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Old 06-23-2018, 01:20 AM   #1
imchet
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Default Have AVP, but get accused of narcissism

With AVP, do people ever treat you like you are a narcissist? I seem to get that a lot, I feel very humble, actually self esteem is really low, I feel empathetic, but somehow people often acuse me of being selfish and of acting as if I'm superior. I certainly don't feel superior...
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Old 06-23-2018, 09:34 AM   #2
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Default Re: Have AVP, but get accused of narcissism

Todd Grande on YouTube has a good video explaining the difference between the PD's, why people can confuse them, and how it's actually impossible for someone with AvPD to be narcissistic.
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Old 06-24-2018, 06:10 AM   #3
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Default Re: Have AVP, but get accused of narcissism

My reluctance to engage in conversation has been perceived as arrogance, especially in environments like the workplace where people don't really know me. I make more of an effort now to observe social norms in these situations through eye contact, saying hello or smiling when passing others, etc. I'm still uncomfortable with chitchat, but I find that these small concessions have lessened the general perception of me as intimidating and aloof.
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Old 07-02-2018, 06:08 AM   #4
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Default Re: Have AVP, but get accused of narcissism

Quote:
Originally Posted by imchet View Post
With AVP, do people ever treat you like you are a narcissist? I seem to get that a lot, I feel very humble, actually self esteem is really low, I feel empathetic, but somehow people often acuse me of being selfish and of acting as if I'm superior. I certainly don't feel superior...
I sometimes feel superior. More than anything.

Are you confessing something cryptic?

If you're not, where not alike Have AVP, but get accused of narcissism
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Old 10-19-2018, 05:04 AM   #5
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Default Re: Have AVP, but get accused of narcissism

It's projection. Narcissists with no self-awareness or even good knowledge of psychology are accusing you of having what they have.
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Old 11-23-2018, 02:51 PM   #6
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Default Re: Have AVP, but get accused of narcissism

I agree, it’s projection

I actually typed out a long rant about my Avpd (I wish I didn’t have it ) but deleted it.

Some people do misperceive some “avoidants” - usually because the judging person is lacking in compassion and empathy
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