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Old 11-15-2018, 07:27 PM  
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unfoldingxwings RDJ liked my Instagram post. OMG!!! He's one of my heroes.
Member Since: Nov 2018
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Default Re: Emotional Abuse > Going Along With It > Shame

I can't tell you what this is called. I have no idea. But I'm sure anyone who has survived emotional abuse and neglect will see themselves in this.

For instance, when I was emotionally abused and neglected, I couldn't counteract or fight back. Because both parents had explosive anger that could get violent. I had to be quiet. Seen but not heard, as it is called. I didn't smile when things were said to me, but I didn't show an emotional reaction in front of them either. I would go to my room and cry.

Later on, when I had an adult disabled child who was still being abused, I started to fight back and get vocal. It's forced my parents to have a very different relationship with me, one where they don't dare say even the most slightly abusive thing because I get triggered and go off. And what gets said is ugly.

There is no real reason why we are targeted. Sometimes we're just the easiest one for them to vent on or throw blame for their problems. We ourselves are not defective or to blame for the abuse. I'm sorry you are targeted. It isn't right. It's not fair. And yes, it is wrong. And I'm very sorry. If you can get help, maybe a therapist could assist you in working through this. That's what I'm about to do. Maybe your parent's have personality disorders (mine do) and other mental illnesses (mine do). Maybe they were abused as children. There's a lot of dynamics that could be considered.
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