|03-23-2013, 10:00 PM||#1|
black dog boogie has no updates.
Member Since: Feb 2013
Completely alone in this
Recently my doctor wrote a referral to the mental health service for me. In the same appointment he prescribed me some fluoxetine which I started taking the next day.
2 weeks later, the mental health service finally called to touch base with me and ask some questions over the phone. However, because I was 2 weeks into my fluoxetine and feeling better than I had been at the time of my doctor's appointment (and I mentioned over the phone that I was starting to feel better from the fluox), they have declined my referral.
This happened last time too. A couple of years ago I tried to get some help from the mental health service. I actually had an appointment that time and the lady who "assessed" me, didn't ask me at all about my issues or how I was feeling. She wrote in her assessment that because I was wearing makeup that day and had been taking part in some social activities that I didn't need to be seen by a psych.
They don't ask for any history or ask if my depression affects my daily life or work. I have lost so many jobs in the past because of depression. Of course they didn't ask me about that and in the moment I forgot to say anything about it, or about how depression really affects my every day life. I really thought this time I might be able to get some help, but they've declined me. I think I pretty much have to be cutting my wrists to be taken seriously by them, and I'm not at that point, but I do need help or I will go down again.
Already I am having another down day. It's been about three weeks on fluox. The first week I was high as a kite. Now I'm tired every day, my sleep patterns have turned to **** and I don't want to socialise, I hate everybody and I hate myself the most. I am so tired of feeling tired!
I can't ask any of my friends for help because whenever I'm doing this badly, I can't seem to find the courage to tell anyone. If I do tell someone, I immediately feel stupid and ashamed.
If the mental health service won't help me then I really am entirely alone. There is no hope for me. I'll never get better because no one seems to recognise how badly I'm doing in the first place.
I literally HATE the person I am and I am sick of living with myself every day. It's draining. I hate everyone else for being able to do life without this. I hate my friends for having normal lives. Right now I can function, but it's not much of a life. I get very little joy out of anything and I find it incredibly hard to feel connected to other people.
I'm so angry and feel so alone. I hate myself. I have all this rage. There's no one I can talk to who really cares. Why is it so easy for other girls my age to make friends, and even have BEST friends, and I can't? I know that I am self centered because of depression and I don't want to be, but I don't know how to shake all these self-centered thoughts.
Right now I wish I had never been born.
|03-23-2013, 10:14 PM||#2|
IowaFarmGal Must get busy on the job search even if it feels hopeless
Member Since: May 2012
Posts: 43,485 (SuperPoster!)
Re: Completely alone in this
Maybe journal this stuff and use it to talk to them in a way they will recognize. It seems like they have a bias to exclude to cut down on the caseload. I think maybe this is not a time to put your best foot forward. So sorry they are making it difficult to get what you need.
|03-23-2013, 10:55 PM||#3|
anonymous8113 has no updates. Edit
Re: Completely alone in this
Please go back to the doctor who wrote a referral for you and ask him to continue to treat you until he feels that you must be turned over to a psyciatrist for treatment. If necessary print a copy of the post you just wrote to us and carry it with you when you go back to him.
It may be that he will increase your medication and add one for sleep and relaxation.
It sometimes take two or three visits to get the right "cocktail" of meds to treat
You can get better and you need assistance. If you can't get it through one group
please see your current doctor so that you have a stand by when needed. I feel sure he will be happy to help you.