making noise) that continues through undergrad. I have no patience for it regardless, but I'm more forgiving of high school kids because it's part of where they are in their development.
óóI love Amicusís answer to this aboveóóBut I thought this goes without saying, eg all of that on blooms I consider to be a part of intelligence. One of the things I liked best about my elem teacher training was the concept of multiple intelligences- that a person might not be good at one thing, or one aspect of thinking, but they might be very strong at something else. My partner taught high school, also with at risk kids and there is no way I would have been good at that. Apparently you are good at that and I donít see yourself giving yourself credit for that or anything else. I worked w at risk kids also. They need you so much. Whatís up?
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Old 09-14-2018, 12:11 AM   #46
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Default Re: Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?

The more I come back to this thread, the more I feel stupid. I can't even really think about how to put my thoughts down in writing.

Growing up I was teased/made fun of for failing at simple tasks. Always followed by a "[You need to be] smarter than the machine/whatever it was". I wasn't able to ride a bike as a kid. I even tried again as an adult and I can sort of do it, but not well enough to actually ride anywhere. And no one seems to understand how it feels to not be able to do something virtually ever small child can do. I had speech issues growing up...I remember working with a speech therapist. Talking clearly can still be an issue now but in most cases, no one notices. Unless of course, it's one of the words I struggle with every time...which makes you feel stupid in front of your professors when you have to use the word and you can't pronounce it. I have a difficult time remembering things and recalling the right information at the moment. I memorize a lot of things based on patterns...maybe why I was better at math than classes that required more memorization of facts? I also can't remember/process instructions/directions etc. aurally very well. If I'm given driving directions, they must be written or given to me one at a time or I'll only remember the last one I'm told.

In my career field, there are simple things and things that I have to be able to do that I really struggle with because of attention problems and physical limitations and it makes me feel so inferior. If you're teaching music to little kids, you're also teaching them to snap their fingers. I can only snap with one hand. I always had a hard time with music dictation (or transcription) or learning music by ear because of memory and attention.

All in all, I look dumb but people find out that I'm smart so I'm always afraid I'm going to be made fun of for looking dumb. And yet I could write complex music with little score study...I mean, every composer is "supposed" to study scores, but I only did it if I had to. I pretty much got everything I needed from playing other people's music and by instinct. So maybe some sort of idiot savant...I don't know.

All I know is I feel inferior to almost everyone pretty much all the time. I can't keep close relationships because of it. A lot of posts on this thread end up sounding like people calling me stupid.
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Old 09-14-2018, 07:12 AM   #47
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Have you ever had any mental health diagnosis? Sometimes knowing what is going on helpes us understand ourselves better & that way we can help others understand us better too.
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Old 09-14-2018, 08:08 AM   #48
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Default Re: Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Skull&Crossbones View Post
The more I come back to this thread, the more I feel stupid. I can't even really think about how to put my thoughts down in writing.

Growing up I was teased/made fun of for failing at simple tasks. Always followed by a "[You need to be] smarter than the machine/whatever it was". I wasn't able to ride a bike as a kid. I even tried again as an adult and I can sort of do it, but not well enough to actually ride anywhere. And no one seems to understand how it feels to not be able to do something virtually ever small child can do. I had speech issues growing up...I remember working with a speech therapist. Talking clearly can still be an issue now but in most cases, no one notices. Unless of course, it's one of the words I struggle with every time...which makes you feel stupid in front of your professors when you have to use the word and you can't pronounce it. I have a difficult time remembering things and recalling the right information at the moment. I memorize a lot of
things based on patterns...maybe why I was better at math than classes that required more memorization of facts? I also can't remember/process instructions/directions etc. aurally very well. If I'm given driving directions, they must be written or given to me one at a time or I'll only remember the last one I'm told.

In my career field, there are simple things and things that I have to be able to do that I really struggle with because of attention problems and physical
limitations and it makes me feel so inferior. If you're teaching music to little kids, you're also teaching them to snap their fingers. I can only snap with one hand. I always had a hard time with music dictation (or transcription) or learning music by ear because of memory and attention.

All in all, I look dumb but people find out that I'm smart so I'm always afraid I'm going to be made fun of for looking dumb. And yet I could write complex music with little score study...I mean, every composer is "supposed" to study scores,
but I only did it if I had to. I pretty much got everything I needed from playing other people's music and by instinct. So maybe some sort of idiot savant...I don't know.

All I know is I feel inferior to almost everyone pretty much all the time. I can't keep close relationships because of it. A lot of posts on this thread end up sounding like people calling me stupid.
ó-nobody is calling you stupid or hinting that or inferring that. Some of us struggle every day of our lives, just in a different way. I laughed when you mentioned idiot savant because I have called myself that. Even when Iím really messed up w my bipolar mixed states, I have some insights that some people around me donít notice. You didnít tell the whole story in the first post, so how could we know all youíve been thru. You are all the more amazing for what you have accomplished. Many of us have advanced degrees, but on our bad days some of us are totally faking it. During my bad episodes, I have severe confusion (I donít cry as a ruleó-repressing crying so I could work and function may have caused that). In my worst days I canít do math, at all. However, in less stressful periods, I can sometimes be completely normal for an entire year.
I was the star in my family until my slacker brother finally decided to apply himself to get into law school and became a top litigator and head of the board of the am cancer society worldwide. Yes that makes me feel like an also ran sometimes. And the people in my family that havenít had depression, let alone bp mixed just donít get it. Hey during episodes Iím faking it all the time.
So we get it , we really do. Iím proud that I stuck it out like you did, but for you it was even a bigger accomplishment. Iím proud to know you and all our family here on the forum welcomes you.
What are your diagnoses? Maybe you could be supported a lot more by the professionals. Weíre behind you, we support you, we believe in you. Hugs.
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Old 09-14-2018, 11:40 AM   #49
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Default Re: Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?

I don't know if I had an official diagnosis when I was a kid or not. I imagine it would be depression and anxiety or something similar. Several other possibilities were thrown out there but nothing ever stuck.

I'm not sure I want to return to a doctor because all they do is just throw a bunch of medication at you. As long as I'm able to survive work/school and take care of myself for the most part, I'm not sure medication is necessary. And I pretty much have to switch doctors and insurance every year. And honestly, I don't know if I get insurance for the semester I'll have to sub (as I would be certified at the end of a fall semester and could only do long-term subbing for a semester) so I don't want to risk starting medication that I can't afford.

What would be more helpful really would be to find more understanding, love, acceptance etc. in real life. And I feel particularly vulnerable right now because I broke up with my ex about a month and a half ago and while he could show me some love, he could never really understand or fully accept me. Not like he wasn't willing to, he just couldn't.
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Old 09-14-2018, 12:03 PM   #50
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I honestly trust the diagnoses of psychologists more because they don't have medication in the back of their mind as treatment but they focus of teaching & working on better coping skills. Meds never were the solution for me either.....but learning new skills after living with dysfunctional parents for 21 years & a dysfunctional H for another 33 years I needed serious help learning how to deal with life in a normal functional way.
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Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?Is anyone else ashamed of being smart?
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