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Unread 06-22-2017, 05:39 PM   #1
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Default Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

Last thread has reached over 100 pages so here is a new thread
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Unread 06-22-2017, 05:49 PM   #2
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

The computer systems at work are finally all go now! So it makes being at work much better. Was very busy today because of catching up with work. Feeling mediocre to a little bit below that. Tomorrow is Friday and I'll be glad when Saturday comes.
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Unread 06-22-2017, 07:39 PM   #3
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

I had a pretty okay day. I woke up and went to work, where I had a better time communicating. I asked a lot of questions and made some light hearted, humorous conversation. I also think I am able to get mentored more now.

The funny thing is that I get along better with the men than the women, which I did not expect. It seems to me that they are calmer and less socially fussy. That may be a stereotype, but I really think this is the case with the people I'm working with.

On my way home I went to the grocery store and bought almond milk, ice cream, and very expensive organic hot dogs I will buy some veggies at the farmers market and another herb plant. I love my basil plant so much!

Then from the grocery store to my apt I walked by this girl who smelled really good.

Seems like all it takes is a huge breakdown the night before

but I spent so time learning today that I didn't get all my tasks done, so I now have to get through 78 pages of mind numbing proofreading!
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Unread 06-22-2017, 11:09 PM   #4
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

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Originally Posted by emptynightmare View Post
The funny thing is that I get along better with the men than the women, which I did not expect. It seems to me that they are calmer and less socially fussy. That may be a stereotype, but I really think this is the case with the people I'm working with.
I feel very much the same way. I get along very well at my job with others, but there seems to be two women who are upper middle aged that I have problems with. They seem very sensitive and would never do anything to help me. But they expect me to help them. I think that they have very bad marriages. They act miserable all of the time. I hope and pray that they will go away soon. But as luck has it, if they do go, then they will be replaced. It always happens. It seems like the bad people get replaced easier than the good people do.
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Unread 06-22-2017, 11:29 PM   #5
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

I just saw this thread. I'm so low right now and nothing seems to help. My binge eating is out of control because I'm so depressed. I think I'm punishing myself. I don't deserve to have what I want. I am a selfish person.
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Unread 06-23-2017, 02:29 AM   #6
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

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Originally Posted by tippitippi View Post
I just saw this thread. I'm so low right now and nothing seems to help. My binge eating is out of control because I'm so depressed. I think I'm punishing myself. I don't deserve to have what I want. I am a selfish person.
Hello, I know these feelings. Today was a binge eating day for me too. All day I would have these anxiety micro-attacks full of fear and self-doubt.
You're not a selfish person, I know that.
People want things, it's what we do.
Take some time to consider what you want and think through what you are going to do to get what you want. (Sometimes the thing to do is wait for a bit.)
You are not selfish, or undeserving.
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Unread 06-23-2017, 03:26 AM   #7
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

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Originally Posted by tippitippi View Post
I just saw this thread. I'm so low right now and nothing seems to help. My binge eating is out of control because I'm so depressed. I think I'm punishing myself. I don't deserve to have what I want. I am a selfish person.
Hi,

Life has its ups and downs. The brain has "reward centres" I call happy zones, and "punishment centres" I call sad zones.

In the caveman's era it was easy, when he got an antelope for supper or mated with his partner he felt happy (his reward centre was stimulated). When he did not get a mate or he did not get the antelope and was hungry then his sad zone was stimulated (his punishment centre was stimulated). So there was no mystery.

In the modern era life is simpler we are not in threat every day of dying of hunger, our life is not in direct danger, we often have a partner so that is not an issue either however psychologically life is more complex. The neurotransmitters wander from the happy zone to the sad zone for no reason.

If you feel sad and you are hungry then it is a no brainer, you need food, when you eat then you feel happy. But if you have every thing (i.e. not hungry, don't have any life threatening issues) and you feel down then you panic because there is no reason for you to feel down.

My technique is to just go ahead. Let me explain.

There are three states of mind
1. Feeling High
2. Feeling Normal
3. Feeling Low

When some people feel normal (2.) then they say "Oh life is boring so I need some excitement" so they binge eat, or do drugs, cheat on their partner, or simply party because they need a high.

When then feel high (1.) then they just do more of the habits I mentioned above because well they feel so great they might as well make the best of it.

When they feel low (3.) then they do the above habits also because they feel so bad and they need something to relieve the pain.

What I do is as follows:

If I feel average (2.) then I do my project, I like to write and read so I just do that. Since the neurotransmitters move at their own free will then I will either feel high, or low after this. Now If I feel high then I will link my reading/writing to me feeling good (like Pavlov's dogs) and get a habit of reading/writing.
If I feel low, then I will still continue to read and write and then after some time the neurotransmitters will leave that sad zone and I will feel great again so reenforcing that my "good habit" i.e. reading and writing makes me feel good.

Kind Regards
Jason
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Unread 06-23-2017, 09:45 AM   #8
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

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Originally Posted by tippitippi View Post
I just saw this thread. I'm so low right now and nothing seems to help. My binge eating is out of control because I'm so depressed. I think I'm punishing myself. I don't deserve to have what I want. I am a selfish person.
I'm sorry you're having such a tough time and are feeling low right now. I wanted to lend my support and let you know I'm here if you need to talk. Do you see a tdoc or pdoc? Best wishes.
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Unread 06-23-2017, 10:18 AM   #9
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

Not depressed, but not content with myself yet. I'm working on things that I need to do, set goals in my life that would make me feel more satisfied with myself. I'm a mother, mother's tend to think of their children as first in their lives. I really am believing much of my depression came from neglecting my own needs, for time and space, and to enjoy the things I enjoy. I believe that things will work out for good in the end. I pray for my children, that is all I think I can do at this moment, and think constantly of their futures and what I'd like to see for them.
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Unread 06-23-2017, 10:57 AM   #10
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Default Re: Daily Check-In Thread: Ups & Downs #21

I'm going to orientation with Z for 2 days in mid-July. The parents & students sleep in the dorms. Everything we've done with this school is top notch. I'm getting less depressed and more excited. It finally dawned on me that she'll get a quality education with no student loan debt. I feel we've been blessed.

It's a sunny day so I'll get to go float in the pool. I also feel like doing some cleaning. A good day so far.

Hope everyone is having a good day and hugs to everyone who is struggling.
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