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Old 10-31-2018, 07:55 PM  
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Confused My T Wants Me To Find New Fantasies

I opened up to my T about a subject I've never discussed with a T before. We talked about my sex life. I told her I was haven't been able to orgasm with masturbation since I've moved, never having an orgasm with a partner, and the nature of my fantasies. I told her I need to be in absolute control and that my best orgasms come from anger and frustration, which she said is the opposite of where orgasms should come from. She said there needs to be some lack of control in sex in order to climax, and that being able to orgasm when angry is unusual.

I told her that I've had the same two fantasies my whole life, and I can have the same characters in these fantasies for years at a time.

We talked more in-depth about this, and she said what I knew what was coming, to find new fantasies to try to help me climax rather than the old fantasies. She didn't say these fantasies I've had are wrong or that I shouldn't have these fantasies, but she suggested exploring a new, interesting fantasy to help me find climax.

My fantasies have always been tried and true, but I agree these fantasies do nothing for me anymore. I also told her that I need an emotional bond with the characters in my fantasy as well as in real life, I told her I no longer wish to have casual sex or sex with people I haven't emotionally bonded with. So how do I find a new target of my fantasy?

The first two potential fantasies that popped into my head are Chris Pratt and Loki (Tom Hiddleston), two striking sexual icons (for me, at least) but I haven't "bonded" with either of them and never thought to pursue them for new fantasy characters. Finding a new fantasy is like extensive dating, it doesn't happen overnight because I need to invest in time to get to the point of "yes, I can climax to the image of this person" and I don't know how to begin.

Any thoughts or suggestions would be appreciated.

Last edited by LiteraryLark; 10-31-2018 at 08:15 PM..
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