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Old 02-06-2019, 12:59 PM #1
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Default Thinking about the obsessions (again)

Just getting this out, about the usual obsession problem.
If anyone is readng this, the original obsession explanation is here: Nervousness over something stupid

I feel a lot of shame about this obsession because of what it is. Something I shouldn't like and shouldn't be looking at. But it's not really me, I don't really like them, these obsessions have a mind of their own and impose themselves on me. I've seen these objects loads of times before and never liked them, never even took any notice of them. Then suddenly I become totally obsessed to the point that I think about them all the time? That not real. So how can I be ashamed of myself if I didn't choose to like them in the first place?

I've never chosen any of these obsessions. Most of them are totally stupid, ridiculous things I've never had the slightest interest in before (like the current one). So I realised I don't really like these things. How can I, when I've seen them everywhere for years and never liked them or cared. Surely if I really liked them, then I'd have took an interest years ago.

If I could choose what to be obsessed with, I'd have no idea what to choose. I don't want to be obsessed with anything really. But it definitely wouldn't be the thing I am obsessed with, I'd have to think of something acceptable. But I don't. These obsessions just happen and I can't seem to control them.

I honestly can't imagine not being obsessed with something. I've always had an obsession, and when one ends, it moves onto another. Sometimes I have more than one at a time, but usually that's more of an overlap, where an old one is fading and a new one is starting. Also there's been side obsessions alongside the main obsessions, but these are usually short lived. There has always been an obsession. I don't even know what it feels like to be free of this and not be obsessed with something. I can't imagine it, can't imagine not constantly daydreaming about an object I want and can't have.

My last obsession went on for a while after this one started, but I think it's finally finished now, as I never daydream about them anymore. I've realised this obsession is following the same pattern as the last one, going through the same things. If it is, then I'm now on the last stage. I thought I was on that stage before, but it wasn't, not quite. This is it though, it feels exactly the same. This one has moved along a lot quicker than the last one and I know the reason for that. I've pushed myself to look at them and form new daydreams etc, hoping that I can hurry up and end it. I've really hoping that this is the last stage and that it ends soon. I wish I knew how to hurry it along even faster.

But I really don't want it to move on to anything else, I want to be free from obsessions. I don't want a new one. I wish I knew how to make that happen but I don't understand how the obsesions work from the beginning, why they form, and why they choose the objects that they do. And I guess I'll never know.

Just needed to get that out and didn't want to hijack any other threads with such a long rant.
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Old 02-07-2019, 04:12 AM #2
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

I'm so sorry, randomer123 Do you see a therapist? Maybe that could help. You could learn where these obsessions come from, and learn how to stop them. I'm so sorry, please don't give up. Unfortunately obsessions are hard to get away from. They don't necessarely follow any logic, at least at first glance. That's why it's important to discover where are they coming from. Please get the help you need, if you haven't already. Is there anything we can do to help you? Please let us know. I hope you'll feel better soon. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. I believe in you. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Please don't worry about writing too much. Feel free to vent here as much as you want. We'll listen to what you have to say and won't judge you. I'm here for you as well if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. I'm always available if you need to talk. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
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Old 02-08-2019, 03:50 AM #3
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

Quote:
Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky View Post
I'm so sorry, randomer123 Do you see a therapist? Maybe that could help. You could learn where these obsessions come from, and learn how to stop them. I'm so sorry, please don't give up. Unfortunately obsessions are hard to get away from. They don't necessarely follow any logic, at least at first glance. That's why it's important to discover where are they coming from. Please get the help you need, if you haven't already. Is there anything we can do to help you? Please let us know. I hope you'll feel better soon. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. I believe in you. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Please don't worry about writing too much. Feel free to vent here as much as you want. We'll listen to what you have to say and won't judge you. I'm here for you as well if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. I'm always available if you need to talk. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
Thanks. To be honest, I wouldn't mind the obsessions so much if they were acceptable things. In the past, some of them were, but the the current one and the one before it are unacceptable things.

Fortunately the last one has ended now, I never think about that anymore. I'm so glad about that. This current one is still really bad, but I'm hoping it's now in the last stage and will end soon. It's just that obsessions don't end until something else takes over. If it's something acceptable, something I can do and/or have then I won't mind so much.

Of course I'd rather not be obsessed with anything at all but anything would be better than this. I wish I knew of a way to force it to end, but that only makes it worse.
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Old 02-10-2019, 09:31 AM #4
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

There's a part of (probably ego) that think that it's possible to get the obsession object. I'm not listening to that nonsense, it's stupid. There is no possible way (believe me, I've thought about it plenty). It's just unrealistic. As if these obsessions weren't annoying enough to deal with anyway, I have to battle these stupid thoughts on top of it. Trying to get rid of them as soon as they come up, but it's quite difficult.
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Old 02-10-2019, 02:21 PM #5
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

You sound like me. I always have something to obsess over and to worry about. And if for some crazy reason I didn't have something to worry about, I would find something to worry about. It's just part of the condition for me.
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Old 02-14-2019, 06:51 AM #6
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

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Originally Posted by Clark75 View Post
You sound like me. I always have something to obsess over and to worry about. And if for some crazy reason I didn't have something to worry about, I would find something to worry about. It's just part of the condition for me.
I don't really worry about it. It's more frustration, that I really want the objects I'm obsessed with, but know I can't have them. And also the time I waste daydreaming about having them.
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Old 02-16-2019, 03:25 AM #7
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

Hey it really sounds like you have a hard case of OCD. Have you talked to a therapist about the your obsessions. I talk to mine about them I could give a few tips that work for me. When the thought pops in your mind , donít fight it that just makes it worse. Just casually focus your mind of something else, something funny, a good movie, anything else. This usually helps me I start obsessing over things because eventually it just floats away into the abyss out of my head. Also writing/journaling has helped with my obsessing also. Take a few minutes out of the day and write down what your obsessing about. Itíll help you release it from your mind. I hope those tips help!
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Old 02-18-2019, 10:10 AM #8
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

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Originally Posted by ken9018 View Post
Hey it really sounds like you have a hard case of OCD. Have you talked to a therapist about the your obsessions. I talk to mine about them I could give a few tips that work for me. When the thought pops in your mind , donít fight it that just makes it worse. Just casually focus your mind of something else, something funny, a good movie, anything else. This usually helps me I start obsessing over things because eventually it just floats away into the abyss out of my head. Also writing/journaling has helped with my obsessing also. Take a few minutes out of the day and write down what your obsessing about. Itíll help you release it from your mind. I hope those tips help!
I saw a counselor a few years ago about it, but she didn't seem to think it was a problem. I was in the middle of a totally different obsession then thought, a more acceptable one, so I didn't care so much. I also do write about my thoughts and it has helped me see how these obsessions work, but doesn't stop them from happening.

I feel like I'm losing interest now, I'm not thinking about them so much. I really hope this means it's going away. I hope it's not just temporary. Obviously it's still there but nowhere near as intense. I looked at some pictures of them them last night and wasn't really that interested. If I can keep it like this, I'm hoping it will fade away. I hope.
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Old 03-05-2019, 12:28 PM #9
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Default Re: Thinking about the obsessions (again)

Sorting my thoughts.

The obsessions come in 2 different types:

Normal: These are what I mostly had in my teens and earlier. They were for things like music and video games, and they were the normal sort of obsessions that everyone has, though maybe sometimes a bit more intense? I haven't had one of these types of obsession for a while. And when I did they were nowhere near as strong as back then.

Not normal: These are always for objects of various types. I become obsessed with a certain thing, look at pictures, daydream about having whatever it is. In the past I've been able to get the thing or at least something very close. I've obsessed over it until I got bored and moved onto the next thing. Back in 2014 I started a new obsession which I could never get. It lasted until the end of last year (2018), and that was only because I started a new obsession back in May last year. This new one eventually took over the old one, and now I have lost interest in the old one, never think about them anymore. But the new one is worse I think, I've deleted everything I had about them and I am trying to stop daydreaming. I still do sometimes about one particular theme but I'm hoping to stop that now.

All of these "not normal" ones come with some level of nervousness though. The very first one, I couldn't even get because I just couldn't force myself to buy it. I eventually did get a different type many months later, and that seemed to "work" to satisfy the obsession until a new one took over. Some of them have only had a bit of nervousness at the beginning and then I've managed to easily get them. This one, I have no choice, I can't buy one. But if I could, I wonder if I even could or would I be too nervous?

I'm just waiting for this one to end. That could mean another one has to take over though. I hate to think what it will be next, could it really get any worse than this one? I have been trying to stop daydreaming about them because I think that's probably whats still keeping it alive, because I remember what they look like. If I stop daydreaming about them, I'm hoping I can forget what they look like and then the obsession will end? I hope I don't see any anywhere, I will definitely try to avoid places that sell them for now, until the obsession is over. I don't want to rekindle it.

But for now my main objective is to stop daydreaming about them. Every time I find myself doing it, STOP and turn it into something else. I should think of something to turn it around to, and make a habit of doing it every time. Especially in the morning when I need to get up and can't just lie there thinking about stupid things like that.

Edit: Also these "not normal" obsessions are just a "theme" for something deeper. I never want the objects really, they are just a theme, but there's something beneath them keeping them going and making new ones happen, I'm not sure how or why it chooses certain objects. It's probably that underlying thing that I have to break, I just need to work out how to.
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