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Old 04-11-2017, 11:10 PM   #11
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Default Re: Help me someone

Quote:
Originally Posted by NothingPeopleDo View Post
How can I get rid of all the negativity I've been through? I hope someone can help, there's been way too much for just one person and I just can't let go. Please help me... I need to release all my bad memories and I don't know how to do it.
Sounds like PTSD may be an issue if you have bad memories recurring so much. What kind of bad memories? Like what happened to you and how do you feel about it?
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Old 07-28-2017, 03:11 PM   #12
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I agree with Skeezyks you need to vent to a therapist for startrs.
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Old 08-02-2017, 08:06 PM   #13
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Venting to a therapist was a joke. The fake understanding, the act as if they knew where I was coming from. I unfortunately have not been so lucky with finding one that was helpful. What am
I supposed to embrace??? The crap for so many years that caused me to be who I am. It's always easy with the mouth. Life is crazy and some of us have been dealt a crappy hand. Stopping to smell the flowers doesn't work for me. Torment, pain, agony, stress, middle l leading traps is what consumes me. Sure I would like to be a normal person but that I'll never be. I can do what so many recommended by leading a false life but what is that. Some of us were made to be loaners, to live with all these thoughts and memories that others attempt to relate to but cannot. I guess it is what it is for some of us. Sure I appreciate the extended arms for help. It reality shows something different. Have to cut short
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Old 08-03-2017, 10:19 PM   #14
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Hello my friend! It's been a long time. I've had to find other forums since you abandoned this one. But I still find posting and sometimes discussing things here on PC to be useful. How are things going?
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Old 08-07-2017, 09:52 AM   #15
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Oh yes, if we all just vented to therapists we'd be All BetterHelp me someone

It's not like the two diagnosed narcissists here, NothingPeopleDo and myself, have already tried this completely useless approach.

It's useless because therapists work with and are trained to work with people who are really blatantly dysfunctional but still have their capacity for empathy mostly intact.

Most narcissists aren't in crisis in the traditional sense of the word, and it's well established that we simply don't feel empathy. Our minds work in a fundamentally different way than those who do feel empathy.

While I'm not as bad as I used to be, I improved largely on my own with little outside help outside of the two friends I hadn't chased off somehow. I didn't improve because of therapy. I'm in therapy now, but not for NPD. I'm in therapy for an extensive trauma history that as much as I loathe admitting it, I can't deal with it on my own.

But therapy for NPD that's actually effective?

Next time I see a unicorn I'll let you know.
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Old 08-20-2017, 11:09 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fractured Infant View Post
I agree 100% with AD. You can't get rid of the memories but changing your perspective can help.

Since I have found out about NPD and how it develops and the symptoms etc. It has helped me greatly. When I start to rage, I can step back and see myself, I can recognize that my giant ego is doing what it does best, protecting me with anger, it attacks. Underneath it is pain. I don't think I was ever hugged or reassured as a kid. I think I buried the pain because there wasn't a way to deal with it. Now I know my ego is too big and over active. Instead of reacting in anger I know it's okay and safe to react with sadness and hurt. I hope this makes some sense. One thing that helped me a lot was talking to my sister, we went through the same ****. I found it easy to feel really sad at her story and cry for her, then I realized I was crying for me too.

It's not easy but I think you have to feel the pain. Dip in a foot feel it, then drop your whole self in, understand it, acknowledge it accept it. You were mistreated. Something was taken or withheld from you. You have to grieve for it before you can move on. Even though it happened so many years ago I think you have to grieve for it, feel it's effect on your body, your spirit, your soul. Then I think you may be able to let go. Not forget but let go and move on. Release.

I think the challenge is getting in touch with those feelings and more importantly having a lifeline, safety net, time and people around you to support you through it. I think something buried for so long can take a long time to work through.

I am not a professional so I am merely speaking from my experiences and my heart and mind. I think we push the pain really far down but the cost is disconnecting from our emotions, and all the negatives that allows, you know you live with it everyday. Doing that means we never react with fear or hurt or vulnerability which should be quite normal and productive. Instead we always react with anger which only further injures and isolates us.

I hope some of this makes sense.
I am deeply grateful for the your thoughts/experience.
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Old 08-22-2017, 10:20 PM   #17
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I guess most know who I really am, I have been gone for quite some time now. Somehow I always find my way back. NothingPeopleDo/??????..... could it be??? Hello old friend!! Hope all is well.
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