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Old 01-29-2019, 02:38 PM #1
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Trig It's a dark day

I am very stressed out right now. I feel like I need to cut to bring the release I need. My wife found her mom dead late this morning. As her husband I have to remain strong for her. I don't know how I am going to do that.
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Last edited by Merlin; 01-29-2019 at 05:12 PM. Reason: Trigger icon added
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Old 01-29-2019, 03:13 PM #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Humpty Dumpty View Post
I am very stressed out right now. I feel like I need to cut to bring the release I need. My wife found her mom dead late this morning. As her husband I have to remain strong for her. I don't know how I am going to do that.
O.M.G. Please, please don't hurt yourself.

The first thing that occurs to me is to slow way down, breathe, and let your wife handle things as she is going to. Some people get really emotional, some people are pretty numb at first. Of course you need to be there for her, because this is not about you. Just be there and let her talk if she wants to. There's really nothing you can do, per se, to make things different.

Can't tell whether this occurred there at your home or somewhere else, but when someone dies there are always a lot of official hoops to jump through which you will be taking care of probably for some time, but the first thing is, like you said, just to BE there.

My most sincere condolences.

Many hugs...:group hug:
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Old 01-29-2019, 04:19 PM #3
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It's a dark day
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Old 01-29-2019, 09:42 PM #4
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Anything I can do?
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Old 01-29-2019, 09:53 PM #5
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Anything I can do?
Thanks, but no. Today has been a difficult day and there is a long road ahead. So many things we have to take care of and none of it will be quick.
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Old 01-29-2019, 10:00 PM #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopey View Post

Can't tell whether this occurred there at your home or somewhere else, but when someone dies there are always a lot of official hoops to jump through which you will be taking care of probably for some time, but the first thing is, like you said, just to BE there.

My most sincere condolences.

Many hugs...:group hug:
Her mom lived alone. Hadn't been answering her phone so my wife went to check on her.
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Old 01-29-2019, 10:16 PM #7
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Her mom lived alone. Hadn't been answering her phone so my wife went to check on her.
So very sorry, Humpty Dumpty. Hang in there. Take it a few moments at a time if you can.
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Old 01-29-2019, 10:54 PM #8
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Default Re: It's a dark day

I'm so sorry.


I agree with Mopey -- I don't expect people to fix me or my problems; I just want someone to be there. You don't *have* to be strong. Far better to be there and weak, than strong and absent or distant. It will be enough.
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Old 01-31-2019, 04:16 PM #9
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^ I agree with Ceph.
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Old 01-31-2019, 04:22 PM #10
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Default Re: It's a dark day

I am trying to fight back the emotions. I just feel like several times it was right there & the dam was about to break. Yet some how I managed to keep it from that.
This was only my mother in law. I wasn't particularly close to the woman. I didn't hate her either. Don't get me wrong. She just had a bad attitude and I didn't like being around her.
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