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Old 12-11-2018, 06:44 AM  
divine1966
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Default Re: I really hurt the man I love

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Originally Posted by leomama View Post
We had a long distance relationship where he would come and see me. We were engaged while he was married, which is why after 3 years of that I pushed the pause button, not the stop button, not the eject button. At any rate that is my dilemma, he claims he broke up with me one month before his divorce was finalized. Of course we continued to communicate as I had no idea he had broken up with me. I thought that was a joke because I was the one who was waiting for him to get divorced from his wife. Yes I saw several therapists to help me through. I wouldn't say its a blessing he is gone, it hurts, I miss him and I love him but there is nothing I can do to get him back. He has an aunt who is a therapist and she was treating him for his ptsd. He said something really bad about me to her so I'm sure she was instrumental in his "letting me go". He didn't even tell her he proposed to me, he simply told her I was his girlfriend. I was like, what?!?
Marrying someone like that wouldn’t result in happy marriage. You can never trust him. He seems to enjoy game playing.

He “pretend” proposes while being married to someone else (you can’t be engaged AND married at the same time unless one is in polygamist), then refers to you as a girlfriend behind your back while claiming being “engaged” to your face, he breaks up with you but not tell you that, instead keeps dragging you along, refuses to come see you yet demands unreasonable declarations of love, and all insane lies in the past! Do you want a husband like that? Not a good foundation for marriage. It would be a nightmare!

I’d focus on working with your therapist on figuring out why you’d want to have him back and be married to someone like that. Of course even if bad relationship end it hurts, but good times are ahead.
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