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Old 01-15-2019, 12:32 PM   #1
shobo
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Default Autism or SAD - a bit late to realise !

Morning,
I'm in my late fifties.
My life has been dominated by what I had always assumed to be, Social Anxiety Disorder with a good bit of OCD.
In my younger years, I could not get a job for love nor money because due to my SAD I was disgracefully bad at interviews, and had very few (if any) friends. However, I was clever, so I compensated for that weakness by becoming an academic and getting a reputation. I had a successful career, I'm now retired.
OK, I say I was clever, but I might not be, I might actually have learned to become meticulous at a young age rather than being actually clever.
Over the years my SAD has diminished, due mainly to the tolerance and patience of my wife.
However I have never been able to make friends, even though I now have little shyness. I try to be good at conversing with people, and indeed I often think I am now good at conversing with people, however there must be some secret I am missing because I NEVER end up making friends. People soon get bored with me it seems, but I can't see why.
So, I did an online self-diagnosis for autism, and got 42 out of 50. Qualitatively, I think I am spot on for being highly autistic, but never suspected it ! I always assumed my weakness was severe shyness !
Can anyone out their empathise ?
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Old 01-15-2019, 08:15 PM   #2
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Hello shobo: Thanks for sharing this bit of yourself with us here on PC. I noticed this is your first post. So... welcome to Psych Central.

I'm afraid your situation is not one I can relate to as I am a pretty-much thoroughly reclusive person. I neither have nor seek friends. Hopefully, though, there will be other members who will be able to relate to your situation. In the meantime, here are links to 5 articles on the subject of adults with autism, from Psych Central's archives, including an autism test you can take:

Exploring Experiences of Adults With Self-Diagnosed Autism

Brains of Adults with Autism Adapt Differently in Implicit Learning

All About Asperger's Disorder

In-Depth: Asperger's Disorder

Autism / Asperger's Test - 2 Minute Test, Instant Results.

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
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Old 01-16-2019, 06:11 AM   #3
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Default Re: Autism or SAD - a bit late to realise !

I'm so sorry you're struggling, shobo Yes, sometimes we can discover this kind of things a lot later than we should. Did you get diagnosed with SAD or is it something that you just assumed you've had all this time? The only way to be sure of whether or not you have Autism is to get a proper diagnosis. I'd suggest to talk to your Pdoc about this. Do you see a therapist? Maybe that could help. Please don't give up, life isn't over yet and things can still improve. Many people start their lives when they're 50 or 60. So you're still in time! Sending many hugs to you
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Old 01-16-2019, 07:43 AM   #4
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I am not trying to say you do not have autism but I will say that I am leary of online tests for mental health disorders and disabilities. They are often skewed more towards encouraging a diagnosis than not. I would definitely see a doctor first before acting on the idea that you have autism or OCD. Many people assume its OCD when it can be something else and it could be that there is misinformation out about it or that they were never taken seriously as they grew up and were forced to figure out coping mechanisms on their own. I am not implying that you do not know yourself or that you dont have either of these things I am just trying to urge you to see someone before operating under the assumption that you have these conditions. There are medications that can help. Before autism was consolidated into ASD, my sister was diagnosed as having aspbergercs.. she is 27 and this was before it was a thing.. she has taken Luvox all this time and it has really helped.
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Old 01-18-2019, 11:38 PM   #5
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Default Re: Autism or SAD - a bit late to realise !

"People soon get bored with me it seems, but I can't see why."

Do you notice when someone gets bored? Next time, try asking what's wrong. Sometimes the feedback I got was right on spot, such as lack of reciprocity in social interaction.
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