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Old 03-17-2019, 08:04 PM #1
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Default She left me

Hello everyone,
So my girlfriend of four years left me. We have a two year old together. We have been having a rough patch for a few months now about money and not being on the same page. We canít of view the world in a different lens although we both mean well. Anyway, Iíve always been someone who felt that itís better to open your mouth and let people know whatís up/bothering you versus taking it out another way. Being a man I feel like it works against us, as it makes us seem weak or untrustworthy. I just and trying to get on the same page. Anyway, she was done with it today and left..... she felt that I didnít respect her and Iíve been feeling like that for quite some time now. Interestingly it was sort of motivating for me to have this change, to become better. However, now that I am back home in bed .... not having them both by my side just kills me. I miss them both. My girlfriend, my daughter. All I can think about is how I will work hard in getting what I think my wife wants out of this relationship , our own space, bills paid, etc. There is a lot of story Iím leaving out ... but I guess I just am wondering how to deal with the i between, the patience.... the working hard today to see a potential reunion months from now or a year from now. Am I being silly to think itíll happen... it is a good goal to have. What if she sees someone and then chooses to come back to me.... should I be okay with that?

Really wish I acted on time and did what I had to do... but now im here, wanting them back.
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Old 03-18-2019, 03:04 PM #2
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Hello DadLyfe: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central. One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the relationships & communications forum along with it's divorce & separation sub-forum. Here a link to the relationships forum:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/rela...communication/

And then, since you & your gf have a child together, one additional forum you may wish to check out would be the healthy parenting forum:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/healthy-parenting/

I'm sorry I don't think I am the correct person to offer advice with regard to your concerns. Hopefully there will be other members who will feel able to do so. In the meantime, however, here are links to 4 articles, from Psych Central's archives, on the subject of recovering following a break-up:

Help on Healing from Heartbreak

10 Tips for Navigating Heartbreak

Letting Go and Moving On After a Breakup or Divorce

https://psychcentral.com/blog/reclai...r-breaking-up/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
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Old 03-19-2019, 03:39 AM #3
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Default Re: She left me

You said she had enough but what did she have a Knouff of? You also referred to your girlfriend and your wife are they the same person? I'm sorry your two-year-old is also not with you that must be very painful . Is there any chance that you could sit down and have a conversation with her about what happened? I just wonder if there are details either that are missing or that we're not shared with you so that maybe you could do something on your end to make things easier for the both of you. When there's a child involved I feel it is very very good to work hard on the relationship between the two parents. The last thing you wanna do is upset the child correct? But then again I don't know if things were bad with you and your girlfriend or not. If they were some people say it's more Trumatic to stay together for the child then it is to split up. What do you think?
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Old 03-19-2019, 03:44 AM #4
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Default Re: She left me

I'm really sorry you're hurting. I hope you will still be able to be in your daughter's life. Do you think you and your ex can work something out so that at least you can be a part of your daughter's life? I think that is important for both you and your daughter.
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Old 03-19-2019, 10:16 AM #5
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Default Re: She left me

"Iíve always been someone who felt that itís better to open your mouth and let people know whatís up/bothering you versus taking it out another way. Being a man I feel like it works against us, as it makes us seem weak or untrustworthy."


that might be true. lucky I don't care about how my mom or others see me, as long as they respect me as a human being.


You could spend time with the daughter if you want, as you might have to pay child support anyways.
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