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Old 07-07-2018, 08:19 AM   #1
BirdDancer
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Default I am thinking about going to Al anon

I'd rather not write a long post at this time, but my siblings and I (from 47 to 53) have been quite concerned about my 76 year old father's drinking and mental health for some years now. The drinking issue has really only been problematic for about 6 years now, though the mental health issues date back probably since his childhood, but have never been properly addressed.

Things are getting bad, but luckily nothing severe has yet happened, but it soon could. He's been having blackouts lately and goes from euphoric to very depressed and talking about death. My siblings and I have discussed the issue with him, and are again now. My brother and sister have probably talked to him again this morning. If he quit drinking, which may be difficult for him, I think he'd need to stop going to some of the places he goes daily. His girlfriend also needs to stop being an enabler.

I'm thinking about going to Al Anon. I've never been there, but have been to AA in the past for my own past alcohol abuse. I'm wondering what to expect from it and how that can help me better know how to help him, but also help me. I feel like being on the opposite end of this issue is a fairly new experience and my siblings and I have let too much time pass. Our relationships with him have become distant, which is so sad! We love him, of course, and miss him.

Note: Many people in my family have and still are dealing with mental health issues.
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Old 07-07-2018, 09:26 AM   #2
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Default Re: I am thinking about going to Al anon

Thank you for posting this. I've been considering the same lately and I'm sure that the responses you get will be helpful for me too.
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Old 07-07-2018, 01:24 PM   #3
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Default Re: I am thinking about going to Al anon

I went to Al-Anon a while for my mother's alcoholism. It actually helped quite a bit. I learned to detach from toxic people and give space for myself.
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Old 07-09-2018, 02:03 PM   #4
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I went to my first Al-Anon meeting this morning. The group seemed very nice. It was likely a step-type meeting. Since I was new, the leader had the group read Step 1. The reading was helpful, and it was interesting to listen to everyone's shares. It was different from the AA meetings I've been to in the past. In the AA meetings I went to, not everyone shared. In this Al-Anon meeting, everyone shared after reading a part of the Step reading. I'm sure people could have passed on speaking, though.



The meeting got pretty emotional at times. Some of the members started to cry as they told their stories. I started to really understand more how terribly alcoholism can affect family and friends. I was there because my siblings and I have started to be affected by my dad's drinking, but we don't live with my dad, so there is a bit of a distance. My dad did not have drinking problems when we were younger living at home. He did have some mood problems, but so did I as a teen.
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I have Bipolar type 1

Tegretol XR generic (1200 mg)
Lamictal generic (100 mg)
Seroquel XR generic (600 mg)
Klonopin generic (0.5 mg)
Ativan generic ("as needed" only)

Others: Propranolol (40 mg), Synthroid (150 mcg), multi-vitamin, iron supplement (during period)
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Old 07-11-2018, 03:13 AM   #5
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Default Re: I am thinking about going to Al anon

I don't know Al-Anon, but I've been participating in ACoA online meetings for quite a while now and it has been helping me incredibly. Getting in touch with people who went through similar things is so helpful as you get validated that your feelings are very real. I highly recommend it!
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Old 07-12-2018, 08:26 AM   #6
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Default Re: I am thinking about going to Al anon

Quote:
Originally Posted by gmts View Post
I don't know Al-Anon, but I've been participating in ACoA online meetings for quite a while now and it has been helping me incredibly. Getting in touch with people who went through similar things is so helpful as you get validated that your feelings are very real. I highly recommend it!

Do you mind me asking where you access this online meeting through? I'm an ACOA and identify with just about every characteristic of ACOAs, but there is no ACOA meeting in my area. I would love to join one online, but I didn't know where to start.
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Old 07-16-2018, 02:10 PM   #7
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Default Re: I am thinking about going to Al anon

Alanon was a huge help to me. Very worthwhile.
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Old 07-16-2018, 07:47 PM   #8
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I missed the Al-Anon meeting today because my husband was home after we experienced a deck fire this weekend. I also had a therapy appointment. I kind of doubt I'll have therapy on Mondays after too long. I'll try to return to the Al-Anon meetings when that time comes.
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I have Bipolar type 1

Tegretol XR generic (1200 mg)
Lamictal generic (100 mg)
Seroquel XR generic (600 mg)
Klonopin generic (0.5 mg)
Ativan generic ("as needed" only)

Others: Propranolol (40 mg), Synthroid (150 mcg), multi-vitamin, iron supplement (during period)
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Old 07-18-2018, 09:48 AM   #9
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Default Re: I am thinking about going to Al anon

Quote:
Originally Posted by stillgrowing View Post
Do you mind me asking where you access this online meeting through? I'm an ACOA and identify with just about every characteristic of ACOAs, but there is no ACOA meeting in my area. I would love to join one online, but I didn't know where to start.

Sorry for the late reply, haven't been around for quite a while.


Please check:
https://adultchildren.org/quick-sear...ebt=Click+Here


Find a meeting in your language that suits you in day and time and click on "Meeting contact", there you will find contact information.



Typically online meetings are through "Skype" which you need to install on your phone, tablet or notebook. Then you create an account on "Skype". It is not advisable to supply your full name here as it will be visible to other members in the meeting. Either use a nickname or something like "Susan F.".

You then add the Skype contact as displayed in the detail information and then they will skype call you at the given time and you accept the call and that's it. Your choice if you want activate your camera or not.

First time in a meeting you are requested to introduce yourself with your first name ("Hi, I'm Susan") and all other members will do the same.

So, details may vary, but that's about how it works. If you feel you can't do all that computer stuff, you might want to ask a friend for help.
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