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Unread 05-06-2013, 12:42 PM   #1
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Default Feeling trapped and life going nowhere.

I've tried for many years to sort out my problems with various self-help books and other things but I'm now in my late twenties(male) and I don't seem to be any better, if anything probably worse. I've had emotional problems since my teens that I've always kept hidden from everyone thinking I could sort them out by myself but I'm starting to conclude that I can't do this by myself any more. I think my main problem has always been depression essentially and the other problems I have, like chronic guilt and social phobia, are related to it.

I'd like to get some help for my problems but I feel too self-conscious to actually do so. I still live with my parents and i don't even want them to know that I have emotional problems. I think it's because my father has always been a very harsh and critical man who would use any weakness to criticise and belittle me and others. I've tried to get away from home before but my problems didn't go away and I couldn't cope by myself and had to go back.

When I say my main problem seems to be depression, it's not that I feel very down and hopeless all the time it's more that I feel very lethargic and lacking motivation to do any serious work. Getting out of bed is the most difficult thing I have to do everyday. Then I tend to feel quite a lot of guilt about lying in bed a good bit of the day and not doing much work, and even more if I try to do something I enjoy or that motivates me.

Essentially I feel trapped in this dead-end life and I'm desperate for it to change but I don't really know how to do that without risking myself too much. I just hope writing about my problems and getting some advice will help me make some progress. Thanks for reading.
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Unread 05-07-2013, 08:22 AM   #2
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Default Re: Feeling trapped and life going nowhere.

Hello and Welcome to Psych Central. I'm so glad you found us and I know you'll like it here.

From reading your post, I think you'd benefit from the Depression forum first. The people there are very friendly, supportive, and knowledgeable. Plus they'll give you very good advice ~ so I do think you'll really benefit from it. You may also want to stop in at the Panic and Anxiety forum too later on.

Again welcome, and I hope we hear more from you. I wish you the very best. God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee
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Unread 05-07-2013, 08:49 AM   #3
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Default Re: Feeling trapped and life going nowhere.

Hi noprogress.Im completely new to this site and i'm only sorry i did'nt find it earlier.I have gone through many years of depression believing that that was just how it was and that i could only ride with it.Much of my life has been spent feeling that i do'nt fit in and that everyone else was o.k. because they were luckier than me and although i thought i was doing things right i began to think otherwise and doubt myself.

You are a lot younger than me but i identify with what you say quite a lot as will many others i guess.

If it's any consolation to you i can tell you this.I have spent most of my life thinking i am second rate,that i do'nt fit in,that i am odd and that i will always be miserable and that i must just live with it.It is only recently that i have sort of "found myself" and realised that i am just "me",it's how i am and i have to live with that.It's early days for me right now but i am trying to be positive and move forward.My biggest regret is that i did'nt "find myself" earlier as i would'nt have wasted so much time feeling like an outcast.

I am seeing a phychotherapist tomorrow for the first time and i'm really dreading it.It has taken me years to get to this point and although i am more than ready to open up i am scared silly that what i say will go unheard.

The best advice i can give you is take everyday as it comes,learn to be "you" and try not to falter from that path.If others cannot accept you as you are then they may not be the right friends for you.Time passing in the right frame of mind can reap a happier future and a calmer state of mind.

I wish you well,Paul.
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