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Old 10-11-2018, 03:47 AM   #441
Wild Coyote
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Originally Posted by Innerzone View Post
BP-wise, fine. But my BDD got particularly triggered this afternoon and has been consuming me. I hate it so much. Hate myself so much. All I want is to be normal. It seems utterly intractable. Decades and it's actually worse. Doesn't seem to matter what I do. Been on the edge of tears it overwhelms me so much.
Heavy defeated sigh.
I am so very sorry.
You have been through a lot lately.

Thinking of you.

WC
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Old 10-11-2018, 07:23 AM   #442
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BeyondtheRainbow, I hope your kitty's food works out and the benzo reduction doesn't exacerbate your anxiety. I had to recently go back on a little Ativan after two weeks off of it, and yet years ago when I had been on a much higher dose, a small reduction oddly seemed to improve my overall situation.
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Tegretol XR generic (1200 mg)
Lamictal generic (100 mg)
Seroquel XR generic (lowered to 500 mg from 600 mg on Oct 9, 2018)
Klonopin generic (0.5 mg)
Ativan generic (0.25 mg and hopefully soon just prn)

Others: Propranolol (40 mg), Synthroid (150 mcg), multi-vitamin/iron supplement
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Old 10-11-2018, 07:41 AM   #443
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Hi--I'm doing okay for the moment.

We bought a new range and was supposed to get it today. Lowe's did not have it. Our HOA decided to schedule repaving the whole complex this entire week and didn't tell anyone until Monday when they were taking up the old asphalt. No street parking until next week, so no range delivery either. My husband is getting a CT scan tomorrow afternoon, then will try to fit the new stove in our SUV afterwards. He thinks he can do it.

The installer has started installing our new shower door but started another project much further away so don't know when he'll finish it--that is if he puts the door on the right way. I just hope it's done before we go camping in 1 weeks.

Like I said, I'm okay...but the hits keep on coming.

Love and hugs to you all.
Wow! Lots of trials!

I hope your husband's CT scan is okay or somehow helps.
Good luck with the new stove and the shower door!


WC
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Old 10-11-2018, 07:52 AM   #444
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Have been awake since 1 a.m. I am jacked up on asthma meds. The virus has totally irritated airways, so asthma meds are needed to calm things down.

It's been raining most of the night and is expected to rain all day. We might go to a movie.

The weather -- it is October -- is exacerbating my Psoriatic Arthritis. My feet are screaming! Happens every October.


I hope everyone has a good day!
Love to All!
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May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths.


Kutless - What Faith Can Do
https://youtu.be/u1JBSQMkQEo
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Old 10-11-2018, 07:55 AM   #445
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Have been awake since 1 a.m. I am jacked up on asthma meds. The virus has totally irritated airways, so asthma meds are needed to calm things down.

It's been raining most of the night and is expected to rain all day. We might go to a movie.

The weather -- it is October -- is exacerbating my Psoriatic Arthritis. My feet are screaming! Happens every October.


I hope everyone has a good day!
Love to All!
Awwww, no fair this should all pile on! Now where's my magic wand to shoo it all away? (You know I would if I could!) Hope things ease soon.
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Old 10-11-2018, 08:01 AM   #446
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Awwww, no fair this should all pile on! Now where's my magic wand to shoo it all away? (You know I would if I could!) Hope things ease soon.
Thanks, you are so sweet!

I've been hoping to read a review of the recent concert.

I have seen mostly local performances this summer.

Thanks again!
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May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths.


Kutless - What Faith Can Do
https://youtu.be/u1JBSQMkQEo
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Old 10-11-2018, 09:14 AM   #447
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Since my psychiatrist lowered my Seroquel XR, my hypersomnia has eased. I'm now getting the normal eight to nine hours of sleep. I also feel my mood is starting to lift a little bit.

Hubby will be home this weekend, but we will be repairing our deck. It will be a lot of work. My brother is supposed to help us, but he has yet to call me to say which day he can come. I'll have to call him tomorrow if I don't hear from him today. I don't want him to forget about it.

Last weekend my dad called and said he wanted to visit me for a couple of hours this week. I told him to call me early in the week to let me know when to expect him. Well, it's Thursday and I'm yet to hear from him, as well. Last night I confess I got angry (there's been a lot of anger towards him for a while for justifiable reasons) and left a message sort of scolding him. Maybe he won't call back. Too bad! He seems to think his cafe and bar buddies, and new girlfriend are more important than his children and remaining grandson. I've gone to Al-Anon a few times, but never in consecutive weeks. They pretty much suggest I stop wishing for his behavior to change. My psychiatrist says the same. Pretty much it's like accepting a sort of death.
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I have Bipolar type 1

Tegretol XR generic (1200 mg)
Lamictal generic (100 mg)
Seroquel XR generic (lowered to 500 mg from 600 mg on Oct 9, 2018)
Klonopin generic (0.5 mg)
Ativan generic (0.25 mg and hopefully soon just prn)

Others: Propranolol (40 mg), Synthroid (150 mcg), multi-vitamin/iron supplement
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Old 10-11-2018, 09:32 AM   #448
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The morning has gotten cooler here; I love it. The 25 mg trazodone worked again, but I am still very tired.

I went on a walk but an actual normal length/time walk of 45 minutes.

I am hurting a lot from fibro, and (not from fibro) a bit along my ulcer scar which is a good 4-5" long, which is a little concerning. I was going to vacuum today, but I will wait until tomorrow.

I am going to soak in an Epsom salt bath and then maybe infuse one of my essential oils for relaxation or stress and try to finish the book I have been on the last 50 pages of for awhile now. It is harder to read, the pages and paragraphs are long...ironic since I write long posts.

Maybe look for simple, cheap craft ideas on Pinterest and start writing down ideas of things my daughter wants to do with me.

I am so relieved my daughter just doesn't want to shut me out. When she was receptive, I told her I want to spend more time with her, just doing things the 2 of us. She seemed to be happy about this idea, so my new goal is to keep my end as promised.
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Bupropion 150 XR, Seroquel 400 mg, Lamictal 400 mg, Clonazepam 1 mg 4/day, Clonidine 0.3 mg, Propanolol 10 mg 3/day, Buspar 30 mg 2/day, Adderall 20 mg, Protonix 20 mg (post-ulcer med), Gabapentin 100 mg 3/day (fibro), Tizandine 4 mg 4/day (fibro)

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
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Old 10-11-2018, 12:51 PM   #449
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I agree with the above. The heart pounding though sounds like anxiety or even panic.
Thanks to both of you. Its no wonder. Im at my case manager's to go over this paperwork. Ill mention this although pdoc just raised my wellbutrin.
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[COLOR=NAVY]
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*Schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type*

Haldol 10 mg
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Most recent episodes:

Paranoia
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Hypomanic
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Psychotic
(June, 2018)

Manic
(September, 2016)
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Old 10-11-2018, 01:26 PM   #450
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdDancer View Post
Since my psychiatrist lowered my Seroquel XR, my hypersomnia has eased. I'm now getting the normal eight to nine hours of sleep. I also feel my mood is starting to lift a little bit.

Hubby will be home this weekend, but we will be repairing our deck. It will be a lot of work. My brother is supposed to help us, but he has yet to call me to say which day he can come. I'll have to call him tomorrow if I don't hear from him today. I don't want him to forget about it.

Last weekend my dad called and said he wanted to visit me for a couple of hours this week. I told him to call me early in the week to let me know when to expect him. Well, it's Thursday and I'm yet to hear from him, as well. Last night I confess I got angry (there's been a lot of anger towards him for a while for justifiable reasons) and left a message sort of scolding him. Maybe he won't call back. Too bad! He seems to think his cafe and bar buddies, and new girlfriend are more important than his children and remaining grandson. I've gone to Al-Anon a few times, but never in consecutive weeks. They pretty much suggest I stop wishing for his behavior to change. My psychiatrist says the same. Pretty much it's like accepting a sort of death.
I am glad you are sleeping better.

I understand at least some of how you feel. I had spent years in Alanon. It's not easy to give up hoping some people in our lives will change. I have had to do this with several people. I am deeply saddened by their choices and their priorities; yet, their choices seem to be their preferences. They seem more happy than not. Sometimes I think I know better than they do as to what will make their life happier; I truly do not know. I want them to "shape up" and to show they care. They don't want my perspectives, concerns and definitely not my advice.

Live and let live is one of the mottos. It can be a tough one to live by, especially when we care. It's very hard to let go sometimes. I had to learn it is possible to let go and still care about people

Father-daughter relationships are very important. It sounds like you want to see more of him? Maybe you two can firm up plans in the future? Would he be less apt to cancel that way?

I hope the deck repairs go smoothly.


WC
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May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths.


Kutless - What Faith Can Do
https://youtu.be/u1JBSQMkQEo
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