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Old 11-03-2017, 03:21 PM   #1
lildaisy
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Default relapse anorexia - recovery is harder?

Hi y'all,

Since my 16th I have anorexia nervosa. After a number of years (inpatient) treatments, I recovered. I never reached a healthy weight though, but my underweight wasn't dangerously low anymore and I was barely bothered by my eating disorder.
I am now 27 years old and 2.5 years ago I had a relapse. I never expected that I would ever get to this point again.
I made some progress this year. And in recent months, I had a lot of hope. I felt things slightly changed in my head and I was really motivated to get better .
But since last week I am becoming a bit desperate. My weight gain went too fast in my opinion and I want to go back to a certain weight because I didn't had enough time to get used to that certain weight at the time. So, i want to see that number again. So I can get used to it and then get back to my current weight, at an achievable pace.
But last days the voice has become very strong. I'm trying to follow a certain menu and eat certain stuff, but once I want to get it, I start to doubt and throw it away.
I hope this is just a slip and the thoughts and fears become less, just like it was before.

In any case, it turns out that the relapse in last 2 years is so much more difficult to recover from, comparing to the beginning of my illness. Is this common? In this relapse, I feel worse than at the beginning of my illness, mentally and physically. The battle also feels more difficult. When I was 16, it also took me several years to recover and it wasn't easy whatsoever, but now it seems like the progress is slower and the eating disorder behavior is even worse.
I wonder if there are people who recognize themselves a little and how you dealed with a relapse. What really helped you?
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Old 11-10-2017, 10:06 AM   #2
eskielover
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Default Re: relapse anorexia - recovery is harder?

As I got my whole life stable, my anorexia stabilized too. Trauma, stress, & emotional issues were a huge triggering factor. When the triggering factors get resolved it helps resolve the ED.....I'm the talking triggering factors being the number on the scales....I'm talking about the life issues that started your anorexia up 2 years ago. Those are the issues that need to be worked on while you eat to survive.

What pushed my last recovery was that I left my bad marriage & bought a farm in another state out in the country. I had to be able to function TOTALLY ALONE, work outside & inside & have no one to depend on or look out for me if I passed out like I normally did. I needed energy & only FOOD could give me what I needed to survive on my own. Enough work so never worry about gaining too much though I do eat basically what I need to function. The relief of being away from the stressful marriage & away from where I had got through the trauma during my moms death from cancer helped my recovery.

Last edited by eskielover; 11-10-2017 at 10:25 AM..
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Old 03-18-2018, 03:38 PM   #3
Blueberrybook
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Default Re: relapse anorexia - recovery is harder?

Not necessarily. I had a relapse in 2012. It was easier for me to regain my footing than with the initial recovery. I'm not sure why it was so much easier the second time around. It just was for me, maybe because I was finally on the right psych meds? I'd long been misdiagnosed with major depression, which was later changed to bipolar. I also had a psychiatrist I trusted a lot more the 2nd time around.
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Old 03-20-2018, 12:23 AM   #4
eskielover
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Default Re: relapse anorexia - recovery is harder?

Anorexia is very much caused by the siruatikns we are in more than the body image issues they want to always blame it on. When our situation is better recovery is much easier especislly when we have a good support network in place
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