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Old 01-01-2019, 02:00 PM  
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Smile Re: Advice - Run Away?

One thing I don't recall you mentioning, in your post, was whether or not you have sought any kind of mental health therapy for the issues you're dealing with. I'm not a mental health professional. So all I can offer you is my personal opinion. However, based on what you wrote here, it sounds to me as though you have a number of intertwined "threads" going on here. First off, you have your relationship with your friend which it sounds like has gone the way a number of previous friendships have gone throughout your life. And then the other "thread" that is running through your quandary relates to the university you're attending & whether or not you should stay or try to transfer.

I think, first of all, you should try to separate the experience you've had with your friend from your thoughts regarding the university you're attending. They're two completely separate issues & there is a danger that you will end up making a decision regarding your education based on your relationship concerns. I could go into a lot of detail here with regard to all of this & write quite a lengthy reply. But, rather than do that, I'll simply try to summarize by saying that the experience you've had with this friend sounds, from what you wrote, like it's just one in a line of similar experiences you've had over the years. Transferring to another university isn't likely to change that. You'll simply carry your relationship-building difficulties on to your next location.

By the same token, staying where you are, & trying to "tough out" how you're feeling isn't likely to accomplish a whole lot either. Perhaps you may manage if you're emotionally tough enough to bury your feelings & forge ahead. But nothing will be resolved in terms of how relationships seem to repeatedly go for you. Ultimately, I think it would be better to acknowledge you have a history of relationship-building problems that needs to be looked into & hopefully resolved perhaps with the aid of a mental health therapist or a psychologist. And then in conjunction with that you can make a decision, regarding the university you're attending, based on what is going to be best for you academically & in terms of your professional future not based on how it may or may not help you to resolve your current emotional turmoil regarding your friend. Does that make sense? At least these are my thoughts with regard to your post.
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