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Old 02-14-2019, 03:06 PM   #1
svgandhi
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Default Anger at being typecast

I have had anger issues for the past several years. I am in a difficult situation in which people have been stereotyping me as a troublemaker. Years ago, I had bad posture and wasn't really integrated into society well. The result was that when I decided to correct my posture I would turn my head in a way that made people think I was trying to annoy or harass them. Now, I have corrected my posture but have developed a self-image of someone who is basically a misfit or loser.

A lot of the time when I walk past someone they will quickly turn to watch me to see if I am looking at them even though I have not done that sort of thing for years. This can be very mentally tiring. Also, since people are so focused on me they interpret every thing I do negatively regardless of my intent.

I am working with a counselor who helps with social anxiety. Whenever I start the day I have high hopes but almost all the time I come home angry with other people for how they behaved towards me. I spend a long time trying to get back control of my own security and psyche. The anger yesterday was on a level higher than I am used to. I have been taking part in a 30 day challenge in which I am not supposed to succumb to exits (such as Internet videos, porn, or comfort foods) when I get stressed but I wonder if this isn't good for my anger issues. Does anyone else have any suggestions for this?
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Old 02-14-2019, 04:35 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by svgandhi View Post
I have had anger issues for the past several years. I am in a difficult situation in which people have been stereotyping me as a troublemaker. Years ago, I had bad posture and wasn't really integrated into society well. The result was that when I decided to correct my posture I would turn my head in a way that made people think I was trying to annoy or harass them. Now, I have corrected my posture but have developed a self-image of someone who is basically a misfit or loser.
What behaviors have you exhibited that would cause people to stereotype you?
Quote:
A lot of the time when I walk past someone they will quickly turn to watch me to see if I am looking at them even though I have not done that sort of thing for years. This can be very mentally tiring. Also, since people are so focused on me they interpret every thing I do negatively regardless of my intent.
Please do not take offense to this but it sounds like you are very consumed by what you think other people are thinking of you and what they are doing to you. People may not be that focused on you. How do you know that they are? Did people just up and decide you were a troublemaker with a negative rep? Could there be anything you can think of that would have given them a specific reason to not like you? I find it hard to believe that you are just going about your business while all these people are looking at you and watching you to the point that they deem you harassing.


Quote:
I am working with a counselor who helps with social anxiety. Whenever I start the day I have high hopes but almost all the time I come home angry with other people for how they behaved towards me. I spend a long time trying to get back control of my own security and psyche. The anger yesterday was on a level higher than I am used to. I have been taking part in a 30 day challenge in which I am not supposed to succumb to exits (such as Internet videos, porn, or comfort foods) when I get stressed but I wonder if this isn't good for my anger issues. Does anyone else have any suggestions for this?
You keep saying other people are watching you and talking about you. You say it is because of how other people behaved towards you is what causes the anger. To say it bluntly.. You are just not that important. And neither am I and neither are most people. Do you really think other people spend their time thinking of ways to be mean and bother you? I think you make a lot of assumptions. What is your part in all of this?
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Old 02-20-2019, 10:01 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by svgandhi View Post
I have had anger issues for the past several years. I am in a difficult situation in which people have been stereotyping me as a troublemaker. Years ago, I had bad posture and wasn't really integrated into society well. The result was that when I decided to correct my posture I would turn my head in a way that made people think I was trying to annoy or harass them. Now, I have corrected my posture but have developed a self-image of someone who is basically a misfit or loser.

A lot of the time when I walk past someone they will quickly turn to watch me to see if I am looking at them even though I have not done that sort of thing for years. This can be very mentally tiring. Also, since people are so focused on me they interpret every thing I do negatively regardless of my intent.

I am working with a counselor who helps with social anxiety. Whenever I start the day I have high hopes but almost all the time I come home angry with other people for how they behaved towards me. I spend a long time trying to get back control of my own security and psyche. The anger yesterday was on a level higher than I am used to. I have been taking part in a 30 day challenge in which I am not supposed to succumb to exits (such as Internet videos, porn, or comfort foods) when I get stressed but I wonder if this isn't good for my anger issues. Does anyone else have any suggestions for this?
For dealing with your anger, I would recommend talking with family and exercising. I've never been a fan of exercising, but when I used to have more anger flare ups in the past, this helped tremendously reduce my anger. There is one thing to keep in mind if you are exercising at a gym. You may be nervous and think people are watching you, but everyone at the gym usually just wants everyone else around them to be safe and achieve their goal.

Also, I wanted to add something from my personal experience. I used to think throughout high school that I was watched by many, if not all of the students. I was paranoid about my appearance because of this and I was very cautious about almost all of my actions. Well, a year or so after finishing high school, I realized I had mostly flew under the radar for almost every student. No one knew who I was! I realized it was all in my head. Just something to consider, you may not be getting as much attention as you perceive you are.

Hope this helps! Sorry if I said anything bad, I'm new to this!
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Old 02-21-2019, 12:33 AM   #4
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I also have something to add here, I used to be very self conscious and paranoid, then I found out I have schitzophrenia and bipolar. my son has social anxiety disorder also. maybe you may be suffering from one or another diagnosed problems?
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Old 02-22-2019, 02:22 PM   #5
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Old 02-26-2019, 05:21 AM   #6
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Default Re: Anger at being typecast

have you tried to figure out where your anger comes from? are you angry at something or someone? maybe yourself? remember most people are too busy with themselves to even notice other people around them, even those that look scared, or angry or sad, it's likely nothing to do with you, they may even have a greater fear of being judged than you feel
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