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Old 05-21-2013, 06:11 AM   #11
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

Quote:
Originally Posted by wotchermuggle View Post
Being Married to a Person with Depression or Bipolar: 6 Survival Tips | World of Psychology

I found this to be so demeaning.

There are no links to the statistics used in this article.....but 90% failure rate for marriages? WTF?
While it is certainly horrifying stats, I have to admit I've been divorced 4 times. Married/divorced twice to the same man, and I'm reunited with #4... So not quite as horrid as it sounds but...

...the common denominator in my failed relationships is me. I'm newly diagnosed as having BP1, so it wasn't like that was thrown around all over the place. Although it was mentioned a few times that I could have it, but I always denied that possibility. I am very codependent and don't find myself in the healthiest of relationships.

I would love for my husband now to be open, supportive, read books, listen when I talk about it etc, but it's just not his style. I have to work on changing myself, not him.

I am going to BDSA meetings that also has workshops to address things like anger, self esteem, etc. so I think knowing that I have a disorder I can be more proactive. I have a disorder, but it doesn't have to define me or ruin my relationships.

I want to strive to be a healthier person - in all areas of my life - and all my relationships, not just marital.

My morning thoughts.
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Old 05-21-2013, 07:48 AM   #12
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

As far as I can tell, this woman just has opinions and no real training or knowledge. I LOL'd after reading what she said about why she doesn't mention her qualifications on her own webpage:

About « Therese J. Borchard

I guess she feels that having BP made her an expert. She is only an expert in HER BP. No one else's.

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Old 05-21-2013, 07:55 AM   #13
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

I discovered that one university that she went to, I went to too. Looking on our alumni site, I discovered that her background is in theology and journalism...not mental health at all. Interesting...

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Old 05-21-2013, 09:31 AM   #14
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

It just made me angry that she put full responsability of the marriage onto the person with bipolar or depression, and not the other person. Just because there is a corrolation doesn't mean it's the absolute cause of all divorces for people with bipolar or depression.

What about the statistic that peple who have mental illness are also more likely to be the victims of violence, which include domestic violence.

I'm sure there are many cases in which bipolar or depression are a leading factor in a divorce. But, I'm just as sure that sometimes the fact that one partner has bipolar or depression was just another fact, but not a cause.

That article made me angry mostly because it didn't address how to be a proper support person, which many spouses are not. How many people do we hear say "you're lucky if your husband/wife tries to understand / is supportive." That's BS that we even think that way, but it's our reality. And, I was upset that it didn't offer any insight into steps other than meds the person with bipolar or depression should take to keep themselves healthy, and that in turn would keep the marriage healthy.

I'm on my second marriage, and in my first I had no business being married. But this time, I do my best to stay aware of how my illness can impact the people around me and myself. But, there's no way I could carry an entire marriage alone. It just doesn't work that way.
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Old 05-21-2013, 07:09 PM   #15
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

Does anyone know if there is a way to complain to PC about this article? It says the author is an associate editor - SCARY - but I'd like to make a complaint.
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Old 05-21-2013, 07:24 PM   #16
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You can contact Dr John directly.

I am so glad I found this thread! I read this and it sent me sailing ....Down. So, it's a bit of a crock, you think?

Glad to know there are some of you with a little fight left in you!
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Old 05-21-2013, 07:49 PM   #17
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

My husband has been very accepting and I take my meds. However, generalizing BP is wrong.
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Old 05-21-2013, 07:52 PM   #18
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

It makes all of us sound incapable of taking care of ourselves...buncha crap.
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Old 05-21-2013, 08:41 PM   #19
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

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You can contact Dr John directly.

I am so glad I found this thread! I read this and it sent me sailing ....Down. So, it's a bit of a crock, you think?

Glad to know there are some of you with a little fight left in you!
Who is Dr. John? Forgive me, I haven't been a PC member for a super long time.....about a year or so.
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Old 05-21-2013, 09:00 PM   #20
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Default Re: Most Depressing Psych Central Article on Bipolar

Dr John is the 'owner'/moderator of the site. Start a message with his name in the recipient box and it will pop up. He leads chats and other discussions too. Hope that helps.
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