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Old 02-07-2019, 11:34 AM  
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Default Re: How to avoid fighting with a bully SIL who only wants to fight?

Originally Posted by starfruit504 View Post
So what do you do when someone is totally bent on having an argument with you? I assume whenever I see her again she will try to instigate this "discussion." I'm going to see her at ((her wedding is this year!!)) Thanksgiving, other holidays, no matter how much time passes, she's just waiting to have a fight with me? Arguing is not only a waste of time, it will fill her with even more bad feelings. The compassionate thing to do is NOT argue.
It sounds like she wants to provoke you. You could tell her, "We are not going to have a discussion about this" and be consistent with it. Yes, I know she could be equally consistent. But her aim is for you to give in. Don't give in. Once you open the door to the conversation, it's going to be very hard to get out of it. I speak from my own personal experience.

But if you ever end up discussing it, make it a one time deal, so that next time she bugs you, you can say, "We already discussed about this and we are done."
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