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Unread 08-08-2017, 01:39 PM   #1
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Default How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

Today, or most of it at least, I'm at a real low. A good bye cruel world low. I'm sure everyone has been there. How do you pull yourself out? I'm low of ideas and thought maybe this would help me and another person here or there.

FYI, I'm trying this, posting here. I know this has a chance to get no replies and backfire but you never know.
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Unread 08-08-2017, 03:30 PM   #2
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

Distraction, distraction, distraction.

I don't try to make too big a leap out of depression. I've never gone from flat to flying. I have to sit up, crawl, walk, and run first. I find something a few emotional steps higher than where I am and try to focus into that.


1. Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2. Passion
3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
5. Optimism
6. Hopefulness
7. Contentment
8. Boredom
9. Pessimism
10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11. Overwhelm
12. Disappointment
13. Doubt
14. Worry
15. Blame
16. Discouragement
17. Anger
18. Revenge
19. Hatred/Rage
20. Jealousy
21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

For instance, I always know things are getting better when I start getting angry at everybody. Anger feels more empowering than depression, so I know I've moved up the scale. While I'm still angry, I start blaming people for crap they've pulled. Then I move through disappointment and ranting about life in general until I'm bored with it all and once I'm bored, I put on funny You Tube videos and feel better.

Now, if I tried to laugh while I'm still all the way down in depression, it wouldn't work. Too big a jump. I've got a whole list of stand up comedians who reflect this scale perfectly--when I'm angry I listen to Lewis Black, when I'm bored I listen to Jim Gaffigan, when I feel better I listen to Kathleen Madigan, and by the time I'm pretty happy, I listen to John Pinette. If I'm really deep down, action movies and instant karma videos on You Tube are pretty distracting as long as they aren't too violent.

This whole process can take one day or twenty, the key is to just keep plugging away at it and don't get down on yourself for getting down on yourself. When in doubt, nap. You'll get there.
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Unread 08-08-2017, 11:03 PM   #3
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

Have no idea how to pull myself out of it, but I will say not to fight it because I know I have made it much worse over and over again.

I also know I make it worse by listening to my father say pull up your bridges. Suck it up and be a man or any other recording that plays over and over again in my head only creates guilt on top of depression. Really anyone that does not understand depression and has never experienced the true depth it takes you. All good intentions from people, but they have no idea when they tell you just to take a walk and everything will be better.
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Unread 08-10-2017, 02:12 AM   #4
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

Did you come up with that list of emotions yourself? This just is amazing. It's like a map. I've been on a bad day and a half, and just waiting for it to end. Well this is so helpful to me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by awhellnaw View Post
Distraction, distraction, distraction.

I don't try to make too big a leap out of depression. I've never gone from flat to flying. I have to sit up, crawl, walk, and run first. I find something a few emotional steps higher than where I am and try to focus into that.


1. Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2. Passion
3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
5. Optimism
6. Hopefulness
7. Contentment
8. Boredom
9. Pessimism
10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11. Overwhelm
12. Disappointment
13. Doubt
14. Worry
15. Blame
16. Discouragement
17. Anger
18. Revenge
19. Hatred/Rage
20. Jealousy
21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

For instance, I always know things are getting better when I start getting angry at everybody. Anger feels more empowering than depression, so I know I've moved up the scale. While I'm still angry, I start blaming people for crap they've pulled. Then I move through disappointment and ranting about life in general until I'm bored with it all and once I'm bored, I put on funny You Tube videos and feel better.

Now, if I tried to laugh while I'm still all the way down in depression, it wouldn't work. Too big a jump. I've got a whole list of stand up comedians who reflect this scale perfectly--when I'm angry I listen to Lewis Black, when I'm bored I listen to Jim Gaffigan, when I feel better I listen to Kathleen Madigan, and by the time I'm pretty happy, I listen to John Pinette. If I'm really deep down, action movies and instant karma videos on You Tube are pretty distracting as long as they aren't too violent.

This whole process can take one day or twenty, the key is to just keep plugging away at it and don't get down on yourself for getting down on yourself. When in doubt, nap. You'll get there.
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Unread 08-10-2017, 08:15 AM   #5
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

Thanks for this awhellnaw! I love it. I'm more aware of my mood since I was told about BPD. It is very up and down. Different than my bipolar though. So hard to describe.

Your list is awesome. I hope it help people.


Quote:
Originally Posted by awhellnaw View Post
Distraction, distraction, distraction.

I don't try to make too big a leap out of depression. I've never gone from flat to flying. I have to sit up, crawl, walk, and run first. I find something a few emotional steps higher than where I am and try to focus into that.


1. Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2. Passion
3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
5. Optimism
6. Hopefulness
7. Contentment
8. Boredom
9. Pessimism
10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11. Overwhelm
12. Disappointment
13. Doubt
14. Worry
15. Blame
16. Discouragement
17. Anger
18. Revenge
19. Hatred/Rage
20. Jealousy
21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

For instance, I always know things are getting better when I start getting angry at everybody. Anger feels more empowering than depression, so I know I've moved up the scale. While I'm still angry, I start blaming people for crap they've pulled. Then I move through disappointment and ranting about life in general until I'm bored with it all and once I'm bored, I put on funny You Tube videos and feel better.

Now, if I tried to laugh while I'm still all the way down in depression, it wouldn't work. Too big a jump. I've got a whole list of stand up comedians who reflect this scale perfectly--when I'm angry I listen to Lewis Black, when I'm bored I listen to Jim Gaffigan, when I feel better I listen to Kathleen Madigan, and by the time I'm pretty happy, I listen to John Pinette. If I'm really deep down, action movies and instant karma videos on You Tube are pretty distracting as long as they aren't too violent.

This whole process can take one day or twenty, the key is to just keep plugging away at it and don't get down on yourself for getting down on yourself. When in doubt, nap. You'll get there.
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Unread 08-12-2017, 08:52 PM   #6
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

The list is the Emotional Scale according to Abraham-Hicks, who do a great job of teaching people how to navigate their emotions and focus their thoughts to live their best lives. If you search "Abraham-Hicks" in You Tube, you'll find over a thousand free videos.

To be clear, it's not a religion but a way of thinking and focusing. People of all faiths use it, I recommend simply trying out the parts that make sense to you. If it doesn't feel right, there are plenty of other things out there, you'll find something.

What I'm focusing on right now is their point that beliefs are just thoughts that I keep thinking. My beliefs seem powerful and real because I've practiced thinking them so long. But I am not chained, I can choose to think other thoughts at any time. Then, I can start training my mind, and my life, in another direction. It's like that saying: "If you think you can or you think you can't, you're right." Whichever direction you focus, that's where you'll go, just like steering a car.

It really does work, it just takes time and repetition, kind of like lifting weights to get stronger. It gets easier as you go along. They also taught me about distraction as a tool. You Tube works for that, too!

Last edited by awhellnaw; 08-12-2017 at 09:15 PM.
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Unread 08-13-2017, 02:33 AM   #7
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

When that happens to me I remember that i have been there *many* times before and I have never acted on my suicidal thoughts even if I really wanted to. It sucks for a few days, just like chronic physical pain, but it usually fades into something different soon enough.
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Unread 08-13-2017, 02:26 PM   #8
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

I have found the best way to get out of depression is to accept that part of it is out of your control. Sometimes it is circumstancial (may or may not be in your control), sometimes it is chemical imbalances (effected by food, exercise, sleep, etc). Sometimes it is impossible to know what it is.

Sometimes I can utilize all my skills and still feel depressed. It could be weather.

The important thing to do is recognize the warning signs for depression and make an effort to counterbalance it; no matter how small - awareness is the first step. Don't isolate, be around people it can be a wonderful way to distract. Sometimes when we are depressed we spend an awful lot of time in our heads playing the same negative story over and over again; which in turn, reinforces it to repeat. Being around others gives us an opportunity to forget about our own problems and focus on others; even if only a short period of time.

I love music. It can change my moods.

I find that I judge myself for being depressed when sometimes, I need to allow myself to feel depressed. It is important to cry, to curl up in a ball from time to time and feel sad. Life is hard. Period. We can't always expect to be happy.

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Unread 08-15-2017, 03:54 PM   #9
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

First of all distraction, doing anything you can to stop thinking negative things. Then self soothing e.g eating ice cream, drinking your favourite drink, listening to music, face masks, bubble baths, painting your nails etc all help to lift your mood a little.
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Unread 08-16-2017, 10:04 AM   #10
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Default Re: How do you pull yourself out of deep lows?

I have now found that music is a key to me stopping a spiral downward. It doesn't always work but it has had the highest effectiveness of all the methods.
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