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Unread 05-19-2017, 01:13 PM   #1
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Default Bad hospitalization experiences

Has anyone had some really bad hospitalization experiences? I get the impression from reading on Psych Central that most people do not see them as horrors. My experiences are from more than twenty years ago, but in those two cases, in at least part of the hospitals the treatment modalities seemed to be to humiliate the patients. Call the patients babies, tell them (me) that it was their own fault, stuff like that.

Not all the staff were that way -- the kinder ones tended to be the regular-people staff, not the psychiatric staff.

I think I see now that the reasons for this were the utter frustration of staff and inability to see any way of understanding the patients or any way to help them, rather than any inherent cruelty or evil. But at the time it was very hard for me to take. In the first such case, even though I felt horrible and that I was the problem rather than they, I finally just up and left. Eloped, they called it. Couldn't see how anything they did was helping me.

One of these places was a state hospital, filled with a kind of despair*, but no real physical mistreatment. The second was a ward in a prestigious general hospital, but the atmosphere to me was toxic regardless of the hospital's reputation.

It was a long time ago, but it still leaves me feeling that I never want to go into a psych hospital again. A couple of years ago I felt strong enough to go look at the place where I once was -- it had been closed and abandoned for some time. Interesting to look at it from a better place!


*I vividly remember finding what was apparently an unfinished letter that some poor stiff had written to some relative, which started out just normally, relating their experiences, but ended with the words "help!, help!, help!".
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Unread 05-19-2017, 06:50 PM   #2
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

Ive had a bad experience only cause i could not handle myself being there i was often forced meds via injection.had severe sid effects.last time i went attacked by a patient.the staff at one hospital didnt care about you as i was called out of my name by one. My psychiatrist lost his cool and told me to jump off a high counter at one point even trying to pull me off so id fall.
I am by no means an angel i did stuff im not proud of.i often feel in hospitals im not really myself its funny you mentioned the words help help.someone at one hospital had written on the wall im not crazy thos place makes me crazy which i thought whoever that was they had a point and so i began using that as my go to point.but yes not so thrilled about going back
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Unread 05-20-2017, 12:46 PM   #3
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

I have experience with 2 crisis wards. (well, three actually, but two were the same building - just a locked ward and an open ward) One was horrid, one was OK. The horrid one locked me in seclusion whenever they couldn't spare someone to stay with me (which was every night). While in seclusion I was treated like an animal, and when I had a vivid flashback (as in, reliving the torture I had endured - meaning, lying on the ground screaming and begging and trying to fight off invisible people) they had a look and just.. walked away. Upon admission I had given them written instructions on how they could help me in those situations and they didn't do anything. They just didn't care. Those were some of the longest 10 days of my life. I was ever so thankful when I was transferred to my "regular" psych ward and my pdoc told me I could sleep in a bed again instead of in a locked seclusion room.
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Unread 05-20-2017, 12:51 PM   #4
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

The good one was very respectful. They also were very non-forceful, even when I had quit eating and drinking and stuff. I remember one night I was very agitated and was "acting out" (acting out isn't really the right word for it - that sounds too deliberate - I was desperate to escape the agitation and tried banging my head against the wall, screaming, and tearing my clothes off (in the living room - all other patients had gone to bed)) and both the night nurse and the sleeping night nurse (every night there was one nurse awake and one nurse that slept and could be called on in case of emergencies) stayed up with me until I was feeling better. When I tore off my clothes the male nurse stayed around the corner, though, just out of sight.
Respectful is really the only word I have for it. The stay wasn't pleasant, but the staff were kind and respectful, and that made everything a lot better.
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Unread 05-21-2017, 07:44 AM   #5
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

Quote:
Originally Posted by Breadfish View Post
I have experience with 2 crisis wards. (well, three actually, but two were the same building - just a locked ward and an open ward) One was horrid, one was OK. The horrid one locked me in seclusion whenever they couldn't spare someone to stay with me (which was every night). While in seclusion I was treated like an animal.
In one hospital I was in, the seclusion room had only a thin mattress on the floor, and nothing else. They called it the "Special Treatment Room" !

However, they did not physically mistreat people there.
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Unread 05-21-2017, 10:52 PM   #6
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

I've sure had some bad times in them. Sleeping on a thin mattress on the floor in the "safety room", freezing cold under these massive "fire blankets"- the kind tha you'd roll in if you were on fire, they don't bend really and are not meant for warmth. Had to spend one or two nights there and was not allowed back to my room (tho I snuck in anyway to use the toilet) and was supposed to ask to go to the bathroom.

One time on the side emergency psych ward unit, I swapped alters and locked myself in the only bathroom on the hall. Staff went ballistic, especially when they found out their keys wouldn't open it. I finally unlocked it before they tore down, but the shunted me back to the ER. Spent other ER nights on a thin mattress on a floor in the "observation room".

Last year I had a terrible time being moved from ER to the unit- I forgot my meds were on me. They ripped them from me, dumped them in the floor, said I was hoarding meds and going to OD (I wasn't- they were my rescue benzos for panic. I'm supposed to have them with me). Then said they were going to do a strip search (with a male guard in front of the locked unit doors and a locked door behind me with a window.
I freaked, switched alters, flew at the door behind me trying to get out, yelling "let me out! I have to get out!!" Once they did get me calm (thanks to a nurse I knew), I learned I'd been put on a hold for an attempted escape, if you can believe.
I won't go back.
Oh and one ER was the worst- I'd scratched myself with my keeps while waiting 3 hours. When they found out in the ER room, they said "now we have to take everything from you". A burly make security guard was ripping my coat off, 3 nurses and the female dr all went for different parts of me- earrings, necklace, ring... I swapped alters, fought them, but only my screaming bloody murder stopped them. "Stop screaming!!"
I said "you can't treat me like that!!!" The dr even knew my DID dx.

Sure not a place to go for fun. It becomes a matter of risk for me these days... How bad is bad before I admit I can't make it alone?
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Unread 05-22-2017, 08:33 PM   #7
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

i've heard so many horror stories about psych wards, and lock wards, that it's part of my treatment plan that 'Hospitalization" never even be mentioned. that was important when i was suicidal, not so much any more. but it still freaks me out that a Pdoc who sees me collapsing from stress would heap on that much more stress....

every Pintern should be drugged and locked on a ward with a Dx of Delusional, so they know what they are doing to people.
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Unread 05-22-2017, 08:56 PM   #8
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gus1234U View Post
i've heard so many horror stories about psych wards, and lock wards, that it's part of my treatment plan that 'Hospitalization" never even be mentioned. that was important when i was suicidal, not so much any more. but it still freaks me out that a Pdoc who sees me collapsing from stress would heap on that much more stress....

every Pintern should be drugged and locked on a ward with a Dx of Delusional, so they know what they are doing to people.
Yes!!! They should!!!! I completely agree and have long thought this. And they can see what it is like to wait hours for your meds, to have to self advocate for an Ativan, hair brush, bra... To walk around in scrubs for weeks behind Windows that don't open and locked doors. To have to fake wellness to get out. To have pnurse think they know you after 15 minutes. To wait hours for a shower until someone has time to unlock it and guard you for 15 minutes. To live your every waking moment on camera. To be held suspect when trying to get reprieve from the cameras or be put in the isolation room for throwing a deck of playing cards across an empty room because you couldn't get your needs net for the umpteenth time and stood waiting at the counter, being ignored, for thirty minutes by several staff.

Whew- guess I had to rant for a minute.
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Unread 05-24-2017, 05:38 PM   #9
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

my mom sent me to a youth wilderness bootcamp program when i was 16.i lived there for 8 months. They started getting investigated for child abuse and got bought out. There was a class action lawsuit for the time period i was there because a dr.. Lied about his credentials to work there and treat us. Anyway we had no basic human rights. Worse than prison. And before you call ******** just trust me
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Unread 05-24-2017, 09:45 PM   #10
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Default Re: Bad hospitalization experiences

2 hospitalizations. in the 1st one, I was given heavy, involuntary shock. I came in sedated, so I didn't know about the shock until I ended up getting a brain scan a couple years later (long story). They also traumatized me, let me OD on Restoril, ran up a huge tab on the insurance, and then released my info in the community after I got out to "teach me a lesson." I was 20 years old.
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