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Old 10-17-2016, 02:42 AM   #1
*freak*
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Default Do you love your narcissistic parent?

I don't. I only loved him when I was very little. He's always been so abusive (verbally and emotionally), all that love completely dissipated. It always surprises me to hear that other adult children of N parents still love them and want to keep them in their life.
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Old 10-17-2016, 02:46 AM   #2
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I love them because they are my parents. Not as people. Does that make sense?
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Old 10-17-2016, 05:07 AM   #3
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It does That's how I feel about my mom, who was more neglectful rather than mean. My father though... no love in any way, shape, or form there...
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Old 10-17-2016, 06:43 AM   #4
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Have you dated NPDs?
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Old 10-17-2016, 07:35 AM   #5
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Default Re: Do you love your narcissistic parent?

I do love my narcissistic mother. Aside from her being that, she is also so loving, wonderful and amazing. She is hilariously funny (in a narcissistic way, though). She is brilliantly smart (imparting words of wisdom that are quite skewed, but not wrong). She does crossword puzzles in pen. She has great language skills.

She has loved me as I am an extension of her. I have stayed in her good graces. We have had countless good times together. Yes, she is twisted, but she taught me the whole world is, too.

She had hard knocks that burst her bubble. My father's death took such a toll on her, she never recovered. Not, in her old age, the narcissistic tendencies have become out of hand and the depression and hysteria, too. It pains me to see her go down this way.

Yes, I have anger for a lot of things she did and said to me. But I also have infinite love for her. She is my mother. I have no doubt she truly loves me.

I am sorry you both had so much abuse you don't love or like your parents at all.

In my case, being a narcissist did not really make my mom a bad person. She's just twisted and a control freak. Her bark is worse than her bite and she is her own worst enemy.

I think one good thing she did and a reason why I feel better about her is because, while she was pretty abusive to all three of her daughters, she never pit us against each other. We are all together as daughters in a kind of therapy together where we finally figured out that mom is narcissistic/ histrionic disordered and can commiserate and support each other.

Last edited by TishaBuv; 10-17-2016 at 07:52 AM..
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Old 10-17-2016, 11:49 PM   #6
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Default Re: Do you love your narcissistic parent?

I was waaaaay below my brothers. She deeply and openly preferred them, over me.

And that was just not OK with me.

She said didn't love me a much because i didn't "need" her. So, I was a tough, resilient independent person so you didn't love me? OK.

Right. Kids don't need their parents.
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Old 10-18-2016, 10:29 AM   #7
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Default Re: Do you love your narcissistic parent?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ValentinaVVV View Post
I was waaaaay below my brothers. She deeply and openly preferred them, over me.

And that was just not OK with me.

She said didn't love me a much because i didn't "need" her. So, I was a tough, resilient independent person so you didn't love me? OK.

Right. Kids don't need their parents.
Was she of that old school thinking that the boys were more important than girls?

I know if we were boys, my mother wouldn't have said any of the things she said to us girls. She wouldn't have pulled any of the crap she did. She would have raised us to be providers, whereas i was actually told, not by just her, but by lots of family and their friends, too "Don't be a provider, marry one".

Your mother had some deep rooted issue with you because you were a girl, I guess.
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Old 10-18-2016, 05:55 PM   #8
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Default Re: Do you love your narcissistic parent?

My brothers were the golden children. I always thought she was a bit jealous of me and the things I did.
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Old 06-03-2017, 11:43 AM   #9
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yes but i am just insanely frustrated with all the emotional damage I've gotta sort through now because of her
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Old 07-06-2017, 02:07 AM   #10
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Default Re: Do you love your narcissistic parent?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous37883 View Post
I love them because they are my parents. Not as people. Does that make sense?
I feel the same way. If she were anyone but my mother I would avoid her like the plague.
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