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Unread 03-19-2017, 06:08 PM   #1
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Default I want to know what this all is, please help? (Voices)

I am 14 years old, and I am really starting to suspect I have DID or at least something like it. First of all, I already know I dissasociate quite badly. My body is constantly numb all over and it has been for about 2 years. I already have mental health issues like depression and anxiety alongside Asbergers Syndrome and ADD.

Hear me out please.

apart from the dissasociation, I have something almost like alters, but they're not the same as alters. they're like more than one voice thinking. I know that everyone goes through that and its normal but this is different.

Two of the voices i was talking about have been there since i was very young. I never named them properly until now but they're not real names. Just 1 and 2. (yes thats what i called them. no proper name would sound right)

They hear what I think but I can't have a real conversation with them. They just hear my everyday thoughts and often discuss my opinion with each other. They comment on situations im in, on what i hear and see. they will sort of randomly say something a lot. often they begin talking (usually 1) when I'm thinking and I can hear them and myself at the same time. they must have first appeared when I was very very little because i dont remember a time without them. I'm not sure if this is a weird thing or its normal. I think maybe its just normal but im not sure.

1 seems like a negative thinker. their voice (they dont have a gender) is basically mine but slightly deeper with a slight accent change. they seem to speak from the left side of my head near my ear. sometimes i can feel a presence there like right now, maybe because im talking about them. sometimes they say judgemental or harsh things and they can be blunt sometimes. they are very rational. once something strange happened because i think it was like they "fronted" almost. i started thinking like them, talking like how they would inside my head and the voice that was "me" was like a secondary voice like how 1 and 2 are to me. i dont know what that was. i dont know if i can call it fronting but i think it was at least similar to that. it was only one time.

2 seems to be feminine but not all the time so I think she is maybe genderfluid or something. (so i will say either she or they) she seems to be the sort of kind hearted one. if 1 says anything judgemental she usually tells them they're being too harsh or something. she has not done what 1 did before. she seems quite pleasant. She speaks from the right side of my head. and she is rarely present. she is not here now as i type. but she very rarely is "here". I havent heard from her in months, maybe years. a possible name for her seems to be "Melody" for some reason?

Those were the first ones to appear. neither have apperences or real voices just my voice but slightly different. There are two more.

1. Ruby. She isnt a voice, though. she's more like a presence. shes just there but she doesnt speak. she is in the centre of my mind. her name was originally Sunset but I felt like that name was wrong and I had to call her Ruby. i felt her there when i typed this very vaguely. I know she has red hair, for some reason.

2. Chara. (pronounced like Kara. Please don't judge me because their name is the same as an Undertale character. I can't help it that thats their name i just felt like i had to call them that.)

Chara appeared recently. and they are quite confusing. they are genderless too like 1. I never get an age or even age range for anyone else but them. but they're definitely young. about 11-15. I know because of their voice. They talk from the back of my mind.

They have an American accent. I'm from England so always know when its them. everyone else who speaks is English too which is one reason why they're unusual. but thats not all, i think one time they "fronted" too, like 1.

they are a bit sarcastic and think a little bit pessimistically but not as much as 1. they have a sense of humor too. they actually do things like laugh at things i read even if i dont find it that funny myself. they have more personality than 1 or 2.
they usually comment on things that i think or things that happen.
but not in the same way as 1 or 2 because they don't have much personality, unlike Chara who does. they dont talk to 1 or 2 either. i can actually speak to them occasionally, VERY occcasionally. heres some things Chara has just said.

BAD LANGUAGE WARNING:

They just said something then when I was typing: "oh yeah, basically i'm a ****ing weirdo" and laughed, lmao. They know im writing this now. they are so much different from the others.

they're the type of person to say something like "well **** you too" after someone bumps into me or something (they swear a lot) or "what are you gonna do lol" if someone insulted me or something and yes, they would say the lol like loll. "bc they're a loser" - also said by Chara while i was typing this.
they kind of leave sometimes and come back.

(Chara keeps wanting me to write really dumb **** because they said it. No, Chara if I did that this entire post wouldnt be taken seriously Lmao.) I know they have brown hair.

Well thats Chara anyway the loser of the bunch - again, Chara.

Some of them come back for like a minute and then go for like 3 months. like 3

3. Someone with no name. (maybe i'll call him 3?) He's male, and i dont have an age range or apperence for him. His voice is echoy. I don't know if thats even possible.

I can have direct conversations with him, and he can speak to 1 and 2 and they have had real conversations. (he knows Ruby is there but...yeah you can't really get far in conversation with her.😂 but he tried) when hes actually around which is rarely. I don't know if he could talk to Chara because he hasnt been present since Chara arrived. I feel like he could though as he could speak to everyone the last time he was present.

He's another unique one like Chara is but he again is different. He can not only speak to me but everyone else. Not even Chara can do that (they only speak to me). He's very polite, caring and lively. He is always happy to cheer people up and is a fun person to have around. he's funny as hell but not in the sense that he tries to be, hes just kind of...oblivious? He sometimes doesnt read the situation. its kinda funny.

I don't know why this happens. maybe everyone has this happen to them and im over reacting. but I think the situation is very weird. I really don't know if I have a valid thing going on here or if im just normal.

I want any sort of answer, please. If anyone knows anything at all related to this situation please tell me. thanks.
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Unread 03-20-2017, 06:10 AM   #2
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Default Re: I want to know what this all is, please help? (Voices)

It doesn't sound like voices to me these have personalities and it seems like they speak for themselves.you could talk to a therapist but why would you want to.are they telling you to hurt yourself or other people.if not then you just have have friends inside your head.i hear voices well not so much cause of medication but mines weren't entirely nice to me telling me to do bad things.
If your real thing is about being looked at differently or being called crazy I'd say screw what others think.they are just stupid a good movie to watch by the way is called mental you'll love it.
Meds are no cure anyway they sometimes make things worse even.you do as you'd like but I don't see a problem here
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Unread 03-20-2017, 08:47 AM   #3
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Default Re: I want to know what this all is, please help? (Voices)

its not bc im scared of being seen different or anything i just want to know
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Unread 03-20-2017, 01:40 PM   #4
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Default Re: I want to know what this all is, please help? (Voices)

Quote:
Originally Posted by daedalianjoon View Post
I am 14 years old, and I am really starting to suspect I have DID or at least something like it. First of all, I already know I dissasociate quite badly. My body is constantly numb all over and it has been for about 2 years. I already have mental health issues like depression and anxiety alongside Asbergers Syndrome and ADD.

Hear me out please.

apart from the dissasociation, I have something almost like alters, but they're not the same as alters. they're like more than one voice thinking. I know that everyone goes through that and its normal but this is different.

Two of the voices i was talking about have been there since i was very young. I never named them properly until now but they're not real names. Just 1 and 2. (yes thats what i called them. no proper name would sound right)

They hear what I think but I can't have a real conversation with them. They just hear my everyday thoughts and often discuss my opinion with each other. They comment on situations im in, on what i hear and see. they will sort of randomly say something a lot. often they begin talking (usually 1) when I'm thinking and I can hear them and myself at the same time. they must have first appeared when I was very very little because i dont remember a time without them. I'm not sure if this is a weird thing or its normal. I think maybe its just normal but im not sure.

1 seems like a negative thinker. their voice (they dont have a gender) is basically mine but slightly deeper with a slight accent change. they seem to speak from the left side of my head near my ear. sometimes i can feel a presence there like right now, maybe because im talking about them. sometimes they say judgemental or harsh things and they can be blunt sometimes. they are very rational. once something strange happened because i think it was like they "fronted" almost. i started thinking like them, talking like how they would inside my head and the voice that was "me" was like a secondary voice like how 1 and 2 are to me. i dont know what that was. i dont know if i can call it fronting but i think it was at least similar to that. it was only one time.

2 seems to be feminine but not all the time so I think she is maybe genderfluid or something. (so i will say either she or they) she seems to be the sort of kind hearted one. if 1 says anything judgemental she usually tells them they're being too harsh or something. she has not done what 1 did before. she seems quite pleasant. She speaks from the right side of my head. and she is rarely present. she is not here now as i type. but she very rarely is "here". I havent heard from her in months, maybe years. a possible name for her seems to be "Melody" for some reason?

Those were the first ones to appear. neither have apperences or real voices just my voice but slightly different. There are two more.

1. Ruby. She isnt a voice, though. she's more like a presence. shes just there but she doesnt speak. she is in the centre of my mind. her name was originally Sunset but I felt like that name was wrong and I had to call her Ruby. i felt her there when i typed this very vaguely. I know she has red hair, for some reason.

2. Chara. (pronounced like Kara. Please don't judge me because their name is the same as an Undertale character. I can't help it that thats their name i just felt like i had to call them that.)

Chara appeared recently. and they are quite confusing. they are genderless too like 1. I never get an age or even age range for anyone else but them. but they're definitely young. about 11-15. I know because of their voice. They talk from the back of my mind.

They have an American accent. I'm from England so always know when its them. everyone else who speaks is English too which is one reason why they're unusual. but thats not all, i think one time they "fronted" too, like 1.

they are a bit sarcastic and think a little bit pessimistically but not as much as 1. they have a sense of humor too. they actually do things like laugh at things i read even if i dont find it that funny myself. they have more personality than 1 or 2.
they usually comment on things that i think or things that happen.
but not in the same way as 1 or 2 because they don't have much personality, unlike Chara who does. they dont talk to 1 or 2 either. i can actually speak to them occasionally, VERY occcasionally. heres some things Chara has just said.

BAD LANGUAGE WARNING:

They just said something then when I was typing: "oh yeah, basically i'm a ****ing weirdo" and laughed, lmao. They know im writing this now. they are so much different from the others.

they're the type of person to say something like "well **** you too" after someone bumps into me or something (they swear a lot) or "what are you gonna do lol" if someone insulted me or something and yes, they would say the lol like loll. "bc they're a loser" - also said by Chara while i was typing this.
they kind of leave sometimes and come back.

(Chara keeps wanting me to write really dumb **** because they said it. No, Chara if I did that this entire post wouldnt be taken seriously Lmao.) I know they have brown hair.

Well thats Chara anyway the loser of the bunch - again, Chara.

Some of them come back for like a minute and then go for like 3 months. like 3

3. Someone with no name. (maybe i'll call him 3?) He's male, and i dont have an age range or apperence for him. His voice is echoy. I don't know if thats even possible.

I can have direct conversations with him, and he can speak to 1 and 2 and they have had real conversations. (he knows Ruby is there but...yeah you can't really get far in conversation with her.😂 but he tried) when hes actually around which is rarely. I don't know if he could talk to Chara because he hasnt been present since Chara arrived. I feel like he could though as he could speak to everyone the last time he was present.

He's another unique one like Chara is but he again is different. He can not only speak to me but everyone else. Not even Chara can do that (they only speak to me). He's very polite, caring and lively. He is always happy to cheer people up and is a fun person to have around. he's funny as hell but not in the sense that he tries to be, hes just kind of...oblivious? He sometimes doesnt read the situation. its kinda funny.

I don't know why this happens. maybe everyone has this happen to them and im over reacting. but I think the situation is very weird. I really don't know if I have a valid thing going on here or if im just normal.

I want any sort of answer, please. If anyone knows anything at all related to this situation please tell me. thanks.
wow this is a very long post. nothing wrong with it just noticed you were new and then reading the post discovered its not a quick short one that I have come to expect after noticing someone is new.

going to take this according to what jumped out in your post at me....

Quote:
Originally Posted by daedalianjoon View Post
I want any sort of answer, please. If anyone knows anything at all related to this situation please tell me. thanks.
Im sorry but you wont find definite answers here. the only way to find out for sure what this is called in you is by contacting your own treatment providers..

you mentioned in your post that you have

Quote:
Originally Posted by daedalianjoon View Post
depression and anxiety alongside Asbergers Syndrome and ADD.
my suggestion is to just continue going with what ever you have already been diagnosed as, reason I say this is because having voices and what seems like personalities in ones head talking on the right, center and left sides of the head can be many different things. only a treatment provider can say what that is and in you you are diagnosed with what I quoted from your post.

I cant diagnose you but I can tell you that what you posted does happen with these mental disorders that you listed, if you were located here where I am.

what else I can tell you is that with in me DID did not present as alters talking on one side of my head or the other or centralized. with me it was more like people normally think. confusing I know. to understand this take a moment to think about what you are going to do today. dont focus on the voices just your own natural thought of something you are going to do today. now feel how your normal every day kind of thought has no direction or location, it just is there? thats how it was for me, my alters were just there they did not have a designated left side of my brain or right side of my brain or central part of my brain.

In me I did have the kind of altered personalities that comment and judge everything and sometimes took over my voice and behaviors. in me my treatment providers called them introjects and ego states (a kind of alter but not concidered a dissociative type alter here where I live, more of a normal everyone has them but in me they were more defined)
__________________
My location's (USA) list of mental disorders (DSM 5)
http://forums.psychcentral.com/other...disorders.html

my locations (USA) Dissociative Disorders diagnostic criteriahttp://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...s-dsm-5-a.html

Some places outside the USA and some USA insurance forms require the ICD codes. though it is less detailed and a bit different in wording it is the same criteria as the DSM 5 http://www.icd10data.com/ICD10CM/Cod...48/F44-/F44.81

Sense of Agency is a new term associated with DID in my location (USA) http://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...se-agency.html

Reality Testing is a new diagnostic criteria for dissociative disorders here in the USA http://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...ml#post5180743

Revolving door http://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...ving-door.html

Testing procedures in the USA and .......Sample tests (not used for diagnosis purposes).......
https://forums.psychcentral.com/diss...disorders.html
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