Psych Central

Go Back   Forums at Psych Central > Mental Health Support > Attachment Disorders



advertisement
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 07-19-2016, 08:54 AM   #1
Your Host
Chat Leader
 
DocJohn's Avatar
DocJohn is feeling fine
 
Member Since: May 2001
Location: Greater Boston, MA
Posts: 11,703
My Mood:

10 yr Member
127 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Smile Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

This community is for support and exchange of information for adults with attachment disorders.

Enjoy,
DocJohn
__________________
Don't throw away your shot.
DocJohn is online now   Reply With Quote
Hugs from:

advertisement
Old 07-19-2016, 09:04 AM   #2
Member
StarBlue has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2016
Location: earth
Posts: 242
76 hugs
given
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

Can we also get threads?
StarBlue is offline   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Hugs from:
Old 07-20-2016, 09:39 AM   #3
Grand Magnate
 
Breadfish's Avatar
Breadfish has no updates.
 
Member Since: Feb 2014
Location: Bad Place
Posts: 3,974 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood:

3 yr Member
1,064 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

May I ask why it is about ADULTS with attachment disorders, instead of everyone with attachment disorders?
__________________
"All the 'great secrets' under the mountains had turned out to be just empty night:
there was nothing more to find out, nothing worth doing, only nasty furtive eating and resentful remembering."

-- J.R.R. Tolkien
Breadfish is offline   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Hugs from:
Old 07-20-2016, 12:03 PM   #4
Seeker
 
Gus1234U's Avatar
Gus1234U AWAKEN~!
 
Member Since: Jun 2010
Location: Here
Posts: 8,115 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood:

5 yr Member PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

for those who aren't sure what the topic is:

[Attachment Theory and Research

Developmental psychologist John Bowlby originally described the concept of attachment, focusing on the bond between mother and infant. Attachment, according to Bowlby, is not a one-time event, but a process that begins with birth and extends into the early years of life. A child's relationship with the primary caregiver, who is often the mother, can affect the child's attachment style throughout life, and insecure attachments can often interfere with future romantic relationships.

Children generally develop healthy, secure attachments to mothers who competently and regularly respond to the child's needs by, for example, feeding the child when the child cries. There has been significantly less research investigating the process of attachment between father and child, but preliminary studies indicate that the process is similar, with perhaps more emphasis on play.

Researchers often measure attachment with the Strange Situation Test, developed by developmental psychologist Mary Ainsworth. In this test, a mother leaves her child with researchers, who observe the child's reactions. Children with secure attachments demonstrated a strong attachment to the mother, while children with insecure attachments exhibited a variety of unusual and unhealthy reactions, including becoming angry with the mother upon her return.

The test results determined four types of attachment:

Secure: The child will interact with others in the presence of the mother and will become upset when she leaves and avoid contact with strangers. This demonstrates a healthy attachment.

Anxious-Resistant Insecure: The child will become anxious at the presence of strangers and will not interact with them. When the mother leaves, the child will become very upset and will be unreceptive to her attempts to interact when she returns. This may demonstrate that the parent does not consistently meet the child's needs.

Anxious-Avoidant Insecure: The child shows ambivalence toward the mother and toward strangers, does not want to be held, and shows no preference toward caregivers. This attachment style typically means that a child has learned that efforts to have needs met will be ignored.

Disorganized/Disoriented: Though a child with this attachment issue may become upset when the mother leaves and appear relieved when she returns, the child may refuse to be held, hit or rock repeatedly, and show anger toward the mother.

Over half of the mothers of children with a disorganized or disoriented attachment were shown to have experienced trauma-induced depression shortly before giving birth.]

Therapy for Attachment, Therapist for Attachment

i hope this helps orient the conversation. if others have a different understanding of Attachment Disorders, i hope you will share it.
Gus1234U is offline   Reply With Quote
Hugs from:
Old 07-20-2016, 12:58 PM   #5
Member
 
LeeeLeee's Avatar
LeeeLeee has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2016
Location: Earth
Posts: 127
My Mood:

245 hugs
given
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

I believe the root cause of my problems is an attachment disorder. Without telling my whole story, it seems like each of my relationships was created to "confirm" that I can't trust men, that I should not trust them, entering into relationships with people who are in some way unavailable, usually emotionally unavailable, preoccupied with other things.

I hit rock bottom in this disorder when I entered into a relationship that was inappropriate and quite toxic to my life because the partner was unavailable in the worst possible way... he was married. This was the most personally devastating experience I've ever had and I am forced to look at my issues, after believing for so many years that I had it all figured out.

Since then I've been in therapy, and a strict diet of no sex or romantic partnerships while trying to understand how to better navigate that territory of love and attachment.

Anyway, grateful to have this forum. Thank you so much.
LeeeLeee is offline   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Old 07-20-2016, 01:47 PM   #6
Apparition
 
Skeezyks's Avatar
Skeezyks has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: The Minne-apple
Posts: 13,185 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood:

2 yr Member
9,218 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Smile Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

This is interesting. Of course, it has been many, many years since the Skeezyks was an infant. But I can recall my mother telling me (when I was older) that as an infant when she would hold me to try to comfort me I would stiffen up & cry all the harder.

I also, as a very young child, began bumping my head to go to sleep. There used to be a picture of me, taken when I was around 2 years old I would say, & in it you could see a round bald spot just above my hairline where the hair had been worn away from me bumping my head. (I continued to do this until I finally broke myself of the habit when I was a teenager.)

So I wonder what that all says about my attachment type... (It's all water over the dam now.) Anyway... thanks for this Thread & for the interesting information!
__________________
"Oh, to be hidden / in a cleft between great rocks, / someplace far away, / with no fear of being seen-- / there to bear my pains alone." (the poet monk Saigyo, Japan, 1118-1190, C.E.)
Skeezyks is online now   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Old 07-20-2016, 01:53 PM   #7
formerly hankster
 
unaluna's Avatar
unaluna wore shoes like this in the sixties. Now she's in her sixties :(
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 25,891 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood:

5 yr Member
29k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

Quote:
Originally Posted by StarBlue View Post
Can we also get threads?
Yep this would be the place to open a new thread
unaluna is online now   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Hugs from:
Old 07-20-2016, 02:00 PM   #8
formerly hankster
 
unaluna's Avatar
unaluna wore shoes like this in the sixties. Now she's in her sixties :(
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 25,891 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood:

5 yr Member
29k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

Quote:
Originally Posted by Breadfish View Post
May I ask why it is about ADULTS with attachment disorders, instead of everyone with attachment disorders?
If you read the posts leading up to the creation of this forum - its like, kids are NOT diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, they have an attachment disorder. Then, once youre an adult, its the opposite! Magically You dont have an attachment disorder, youre borderline! So its to counter that kind of thinking and naming, rather than to exclude by age.
unaluna is online now   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Hugs from:
Old 07-21-2016, 02:31 AM   #9
Member
StarBlue has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2016
Location: earth
Posts: 242
76 hugs
given
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

Deep beneath every psychiatric label and psychogical constellation there is a root cause. In all cases there was a disconnect and misfiring of neurons and faulty coding of the brain and subsequently the autonomic nervous system went into high gear. Across all disorders you will find at the core some crucial instance of failure to receive that which was vitally necessary to thrive and instill within a healthy perception of self and others.

My understanding is that BPD has at its core an attachment disorder. The other experiences needed for that particular disorder constellation were added into the mix on top of the attachment failure - and the recipe is complete. So it is with every other dis-order. 0-3 foundations are laid - brain develops and matures - and everything on top of that is the conditioning - given enough of X and enough Y and add a sprinkle of Z and add specific time intervals. energies, and space into that equation and the disorder will come into its own. Healing is a reversal of this. Putting the pieces back into their rightful place.




Quote:
Originally Posted by unaluna View Post
If you read the posts leading up to the creation of this forum - its like, kids are NOT diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, they have an attachment disorder. Then, once youre an adult, its the opposite! Magically You dont have an attachment disorder, youre borderline! So its to counter that kind of thinking and naming, rather than to exclude by age.
StarBlue is offline   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Old 07-21-2016, 10:00 AM   #10
Seeker
 
Gus1234U's Avatar
Gus1234U AWAKEN~!
 
Member Since: Jun 2010
Location: Here
Posts: 8,115 (SuperPoster!)
My Mood:

5 yr Member PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Welcome to the Attachment Disorders forum

i agree, Skeez, that some children seem to be born with problems, and nothing in the pregnancy to explain it. i was told i had 'colic' the first 3 months, and cried inconsolably. my mother would put alcohol with sugar water (hot toddy) in my bottle. she had already left my one yr old brother with her own mother, so i don't think she wanted kids very much...

for what ever the reason, i learned not to attach to people, and to let go, quick and in a hurry. it as affected all my relationships all my life. it's 'normal', for me. and to tell the truth, i'm a little (more than a little ) bit glad that i don't get torn up every time someone leaves or dies (or doesn't like me).

so, i have no motivation to change, and i am interested to see if people who are motivated find some success at it,,,

best wishes~~ to all~~~~
Gus1234U is offline   Reply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Hugs from:
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:36 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



advertisement

 

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice,
diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.
Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.

 

HomeAbout UsContact UsPrivacy PolicyTerms of UseDisclaimer
Forums HomeCommunity GuidelinesHelp


 
Helplines and Lifelines