Is this an issue? Sex questions. - Forums at Psych Central


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Old 08-30-2018, 10:27 PM #1
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Default Is this an issue? Sex questions.

I have sex, and it feels good.
Frequently, I orgasm, but do not lose my erection and continue toward several more orgasms, sometimes six or seven before I completely lose my ability to continue, but not usually my erection.
Sometimes, I can't keep interest long enough to insert it in her. I just get bored and quit.
All that said, I'm bipolar type one with ADHD and PTSD, and was molested as a child by older kids.
Sometimes I have flashbacks during sex and have to stop. Sometimes the flashbacks are bullies, sometimes not.
Sometimes, and it usually accompanies the continued erection, I feel very angry toward my past and myself and sometimes my partner and it's like I can't eff her fast enough or hard enough or long enough.
I need to address all this more with my regular therapist, but how much of this is normal and acceptable or desirable and what isn't? I think I might be becoming addicted to sex but that could also be the bipolar, because I've also always been hypersexual.
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Old 08-31-2018, 03:17 PM #2
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Smile Re: Is this an issue? Sex questions.

I don't know anything about this. Really I don't! (I've been impotent for so long I can't even remember what sex was like.)

(There's actually a joke related to this I can share here. Two old men are sitting on a park bench. One of them elbows the other & says: "Hey, you gettin' anything on the side? The other replies: "Why... I haven't had anything in so long, I didn't even know they'd moved it!"

The only thing I can say is that I've been told some psych med's can apparently cause a man to have an erection he can't get rid of. I don't know if you're on any psych med's. But if you are perhaps this is a med-related issue that is spilling over into your sexuality & mental-health-related issues? It may be something to consider.

My best wishes to you...
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Old 09-01-2018, 07:58 AM #3
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Default Re: Is this an issue? Sex questions.

Heavily medicated but sometimes it's been this way for ages.
Little joke here too
Old man asks his buddy if he's getting any lately and his buddy replies that he's getting social security sex.
Buddy immediate gets probed, "what's that?"
"It's a little bit, once a month, you're grateful for it but it's never enough and not worth the time you put into it over the years"
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Old 02-07-2019, 08:52 AM #4
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Default Re: Is this an issue? Sex questions.

Sorry bud. I don't have sex, which means I don't think about any of this.


My advice would be to stop having sex for a bit.
Possible trigger:
This would be for the sake of your sexual health: if your partner wants sex, then you'd have to consider her wants, your wants, and your needs. And in my opinion, needs are more important than wants. I don't want to read a newspaper article about you this weekend, my friend.
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Old 04-02-2019, 11:06 PM #5
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Default Re: Is this an issue? Sex questions.

What I'm getting from this is that when you have sex you go really hard and rough because you're thinking about the older kids that took advantage of you when you were a kid, and you're releasing your anger towards them this way. It's almost like you're getting revenge, in your mind. Now you want to learn how to have sex simply for pleasure, without having these traumatic flashbacks. Right?

First of all, I'm sorry that this activity that's supposed to be purely pleasurable has been obscured by your childhood trauma It's not your fault, and nobody should have to go through that. Many victims of sexual assault can relate to exactly how you feel.

I think that this definitely needs to be explored privately with a therapist, or in a support group for sexual assault victims. They might give you ideas for healthy coping mechanisms, and at the same time, allow you to release some of the pain that you've been harboring for so long.
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