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Old 02-17-2019, 11:07 PM   #531
LucyD
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Something to read and think about:

Why nutritional psychiatry is the future of mental health treatment
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Old 02-18-2019, 04:39 PM   #532
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There are barriers beyond my control making it more difficult for me to lose weight. Dietitian spelled them all out for me. Well, that's frustrating. I can be doing everything right, follow the program to the letter, and it still doesn't work.
I'm so sorry. I hate when doctors list out reasons for why you have trouble or can't do X, Y, Z.

I seem to have these problems with my mental illnesses, why doctors tell me I get sick a lot or why I have trouble doing things like organizing and probably always will. EDs aren't good no matter which type you have, and nearly all of them, unless it's something like pica, stem from the same problems that often cut down to childhood crap.
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Old 02-19-2019, 12:41 PM   #533
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Here but feel horrid today. My daughter (11 yr. old) had insomnia last night, kept waking me. I couldn't go back to sleep after she woke me crying around 2 AM. I only got her to sleep with children's Benadryl, and that was something like 5 or 5:30 AM. I am exhausted.
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Old 02-19-2019, 02:37 PM   #534
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How is everyone else doing? OK eating wise today, but the stupid ED and exercise. I actually went jogging in light/rain drizzle in the dark (early morning). I think the running in the dark thing might be mixed with the bipolar, sort of a manic (risky) behavior. My bipolar is type I with mixed features and it seems the "with mixed features" is mostly my default, unfortunately. I may have lost some more weight. Looking bonier and haven't weighed myself in 4, 5 days. I'm tempted. But I guess the good thing is I only take the weight after using the bathroom in the morning as my normal weight, so once I've drunk or eaten anything, I don't bother. Don't know if I can hold out much longer. I wish I could, but IDK.

Why do we put so much of our self-worth into a stupid number on the scale? And so much so that even 1 or 2 lb. more or less makes a huge difference. Ugh, EDs just suck.
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Old 02-19-2019, 09:38 PM   #535
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Eating wisely as well, following directions, weight loss still not happening. By all accounts, it isn't that I'm doing anything wrong. For some reason my metabolism just isn't cooperating. I'm being advised to keep up what I'm doing, and just wait.
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Old 02-20-2019, 05:15 AM   #536
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My husband is (most likely without meaning to) starting to sabotage things. We both need to lose weight, and we're both in this program. Yesterday he went shopping for things I needed. I had given him a specific list. He came home with some extra things I hadn't asked for, and they were high calorie. Some of it he intended to share with me, and others he intended for me alone. We talked about it. Even though he has undermined my efforts before, let's hope he doesn't do it again, or else I'll need professional help dealing with it. I need him to stop offering, buying, or bringing me food that I didn't ask for.
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Old 02-20-2019, 03:43 PM   #537
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It was a so-so day eating wise.
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Old 02-22-2019, 06:45 PM   #538
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Ate a bit too much today, will try to eat less tomorrow.
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Old 02-23-2019, 05:18 PM   #539
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Started stupid period today. It was late to start and now has a lot of brown spotting (sorry, TMI). It got me worried enough I bought a pregnancy test. I was a couple days late and had pink/brown spotting when I got pregnant with my daughter. H and I have not used birth control since I got my copper IUD removed around 2010 to try for a second baby. Secondary infertility, they determined after a year or so of good timing and no pregnancy, and neither of us wanted the stress and strain and cost of fertility treatment. Paid a couple extra dollars to get the store brand digital test (hate squinting at lines, wondering if you really see something or are just imagining it). Negative test. Starting to feel too old if I should get pregnant at 41, not to mention all the meds I am on. Thinking the overexercise (running) and/or weight loss may be making my cycle get wonky. Doubt its peri menopause; my mom was 60, maybe 61 when she started menopause.

Got up late today because H and I had to spend yesterday evening/early night cleaning the dust off the refrigerator coils behind the refrigerator because the refrigerator had stopped running. I think that fixed it. It was a huge pain though, had to remove everything from the fridge so H could pull it out from the built in nook, which is the size of the standard refrigerator in the 1970s, so a very cramped space on top of the kitchen being a galley kitchen.

Went to a math competition for my daughter this AM. She won 2nd place for her grade level, out of around 45 kids from all the district elementary schools (around 7 schools). Shes got those sensory issues, but in things like math, she is highly gifted.

Spent most of the afternoon reading. I will have to cook dinner soon and dont want to. If it were just me, Id make a sandwich or eat soup or something. I hate, hate, hate meal planning and cooking and buying groceries, but especially cooking, meal times just keep coming around and around and around again.
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Old 02-25-2019, 06:03 AM   #540
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Sticking to the program like glue. Weight loss, however, is slow to nonexistent. There are some factors beyond my control. One thing we found out--I really, REALLY should not have dairy. You don't want to know why. Having switched to plant-based protein, let's see what kind of effect it has on me.

Hubby no longer sabotaging things for me. Right now he's maybe not making the best choices, but that's his program, not mine. At least he's letting me do me, and if he's going to relapse, I don't have to go with him.
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